I am TITLELESS now.
I have no history.
I just started new.
Where am I?
This is all coming at once.
Hasty writing.
This experience is frightening.
Wishing Tish was here.
Why is she not real?
She may be a monster.
But I need her.
She is mine.
She is not truly evil.
She is capable of LOVE.
She is my TITLE.
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140,223 Literary Works • 673,046 Reviews
Hi null, this is Sherri! Welcome to YWS
The title was interesting, and is part of the reason a clicked on the poem! I liked the idea of the poem, but I was still slightly confused by the end. All I gathered was that there was something/someone new that needed a title, and then there was Tish (a person, I think...?) who became that person/thing's title. If I got any of that wrong, please let me know.
I have basically the same nitpicks as GrapeNerd; each line in your poem is a sentence, and that makes the poem flow a little blocky. I don't know if that makes sense, but there isn't really a better way to explain it. I think if you added variety in punctuation and line structure, this would flow better.
I also suggest adding a bit more detail as of to what/who Trish is and what/who this poem is about; of course, I understand if you want to keep it vague like this. It is your poem, so you can edit--or not--how you please; if a lot of your ideas revolve around keeping it this way, then go for it!
Anyways, this is a nice poem; I can't wait to see what else you write!
Thank you for your feedback!
Hi, and welcome to YWS! I apologize in advance if my review is kind of crappy, I'm kind of scatter-brained as of the moment.
On to the review!
So, let's start with the title. It is, indeed, very interesting, that's why I decided to click on it and read. Though, I didn't really get it.
Next: the content. The very first line captured me and I couldn't stop reading. So this is about a person without a title, right? And then there's this girl named Tish. Who is Tish? It really made me curious as to who she is, urging me to read on. I like how you ended it, it's very simple but had a lot of impact, so good job!
Also, I can't help but notice that each line is a single sentence; I suggest using other punctuations to make your poem run more smoothly. Aside from that, there's nothing else that I find wrong. It's a very good poem. You can be sure that I'll be reading more of your works. Till then, keep writing!
Cheers,
GrapeNerd
Thank you! If things if things go as planned, then you will be seeing much more of Tish in my future works:)
I look forward to it! Also, nice profile picture!
Thank you!