Published October 2, 2006
I contemplate the changes life has brought me just in this past year. They're visible I'm sure. But I wonder if I will ever douse this fire that still burns inside me.
Never. Not unless my memory was somehow robbed from me.
Slowly it seems my memory is deteriorating. I'm terrified that someday these memories will be gone.
These memories of you are all I have left. That's all I have for as far back as I can remember. And that's all they'll ever be. Just memories. I can't relive them as much as I try or expect to. I can't go back and change anything. As hard as I try I can't even bring myself to regret you. That's what hurts the most. Even though you are so far gone now I can never rid you from my mind. I can never rid myself of these scars.
Most can say these changes have only brought out the best in me. I'll admit I was a train wreck waiting to happen. But what if...
I hate myself for always allowing you to win. You've dominated me without the slightest effort. Even back then you knew you had control. And you're still an addiction to me. I can't bring myself to hate you. And when I think I might, I blame myself for the mistakes of the past.
It's not who you were. It's what you've become.
I'm not a statistic. Please don't call me a statistic. Because there is too much nobody knows. Nobody knows still.
Do me this one favor darlings and make something of yourselves. Do not wrap yourselves in pretty lies and petty reasons. Love doesn't have to cost you your soul.
You were false. A lie. A disease. And you're still the very complication that brings me to my knees.
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137,476 Literary Works • 672,034 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
First Impression: So this seems to be a pretty subtle written story about some problems that our protagonist has encountered probably by ending up loving someone that completely broke their heart in some horrible fashion. And that idea is conveyed really nicely through the words here with a really smooth flow to the whole story overall.
Anyway let's get right to it,
That is quite a deep thought there to start things off. It definitely is going to grab your attention. So pretty good opening line.
Have you tried contacting Gilderoy Lockhart?
Okay the number of really short paragraphs is kind of high which reduced the impact of a short paragraph somewhat so you might want to think on that a bit to make sure you don't loose the ability to emphasize parts of what you want to be talking about.
Some really nice subtle indicators to this person's past. Its certainly really well done there with unnecessary info dumps being completely avoided like they should be.
Well this is some great emotion that you have shown here to really drive home what sort of miss this person is in.
Aaand some heavy advice there to be ending things on.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: And that's about it for this one. Nothing that I really feel like needs to be improved. It's really well done and the emotions of this person are used really well to tell this story.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
I like it - it's intriguing, in that it opens up just enough to catch our interesst, to want to know a little bit more, without revealing everything.
Although I'm confused about why you used italics for some bits.
Other fiction, perhaps?
This had the chance to be really horribly angsty crap, but you've seem to avoid it, instead going into the mind of someone who was hurt in a somewhat realistic way. For this, I applaud you.
This is not quite a poem but it has a few poetic elements. I did not know where else to put it so I put it here. If someone knows a place more suitable (and knows how to move these things), please let me know.
i luv it, it is awsome it is true too