Our Destined world
My trees are made of bones.
When winds blow they chitter and
crack. A wood full of pale
yellows, bleached whites and creams.
I've abatised this land.
They fall asunder, one by one,
And I smile, looking ay my future.
And my past.
The sky is a bloody smile.
It grins down at me as I
fulfil my human destiny. No
matter if I'm the only one,
this abstruse desires within.
Sulphuric shapes bleed and blend.
Blending into my vision as I chop
One more. One more.
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Hello! The alpaca has dropped by to leave a review! 🦙
I'll be giving a short review for this interesting piece.
When there's a poem titled "Our Destined World", I immediately think of two kinds of outcomes. Either it's going to be a dreamy optimistic view of how our world can improve into this wonderful space where the crime is 0 (which is unlikely) and that everyone would be at peace with each other (which is more unlikely). That or a pessimistic, soul-crushing, eye-opening poem that shows how our world is slowly going under and nearing an apocalyptic scene.
You did the second and did it in such vivid yet abstract imagery using human anatomy. Honestly, I'd like to think you did that because humans are the ones who caused their own demise therefore they deserved the honor to have their bodily parts be the graphic descriptions for this end of the world scenery.
Anyways, the way you used the imagery was wonderful and I was able to follow it even if you used abstract imagery which is great. I like to see this poem from the view of the last person on earth, seeking warmth from a cold hostile world. Yet in doing so, he has to chop down one more tree (or bone?) to kindle a fire. The world taunts him in a somewhat creepy way, but he has to fulfill his human destiny. To survive as much as he can then die.
Overall, this grotesque poem was really interesting and a strange read (in a good way). Maybe we can do something to stop it. But the ticking bomb has been set.
This is alpacaboss, signing off.
for some reason I'm obsessed with anything with human anatomy mixed with art, I love painting it and writing about it. So I'm a little biased in liking the imagery this poem gives. Comparing nature to our own human bodies with bones and blood is soooo cool, I love it. It gives me the feeling that we are all one and the same, as we smile, the sky smiles. Not completely sure what this poem has to do with destiny though, in my interpretation, it's like it's our destiny to end up being part of nature. Like how when we are buried when we die, we become part of the elements. Overall, I liked this poem, I think it was cool and made me think.
Hello - Lim here to leave a comment. This is a super interesting and dark take on "human destiny"! The mixture of bone imagery with the trees caught my attention, and the colours of the trees seem very eerie and foreboding. The intense poetic voice really works for this as well. Great work!