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Eva Leroux-Midnight Witch

by vampricone6783


*This story is underneath my folder titled “Midnight Witch x Y/N”. Gacha Club character designs are underneath my folder titled “My character designs <33”. Enjoy!*



In a fairly popular theater, there was a pink robot girl named Marina who would sing for anyone who paid change. She performed in a far, tucked away corner of the theater, next to vending machines filled with snacks no one wanted, so if people wanted to see her, they had to all know how far she was from most of what was there.

A ten year old girl named Eva Leroux loved to see Marina sing, so her Mom and Dad would take her on weekends to see the beloved pink bot.

That fateful day was no different.

It was Saturday, April 16th, 2022 when Eva was in the tucked away corner of the theater, staring at the glass case which held Marina. Her parents were watching a movie in the actual movie part of the theater, not a care in the world.

Eva noticed a bright flame behind Marina glowing dangerously. It seemed to crawl all around her, melting away the circuits and wiring.

Marina was on fire…Marina was on fire…Marina was on FIRE!

“Marina is on fire!” Eva yelled, trying to get the attention of others.

But she was all alone. No one would come to save Marina, the sweet robot who loved to sing. Eva didn’t see any buckets of water anywhere, and the flames were spreading fast, discoloring the cheerful pink of Marina’s exterior into something far more grotesque.

Was there anything she could do?

That was when Eva saw something that she would never forget.

A tall man in a purple suit with a candle flame for a head stepped out from behind Marina, his orange eyes glowing maliciously. Eva, paralyzed in fear, watched as he reached out towards her, pulling her into the case, scalding her skin, seeping her in terror.

Why wasn’t anyone around to help her and Marina?

The flames that snuffed out her flesh were not natural flames. There was a faint violet tint to them, and it drew blood from Eva’s body, leaving no burn marks, but deep, penetrating cuts in her skin.

By the time she gained the strength to scream, her throat was dried up from the fire.

Once the man was done, there was no evidence that Eva was ever there at all.

However, if one looked closely at Marina, they would see a young, ghostlike girl next to her, as if the robot were her only friend.


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Sun Jun 23, 2024 4:17 am
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KateHardy wrote a review...



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Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm Kate and I'm here to leave a quick review!!


First Impression

Ahh another beautiful little tale. Melancholy as always this one with yet another mysterious figure presenting yet another mysterious threat to everything around it. Quite the devastation there to be ending on, you really feel for Eva and Maria both there.

Anyway let's get right to: Kate's Line by Line Reactions;

In a fairly popular theater, there was a pink robot girl named Marina who would sing for anyone who paid change. She performed in a far, tucked away corner of the theater, next to vending machines filled with snacks no one wanted, so if people wanted to see her, they had to all know how far she was from most of what was there.

A ten year old girl named Eva Leroux loved to see Marina sing, so her Mom and Dad would take her on weekends to see the beloved pink bot.

That fateful day was no different.


Oooh okay. Well this is a simple enough start here. You'd think that its a fairly simple little opening with a fairly simple little girl who here is leading a fairly simple little life and just going about her day as one tends to. We'll see where it leads though.

It was Saturday, April 16th, 2022 when Eva was in the tucked away corner of the theater, staring at the glass case which held Marina. Her parents were watching a movie in the actual movie part of the theater, not a care in the world.

Eva noticed a bright flame behind Marina glowing dangerously. It seemed to crawl all around her, melting away the circuits and wiring.

Marina was on fire…Marina was on fire…Marina was on FIRE!


Oh dear that does not seem to be good at all there. Marina looks to be in a lot of trouble and the fact that Eva has to try so hard to get attention to it suggests either she has to do something or poor Marina is just going to burn.

“Marina is on fire!” Eva yelled, trying to get the attention of others.

But she was all alone. No one would come to save Marina, the sweet robot who loved to sing. Eva didn’t see any buckets of water anywhere, and the flames were spreading fast, discoloring the cheerful pink of Marina’s exterior into something far more grotesque.

Was there anything she could do?


Well looks like that's just exactly as I feared it was going to be in that moment with things just escalating really badly down into the dumps there with the way Marina is just being left alone to burn.

That was when Eva saw something that she would never forget.

A tall man in a purple suit with a candle flame for a head stepped out from behind Marina, his orange eyes glowing maliciously. Eva, paralyzed in fear, watched as he reached out towards her, pulling her into the case, scalding her skin, seeping her in terror.

Why wasn’t anyone around to help her and Marina?


Oh dear. This is going from bad to worse from the looks of it. This definitely isn't about to end well and poor Eva is going to get engulfed too and well I doubt anyone's coming to help either of them at this point.

The flames that snuffed out her flesh were not natural flames. There was a faint violet tint to them, and it drew blood from Eva’s body, leaving no burn marks, but deep, penetrating cuts in her skin.

By the time she gained the strength to scream, her throat was dried up from the fire.

Once the man was done, there was no evidence that Eva was ever there at all.

However, if one looked closely at Marina, they would see a young, ghostlike girl next to her, as if the robot were her only friend.


Welp. That's one way to become a midnight witch starting out as a young girl I suppose. Ahh a truly tragic ending to this one. Eva just trying to help her friend consumed by it too and now turned into this ghost, completely removed from the world she knew and loved.

Aaand that's it for this oneee!!!

Overall

Overall another really powerful tale to cap this one off here. I think you've gone and done quite an amazing job honestly. Really showcasing Eva's very innocent dreams, then her trying to fight for Marina and of course the horrible result of it all.

As always remember to: Take what you think was helpful and forget the rest!

Stay Safe and Have a Nice Day!
Kate


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Wed Jun 19, 2024 5:47 pm
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One2Three wrote a review...



Hi vampirecone6783, just read one of your stories "Charlotte's Demise" and i also reviewed that one so i am writing another review (Need more reviewer's points)
Firstly, are you are supernatural writer? Do you write about mostly the supernatural or fantasy or you are into more than genre. Pls let me know because i am beginning to like your work.
No.2 I wonder about Eva's parents, a normal parent would devastated but honestly "Not a care in the world" what kind of parents would leave their child there. JUST WHY?
Finally, the plot twist, is the man a ghost or an evil wizard or is like a creepypasta myth. I'm just curious.
Like i said, i'm taking interest in your work so i'm waiting on the next one.
P.S i will check your profile after this

One2Three




vampricone6783 says...


I do write mostly supernatural/fantasy stuff. You can totally check my profile and see if you find any stories that you%u2019d like to read.

I guess you could say that I write horror sometimes, but horror is such a complex genre (in my opinion) that I%u2019m not sure if my work really qualifies as horror. It does have horror themes, but I usually don%u2019t put it under the genre %u201Chorror%u201D.

However, I%u2019ll let you be the judge of that.

I%u2019m glad that you enjoyed. :>



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Sat Jun 15, 2024 9:05 pm
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IcyFlame wrote a review...



Hello again! I feel like I could complete Team Tortoise mostly from reviewing your work, so I'm back for another round!

I like the opening to this in general. Marina being tucked away and almost forgotten tells us a lot about her character already.

so if people wanted to see her, they had to all know how far she was from most of what was there.

I'm not sure I understood this line though. Is it that they need to know she's there otherwise they would miss her?

A tall man in a purple suit with a candle flame for a head stepped out from behind Marina, his orange eyes glowing maliciously. Eva, paralyzed in fear, watched as he reached out towards her, pulling her into the case, scalding her skin, seeping her in terror.

Why wasn’t anyone around to help her and Marina?

The flames that snuffed out her flesh were not natural flames. There was a faint violet tint to them, and it drew blood from Eva’s body, leaving no burn marks, but deep, penetrating cuts in her skin.

This is a good twist, but I'd like to feel more of Eva's fear. It was only on reading this the second or third time that I actually realised she was on fire, I think because it was told in an almost factual way.

Once the man was done, there was no evidence that Eva was ever there at all.

However, if one looked closely at Marina, they would see a young, ghostlike girl next to her, as if the robot were her only friend.

The simple nature of this makes it super creepy! I like that you've posed a lot of questions but not answered them to keep the reader guessing.

See you in the next one!

Icy




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Sat Jun 15, 2024 6:06 pm
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EllieMae wrote a review...



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Hey there friend! I am back! Let's get into the review.

Once again, I love these short short stories you post. For me, very short things are much easier to stay engaged with and I love how you can tell a story so fast. That is definitely a talent that not many people have!! :D

But she was all alone. No one would come to save Marina, the sweet robot who loved to sing. Eva didn’t see any buckets of water anywhere, and the flames were spreading fast, discoloring the cheerful pink of Marina’s exterior into something far more grotesque.

Was there anything she could do?


Oooh, robots this time! Oh no, Marina (once again, lovely names. How do you think of all of these?) is burning up in flames and no one is there to help Eva! What is she going to do?

A tall man in a purple suit with a candle flame for a head stepped out from behind Marina, his orange eyes glowing maliciously. Eva, paralyzed in fear, watched as he reached out towards her, pulling her into the case, scalding her skin, seeping her in terror.

Why wasn’t anyone around to help her and Marina?


Whoa, who is this man? I enjoyed how you asked a couple of questions throughout this story, like "why wasn't anyone around to help her?". These really draw me in and make me start asking my own questions, wanting to know what is about to happen. It is nice when the narrator speaks to us! And you use some cool words here, like 'maliciously' and 'paralyzed with fear'. Oh boy, what will happen to Eva?

Once the man was done, there was no evidence that Eva was ever there at all.

However, if one looked closely at Marina, they would see a young, ghostlike girl next to her, as if the robot were her only friend.


CREEPY ENDING! So this man just leaves and it was as if Eva had never even been there. I wonder what her parents thought when they came out of the theatre? Well, it seems like Eva became a ghost and to this day, she still listens to Marina sing. But is Marina evil? Is it a trap to get people to turn into these ghosts. but why??? I could totally see you writing a part two of this so we can see what happens to marina and Eva... or maybe a new victim. Either way, overall this was quick but awesome! I will be reviewing more soon!

Your friend,
Ellie

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vampricone6783 says...


Thank you so much!!!




Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.
— H. Jackson Brown