Young Writers Society

Home » Literary works » Poetry » Realistic

Mature Content

death came slow

by mellifera

Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

Is this a review?



User avatar
8 Reviews

Points: 369
Reviews: 8

Thu May 16, 2019 9:19 pm
View Likes
BailorAsh wrote a review...

This is beautiful. Absolutely stunning. The word choice was amazing and the imagery was just... beautiful. That's how I'm going to start this review.

I love reading personifications of Death, mostly because I also enjoy writing Death as a character, and so I like seeing how other people do it. This piece is interesting, because Death is displayed as a sort of cryptic, but wise character. I enjoy this version of Death because they do not seem cruel. My criticism of the piece would be that I don't quite get the ending - I think I do, but I can't say for sure. In poetry, it's good to keep things shorter and focus on description, which you nailed. Your word choice is perfect. One of the best lines is the first:

"what a gluttonous beast,
always consuming, always butchering," I said.

It draws the reader in and shows in very few words the protagonist's view of Death, which I enjoyed. Overall this was beautifully written. I actually cried when I got to the end, so in my opinion, you've written a successful poem. Poetry is about getting your readers to feel something.


There are darknesses in life and there are lights, and you are one of the lights, the light of all lights.
— Bram Stoker