I placed Joe's tub in her room and looked around. It was the same as it had been in our younger years. The walls were Shrek green, and her chestnut chest of drawers was in the same place it had been. The only thing that had changed was her twin bed had been exchanged for a queen sized bed with a cast iron frame.
“Not much has changed.” Mom said over my shoulder and leaned against the door frame. She was fadingly pretty, and I enjoyed seeing her this way. “I figured Joe would want to organize her own room.” she added, after looking around.
“It's good to be home.” I said, smiling at her. I knew that's what she wanted to hear. And I was happy to be back. I missed the city. Those small towns were about to kill me. Maybe Joe would settle down.
“We've missed y'all.” Mom said. “After y'all were taken, your dad stopped drinking. He felt horrible for what had happened. I know Joe might not forgive him yet, but I hope she does. I hope she forgives us both. We shouldn't have been the way we were back then, but now we're happy again and in love. And we love y'all. All we've done was pray and pray that y'all would want to come back. And I'm so happy God answered my prayers.” she chattered.
I smiled and hugged her again. I knew she wanted the best for us, and I knew that she was so upset that she had hurt us in the past. I could hear it in her voice. She was shattered in the inside. I knew it wasn't an act. Emotions like that weren't an act. Raw emotions like that were unmistakably real.
She held me, and I held her, and in that moment, I felt safe. I felt at home. I felt like I was finally where I belonged, which is where my mom is. I knew Joe would feel the same way eventually, even if it killed her. She would do everything in her own power to make this all work. She was determined to make it happen, even though they had crushed us our entire lives.
“Let's cook supper.” she finally said, letting go of me and walked down the hall to the kitchen. I silently followed her to the battle field of my youth. That's where she and Dad always fought. They threw dishes and knives and food at each other in their rages.
One time I was caught in mid-fire of a flying knife, and Joanna dove to save me, and it went in her arm. She screamed out in pain, but she fixed it herself, saving us both from a pan that had missed our mother.
I shook off the memory, and looked around the brightly lit kitchen. It was so much more welcoming than it had been in my childhood, and I couldn't help but smile a small smile.
“You like meatloaf, don't you Wes?” she asked me, preparing the meat, looking at me with a smile on her face.
“Yes ma'am I do.” I smiled back, “And mashed potatoes.”
She grinned and pulled out the potatoes. “You can peel them then.” she laughed and handed me a potato peeler.
I stuck my tongue out at her, and she laughed. If I had done that when I was a child, she probably would've stabbed me with the potato peeler, but now I felt more open to joking around with my mom. She had loosened up, and she was smiling the same smile I had inherited. I couldn't help but enjoy laughing with her.
“How is Joe taking this move?” she asked me, looking a bit more serious.
“She's slowly accepting it. She's still a bit reluctant.” I said, hesitantly. I didn't want to hurt my mom. She and Joe were the only women in my life that mattered.
“I understand, it's a bit drastic. Your dad and I want to spoil y'all. We want to take y'all shopping tomorrow. Buy y'all some new school clothes and accessories for your rooms. I know it's a bit much, but don't worry, we have plenty of money to spend on y'all.” she said, smiling at me.
“She would love that.” I said, half pleased myself.
I knew coming back was the right idea. Not just because they wanted to spoil us, but because maybe then Joe would learn that they do love us. And I know that the past won't be driven away, but it'll hopefully be healed a bit more than it is.
