My dear beloved,

Have you abandoned this? If not, I'm here to help review. This is a good beginning to a poem and looks like it has a lot of potential, but because it's so short, there's not much I can really do x.x so I hope that I can help as much as I can!

First, let's start with your lines. I think that these would be better off as two lines instead of four. You could merge the first with the second and the third with the forth, and I think it would look and flow a lot better. It would also have a constant ending rhyme scheme, which people (myself included) tend to like and look for when reading poems.

The title of the poem works well so far, and helps to add to the meaning, I think. If the poem is going to be something like a letter, making the lines longer will help to add to the meaning as well, tying back to the first thing I said.

Some good things to have are commas, and this poem could use one or two so far. Commas help to add voice to the poem, to show where you should pause and to separate clauses from one another. Not all poems need commas, but I think this one would benefit from it. Here's an example;

I love you, and wish you knew,

that those are only three

of many words,

I wish to say to you.

This is great. I like the title! It reminds me of Sufi poetry. You should check out Rumi and Hafiz, they have a lot of very romantic poetry. Translations by Coleman Barks are the bomb, but Daniel Ladinsky is another of my favorites. Anyway, to the piece. I honestly don't even know if it needs anything else. This is pretty much to the point. Now, I know if you have other things to say, you should! But just given these four lines it makes sense to me. I have felt this way so many times and I feel this. If you were going to continue, what would you like to say? I can imagine this moving into a description of all the things that you would wish to do and say with the beloved, which would be rather nice. It's a little hard for me to review because I don't know what your ideas are for where it is going, but im pretty sure wherever it is, I like it :3. Let us see when it is done!

Well hello there Katie!
Welcome to YWS.
Hmmm. It is short but I find it fine. You have here your statement which you wanted to tell someone. It was great for you to keep it short and simple as it is.

The fact that you have a lot to say to your beloved and you only wrote the most important one which you want that person to know is a great move. A lot of people say a lot of things which are really not that necessary and it is good to take some time to say the relevant things only.

I was just curious why the title is "love last forever...doesn't it?" and then its content shows a statement which you want your special someone wants to know.

Well, you wrote here a good poem. Keep writing!

~Vibe

Hello, katiemeyers! Nice to meet you! Oh, and just remember, it's good to publish things you think need correcting, because that's what reviews are for! And you should probably change your title, because although it made me click on this poem, it may not do the same thing to other users on this site.

This poem is fairly short, but it's all up to you. So, first thing I'm commenting on, is that I think there should be a "that" between "words" and "I". Also, the first two sentences don't fit in with the rest of the poem. The way you put it together made it sound beautiful, and I'm not saying it sounds bad, but you could make this longer, as I mentioned above, and say more things about this topic. I was disappointed when I discovered there was only this much.

Otherwise, this poem has a really great start, but needs a just as great finish. I think you could do much more to make this poem better, so start editing! It might help!

-wisegirl22