Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence and mature content.
She was a forbidden beauty, such as the Garden of Eden.
Eyes as dark and soulless as the empty black hallway,
and skin as deathly pale as the snow that fell silently outside.
The asylum walls closed her in,
crimson blood dripped from her scarred cheeks.
She felt lonely in her little room,
with nothing but a mirror to give a human presence.
She stared menacingly at the distorted reflection in the mirror.
Letting out a blood curdling laugh,
she smashed a fist into the mirror.
The now-shattered mirror,
with all of its cracks,
reflected back her dark, soulless eyes
and her scars that littered her face,
reminding her why she was here in the first place.
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140,474 Literary Works • 673,242 Reviews
I am not really that into this kind of dark and creepy writing but it truly is magnificent. Reminds me of something with Goosebumps and a little Supernatural. Your work is truly wonderful and the way you captivate the appearance of the girl literally sent chills down my spine. You have a wonderful talent and I definitely want to read more from you. Great job, keep on writing!
Hi unluminescent. RainbowOfGayness here.
This poem is amazing. This got me thinking about next Halloween. The "soulless eyes" and "her scars that littered her face" gave me a great visual on what she might have looked like . I especially love the "reminding her why she was here in the first place." This is a great spooky poem. Please write more like this. Stay creepy and happy writing!!!
Hi there, just here to leave a little review!
First off I absolutely love the darkness surrounding this poem...very fitting for Halloween! The last line "reminding her why she was here in the first place" is very clever and perfect for the mood of the rest of the poem. Just a small suggestion... with the line "reflected back her dark soulless eyes" maybe cut out the "back". And also the line "she started menacingly at the distorted reflection in the mirror", I felt, by the way loved the descriptive words, but I felt that maybe that sentence could have been extended a but more and the word "she" could have been cut out so that the line would go maybe along the lines of "Staring menacingly at the distorted reflection in the mirror, she let out a blood curling laugh". Just a tiny suggestion but otherwise you have written a beautiful poem!
Hope to hear more great stuff from you
thank you for your review! I'll definitely take those changes into account
Absolutely beautiful, in fact you were right! It did lift up my Halloween Spirits! I hope you continue more pieces like this, I would love to read them all one day. Again, terrific job.