Me and My Imagination: Chapter 6, A Risky Guest

by tswizzy22

Published March 22, 2017

12+

In Book

I suggested Brooklyn talk to a counselor about her dreams, but she refused, claiming that they would likely stop on their own given enough time. I wasn’t thrilled with her decision, but I figured I had to respect it because it wasn’t my choice to make. As a compromise, she promised to tell me whenever she had another nightmare. For a few days everything was normal, but eventually her dreams returned.

We were both asleep in our separate rooms, across the hall from each other. I was awoken by screams coming from my sister’s room. I glanced at the clock, 3:14. I jolted out of bed, unaware of if I had imagined the screaming or not. I heard my sister scream again, erasing all confusion. I opened to the door to my room and stared at my sister’s door across the hall. I tried to muster all the courage I had before walking into the room.

My sister was sitting in bed, her face and pillow both wet from crying. “Another dream?” I asked. She jumped, as if she hadn’t seen me come in. She nodded, but said nothing. “It must have been a bad one,” I said, noting her appearance. She nodded again. “Do you want to talk about?”

“Not really,” she muttered. “I think I’ll just go back to sleep.”

“Sounds good.” I turned, ready to walk out the door. “You know where I’ll be if you need me.”

“Percy…” she paused. I turned back around to face her. “Maybe, you could sleep in here with me?” Her voice sounded unsteady, as if she was nervous about the request.

“You know that’s not a good idea Brook. Father would kill us if he were to walk in see us in the same bed, the same room even.”

“You can be gone before the morning,” she argued. “Here I’ll set in alarm.” She picked up the clock on her nightstand and began fiddling with it.

“But what if Father comes in before that? I’m sorry I just don’t think we should take any chances with the way things are right now.” She looked at me sternly.

“It’s just a few hours Percy. I’m not going to take no for an answer.” Sensing that this argument was going nowhere, and not wanting to stay up all night, I decided to give in.

“Ok fine, you win,” I replied. “But I’m sleeping on the ground.”

The party was that Saturday, and I awoke with a pit in my stomach. My sister and I stayed in our separate rooms for most of the day as the hired help set everything up downstairs. Around late afternoon I began to get ready. I put on the only suit I owned. Father had bought it for me a few years prior; he told me that this is what men wear. I always hated it because it was so constricting, but I did enjoy looking nice.

Once my suit was on, I walked into my sister’s room to ask if she was ready. I felt my face flush almost immediately. She was wearing a deep blue dress with sequins on it, one that I had never seen her wear before. “You look really nice,” I managed to say. She turned around to face me.

“Thank you.” She smiled. “I was worried that it was too much.”

“Well I do feel like lesser of a person in your presence, but that’s nothing new.” She chuckled. “Did Mother buy that for you?”

“She did. Just last week actually.”

“She certainly does have a way with fashion.” Right on cue, Mother walked into the room.

“My my my don’t you two look lovely,” she said. My sister and I both blushed. “Percy I just wanted to let you know that just because your Father and I have clients over doesn’t mean that this party isn’t totally about you.”

“Thank you.” Her words sounded hollow to me.

“I’ll tell you what, how about the four of us spend a night out on the lake. We could all celebrate as a family.”

“That sounds nice,” I lied.

“Great. I’ll see you two downstairs.” She walked out. Brooklyn made a gagging noise as soon as she was out of earshot, mocking her. We both laughed.

Before our magical family getaway,” she said sarcastically, “we have to make it through this party. How do we want to do this?”

“Well I have all the older kids, including the popular ones. I think it should be pretty easy for me to keep them under control in the entertainment room.”

“What and leave me with a bunch of toddlers outside? I don’t think so,” she said, shaking her head. “If anything, I should get the entertainment room.”

“How about we flip for it,” I suggested, grabbing a coin off of the shelf. “Heads I get the room, tails you do.” She nodded, and I tossed the coin into the air. I caught it and revealed the tails side sticking up.

“Hey cheer up,” she said victoriously, touching my shoulder. “I’m sure everyone will just end up gossiping anyway. You won’t have anything to worry about.

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
rosette
Review
rosette wrote a review Review · Mar 26, 2017

Hi um, I don't know how to pronounce your name, so I'll just stick with swizzy. ;P
Unfortunately, I haven't read any of the previous chapters so there are a couple questions marks bouncing like crazy over my head. But I'll do what I can.

I'm a bit confused about the relationship between Percy and Brooklyn and everyone else in their family. Maybe this has to do with the previous chapters but why would their dad be upset if Percy slept on the floor? And why did Percy blush on seeing his sister right here - Once my suit was on, I walked into my sister’s room to ask if she was ready. I felt my face flush almost immediately. Their whole interaction-thing is a little off, I thought.

Your second phrase in this story had five consecutive phrases beginning with "I". That, my friend, was a little of a problem to me. It sounded choppy and short and dead. Switching up the sentences would help, I believe.

Oh, right, one more thing. (Its not extremely major). I don't see how your title of this chapter fits in with the actual chapter. ? Who's "The Risky Guest"?

Sooo, other than that... your plot and story seem to be building nicely, and this seems to have great potential. I'm really not sure where you're going with this but as of right now, I can say: Great work! ; )
And of course, have a great day,
-TheKid

User avatar
CateRose17
Review
CateRose17 wrote a review Review · Mar 26, 2017

Hey, and Happy Review Day! Your writing style is very sophisticated. Almost like the writing technique you'd find in a book by C.S. Lewis. The relationship between the two main characters is well thought out, solidified and stable. I love that about this piece. The way they interact is just so smooth and lovely. Being that this is the 6th chapter, I really don't know much, but I can most certainly tell that you have a goal for the end of this and you are going for it with such finesse and elegance. I love the idea of dreams too. It adds a level of mystery to it. Every good reader loves a fantastic mystery :).



When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
— Walter Lippmann