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140,626 Literary Works • 673,567 Reviews
Howdy I'm going to review this for you.
Okay, on first glance, I don't know if this is intended but the layout just looks like it is one sentence. I suggest putting it into something like this:
I think this is exceedingly good. The only thing I'd say is the first set of rhyme just seems a bit forced and doesn't fit with the rest of the poem. I suggest you re-think that.
Other thank that, this is very clever.