choreography: morning trains

This is absolutely beautiful. I usually don't understand poems that scatter (on the page) like this; I guess you could say I don't know a lot about modern literature. However this piece hooked me in immediately.

"the woman beside me is listening to
the same song he once sang for me..."

That line hooked me because I started to identify with that feeling.

"...fingers carving starlight into the lonely
threads of an acoustic goodbye."

This line is just so beautiful. When I read something like that, it makes me wonder what you were thinking to make you come up with something so clever and well-put together.
I enjoyed reading this piece very very much.
Amazing work.

Preposterous! A whole day and no one has review this! I can change that!

I don't know what it is about this piece, but I really like it. I haven't much to complain about, because it's basically perfect, and that's always a good thing.

Maybe it's the format. It gives me a sense of rambling, like the narrator's thoughts are all over the place (kinda like me writing this review). I've always had a weak spot for poems with neat formatting, and maybe that's weird.

Or maybe I love the theme. It's a common theme, loss of love, regret, remorse, thinking of the past, etc. but it brings a new view to it. The setting being a train brought new life to a used concept, and I love when a writer is skilled enough to do that.

So, as I've made clear, I can't pinpoint exactly what I like about this poem, but you did something right, so keep it up! Overall, awesome poem, and I look forward to seeing more of your works in the future!

-Shey