Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.
“I’m telling you, you majesty! We need to act swiftly!”
Here we go again. I was sitting on my throne listening to another one of General Butterscotch’s rants.
“Our trading alliance with the other kingdoms is in jeopardy! The Beastmen Tribal Confederacy is holding back on their corn and meat distribution, demanding more gold from us!” he yelled angrily. With both side on his sides, he continued, “Obviously, the Beastmen are prompting of to declare war! Those filthy animal savages were always bloodthirsty, even back in the beginning of our kingdom!”
Then I responded, having enough of it, “With all do respect, general! We will not jeopardize our trading relationships with the beastmen all from a baseless assertion! For the past 400 years, we of Candytopia have done our best to avoid any hostilities with the other kingdoms, yet you still demand for war!”
“We wouldn’t have to depend on the other kingdoms if you would consider my colonization strategy!” The general countered disrespectfully.
“You know the outside areas are too hostile to send out colonies! Besides, we do not have the means or the manpower to deal with the ravenous beasts roaming the wastes around, outside our boarders!” I corrected him, flashing a stern glare in his direction.
“It wouldn’t be that way if you’d just use…”
Before the general could finish his sentence, I waved a hand to silence him. Why do I bother continuing listening to his rants? The general had always liked to play warmonger. However, unlike his predecessors, the only wars he had ever seen were illustrated in those books he keeps reading.
“Enough! This discussion is over! You will leave my throne room, at once!” I demanded. With that, the general left, albeit begrudgingly, with the rest of his war staff. Then I released a sigh of relief.
I turned and looked at my maid Algida. I asked, “Do I have any more meetings?”
“You have one meeting with he emissary of the Machine Men in the evening. Since it’s about…3:12 in the afternoon, you still have enough time for a tea break,” Algida reminded.
For as long as I’ve known her, she has always had that stone face. Shouldn’t she just lighten up, for once?
“Very well, Algida, a break from sitting on this marble stone would be nice,” I announced enthusiastically, stretching my arms from fatigue. I stood up off of my throne and walked down the steps.
Walking down the halls to the garden, Algida and I kept each other company before we got there.
12-minutes-later, we made it to the garden where the tea was already prepared for Algeda and I. If you think it’s strange for a queen to have tea with her personal maid, then you’d be mistaken. I always enjoyed her company. Ever since we were kids, we’d always had tea parties, despite her chagrin at times.
We opened the door to the patio and were greeted by three other maids who had finished setting up the tea set.
“Once again, you’ all have done a splendid job,” I congratulated the staff. They nodded in thanks from my praise as they bowed.
I ordered politely, “You may be excused now, please.”
After they all left, Algeda and I sat on the two white wooden chairs on each side of the small round table. We faced in front of the scenery, taking a breather at the beautiful view before us as we admired the blooming roses.
My grandmother once told me a story. She said that, long ago, when Candytopia was still young, my ancestor King Cinnamon discovered the garden when he was renovating the castle. He believed that, out of every horror the world had forsaken us, the garden was a sign of hope that life will thrive even in the darkest times.
I was drinking a nice fine chai while Algeda was drinking English breakfast. We never use the same teapot, mostly because we don’t like the same tea. During our teatime, Algeda and I conversed on some personal subjects
“So, what did you think about last night’s celebration? I best it was fun for you,” I asked, looking at my maid with a smug expression.
Algida’s remained stoic. She looked at me and retorted, “I’m not fascinated by such perverse and decadent festivities, your majesty, and neither should you!” her eyes shifted into a glare at the end.
There it was, the judgmental eyes! She always had those, even during childhood. Whenever I did something fun and wild, she would give me those eyes. Sometimes I wonder if she had a 40-foot-poll up her ass. Then again, she would usually stick something similar up that place when she was alone, to herself. I couldn’t help but chuckle at that thought.
Then she continued in a scolding manner, “You’re the queen of Candytopia! I can’t believe you went out there and frivolously profligate in the village with that…human!”
“Oh please, don’t be so subjective! Everyone has his or her own preferences! If I want to be with a human, then I’ll be with a human!” I protested profoundly.
I leaned forward towards her ear. With a sly grin, I whispered, “Besides…I know the kind of preferences you have! Big, strong…chocolate!” then she tensed up. Frozen in place, her stoic expression was dropped and contorted in a gasp.
I giggled gleefully from the look on her face. Before we could proceed, Algeda began to panic.
With a flustered face, she started begging, “P-please, Sugar! Y-you won’t t-tell anyone about what I d-did during the celebration?! I don’t want the r-rest of the staff to think of me so…provocatively!” she always stuttered when she is consternated.
With a wave of my hand, I reassured the maid, “Don’t worry, Algeda! I won’t tell anyone about your tastes!”
“Oh, thank you, my queen! You are so merciful!” Algeda praised with a sign of relief. For the first time in a while, I saw her smiled. Then again, if I did tell the staff, then people will see her as the “fun girl” she really is.
When we finished, we headed back to the throne room. However, I stopped and looked at my reflection in the hallway mirror. My hair was a little frizzy, not from the heated argument, but from the hot air from sitting on the patio. I was also a little sweaty, but not enough to be intolerable to bear. In a short few seconds, I managed to straighten up my hair and adjust the front of my dress before proceeding to the throne room.
I took my seat and waited for another hour, or so, for the emissary to arrive. That means it was going to be a boring while before it shows up. Just then, I stiffed up when the doors flew up. I thought it might’ve been the emissary arriving early, for once but, instead, it wasn’t.
“Akira! Your back! How did you enjoy your stroll? Did you like seeing the rest of the kingdom?” I inquired, albeit ecstatically.
I was happy that he returned to the castle. Seeing him present would be the light of my day. However, I noticed he didn’t seem happy.
He was avoiding eye contact, almost like he was looking guilty. He opened his mouth and answered, “It was okay. I learned a lot more interesting things about Candytopia. But…that’s not why I came back so early.” His voice was somewhat somber.
I could tell wanted to say something to me, and I know it won’t be any good.
“I want to leave Candytopia.”
“W-what?!”
There it was. Without hesitation, he told me his demand. Swallowing the lump that formed in my throat, I questioned in concern, “W-why do you want to leave?! D-do you not…like it here?!” my voice began to stutter, feeling the heartbreaking sensation befalling onto me.
“No, no! I love it here! It’s beautiful but…I don’t want to be cooped up here forever!” he stated reasonably.
Walking closer to the throne, he looked and was taken aback. Probably seeing the anguish in my eyes. Then he added, “I want to go out and see more of what happened to my world! Maybe it will help jog my memory; help me remember why I was put in that pod and what happened to the rest of humanity!”
He waited for my response. I didn’t give him one. Instead, I stood up and stormed out of the throne room, leaving a baffled Akira behind.
Why does it hurt so much?! What is it with me feeling this way?!
Those were the thoughts that circled around my head as I made it to my room. When I stepped in, I jumped and plopped, face first, onto my bed. Tears caressed my face as I sobbed. I could feel myself mascara being ruined, but I didn’t care. All I wanted was the pain to go away.
I heard a knock.
“What is it?!” I yelled rudely.
I turned and look to see Algeda standing by the doorway. She sauntered in and took a seat at the edge of my bed.
“You know you can’t keep him here forever, my queen,” she remarked in a calm, sympathetic tone.
Leaning up, I wiped my eyes on my sleeve before stating, “I know I can’t! I just thought it wouldn’t be this soon!” the sound of dread remained in my voice.
“Your majesty, even if he stayed longer, the urge to venture out into the world will still linger. The only thing we can do is grant him his wish,” She argued with a sigh.
She was right. I had to oblige to what Akira wanted. So, no matter how much I hated it, I needed to grant his wish.
I got up off the bed and was about to return to the throne room. However, before I could even proceed, I was horrified by the state I was in when I looked in the mirror. I told my maid this and all she did was roll her eyes. After I finished freshening up, I returned to the throne room as fast as I could.
I was relieved that Akira was still in the room. I thought he would left and came back later.
“Akira…” I called out softly.
He turned around and smiled. He walked up to me and gingerly placed a hand on my shoulder.
“Hey…are you feeling better?” he asked worryingly.
I nodded in comply.
He then added apologetically, “I’m sorry for springing it up so fast. I know you’ve done so much for me. Releasing me from my prison, taking me in, and…showing me such love, but I can’t stay here anymore.” He let out a sigh of frustration.
From the tone of his voice, I could painful it was for him to get it out. I placed a gentle hand on his. I looked into his eyes with calming ease.
I responded in acceptance, “Akira…I’ll allow you to leave Candytopia. I know I can’t keep you here and you do need to broaden your horizon. I just hope you’ll return, one day.” The pain resurfaced when I spoke. However, I made sure it didn’t show on my face.
Suddenly, I was shocked when Akira hugged me. My cheeks turned red from the sensation. Then he released me and we got ready for his leave. An hour later, I was standing at the entrance of the citadel, watching as Akira waved goodbye to all of us. I had ordered the staff to give him enough supplies to survive in the wasteland, putting it in a rucksack and giving it to him right before he left.
“Are you sure I can’t convince you to stay?” I asked wistfully.
I was still sad. He could see it in my eyes. He shook his head and smiled.
“I’m sorry, but…no. I have to leave and se how the world has changed,” he reassured somberly. Then he started to leave, heading to th gate in a slow pace.
Before he left, he yelled with much enthusiasm, “Goodbye, my queen! I promise to come back and see you, again!”
When he finally left, I turned and headed back to the castle. That’s when I dropped my façade. My same faded into a frown. I wanted to cry so much, but I had to be strong. All I could do was say farewell to you…my love.
Unfortunately, right before I could set foot at the castle’s front door, I was taken aback when a large ship with a triangular body, and two wings on the sides, hovered over as something large dropped out of it. Algeda and I, along with everyone around us, moved as fast as we could to a safe distance. The object made impact to the ground, leaving a large crater in the aftermath. We’ all got closer to it. However, we were surprised to watch the pod transform before our eyes.
It took on a form that stood about twelve feet. Standing on its’ hind legs, the object mad a body that was bulky and oblong-shaped, having a single eye in the center of its’ face. On both sides of its’ body were large arms with three fingers and two rockets on its’ back.
“Scanning! Location: Candytopia! Confirmed!” it analyzed, slowly walking out of the crater and observing its’ surroundings.
Then it looked straight at me and trotted towards me. It stopped. The machine kept staring at me.
I took my stand and didn’t move back. My people, on the other hand, were intimidated by its’ stature. Finally, it spoke to me.
“Identification: queen Sugar of Candytopia! I am Emissary Droid-2289! I am here to discuss your kingdom’s current trade agreement with the Empire of the Machine Men!” the emissary greeted autonomously.
Letting my guard down, I replied, “Very well. We have been expecting you, honorable emissary. Please, step into the palace. We will talk about it inside.” My expression was stoic as I tried to sound as firm and regal as possible.
Algeda and I went inside first. The emissary followed later, unaware that its’ footsteps left large potholes in its’ wake. We’ all went in and prepared our meeting. However, I wasn’t really up to it, anymore. All I could think about what Akira was doing now, and I prayed to the gods he was safe.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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"With both side on his sides", side to hands?
"I have to leave and se how the world has changed" , se to see
"heading to th gate" heading to the gate
"Standing on its’ hind legs, the object mad a body that" mad to made
I liked how this chapter shed some light on Algeda's character. It was funny to see Sugar tease Algeda about it. I'm glad that my wish of Akira leaving to explore was granted. Thank you! This chapter has established that Akira and Sugar do, in fact, have romantic feelings towards each other. Making his departure a sad event for Sugar, who was hoping he'd stay longer.
When the emissary arrived, I thought that it was an enemy that was pursuing Akira and might have posed a threat to Candytopia. So glad that wasn't the case. Great writing! Keep up the good work!
yeah, i wanted to show algeda's wild side and her obvious fetish, but it was too pornographic for this story. so, i'll just turn it into a future one shot.
If you didn't get the reference, the emissary is a nod to the apocalyptic robot uprisings like the terminator and matrix. if you did, then sorry for mentioning it.
Hello!
Okay to start off with the sentence "The general was always liked to play warmonger." Sounds a bit odd. I think that you wanted "was" to be "has". Also watch your past and present tense. You want to keep everything but conversation or thought in the past tense. Otherwise you have a great plot line set in place and I loved the scene with the queen and her maid having afternoon tea. The causal talk and discussion is just as important to a story!
Happy Writing!
-M.
Heya, Kman! Casanova here with another review on your fifth installment of this!
Anyway, straight to it. Your plot is impeccable still, I'm really loving it. However, I do have a couple of things that bugged me about this. One was the random provacadive nature of some of the parts. Here's an example-
This struck me as really odd, especially considering the seriousness before and after this part. It felt oddly placed, as if it should have been somewhere else if at all. Anyway, onward.
The next thing is the amount of time between Akira's meeting with the queen and leaving Candytopia. I thought after Akria had his meeting with the Queen he would get ready for it, but instead there's a big time lapse that we don't get to hear anything about. I felt like that was sort of rushed, and I would like to know what happened in between. And the way the queen just gives in to his request without any form of trying to convince him to stay.. That doesn't really seem like a queen to me, and I thought she would put up more resistance.
Anyway, that's all I have to say on this one, and I hope it helped.
Keep on doing what you're doing, and keep on keeping on.
Sincerely, Matthew Casanova Aaron