Fire and Ice

I love this poem because when I was little my family didn't tell many myths to me and I took it onto myself to find fariy tales on my own.The story of the two wolves was one of my favorites because it amazed me how they can be so alike yet different.To me this was a great poem and no flaws so good job.

Thanks all of you! I'm reviewing stuff as much as I can, to come out with a VERY short but still good, I think, view on social hierchy.

Jack here for a short review.

For your first non school poem this is great!

I hate doing poems for school and don't but effort in as much. And as I can see here you have but In loads of effort. Good job.

Before I continue I have to say, this poem would make a fantastic book series or something of a sort. This could be like the think you find on the back, personally it would be a awesome super hero book

Brother against sister :0

I would like to try and o through and say my nit-picks, but well there aren't really any!! good job!

Over all I just had to come along and say good job!!

Jack

I'm in love with this poem. I don't see one single flaw in it. I love the way it's written and the fact that it rimes.
Reading the first few lines, I thought about love and how opposites attract, but in the end I though about myself and how I feel like that sometimes. It's beautiful and really relatable.
Thank you so much for sharing such an incredible piece of work! It's your first as I see on your profile? Amazing way to introduce yourself
I really want to read the rest of your works.

I really really like this a lot. Great job! It's a very simple message but you delivered it wonderfully.

I especially love your use of rhymes. Like a comment below mine I love when you rhymed "other" with "brother" it just was a perfect rhyme for the end of the poem. I also love your "eternal combat" line. if you couldn't already tell, the ending was my favorite part. Very good theme. keep writing!

I've been reading poems all day and this one is definitely my favorite. I think it's very clever and well structured......plus it rhymes! That is something that I thought I'd see more of.

I like that your view of fire and ice is that they are equals. You view them as brother and sister and aren't biased. I'm glad you don't seem to view fire as danger and water as healing, I suppose both can be dangerous or healing depending on the situation.

"We are both fire and ice inside." That line stood out to me and I wasn't quite sure what you meant by that. Do you mean we argue with ourselves the way fire and ice battle? An inner combat?

Regardless, I very much enjoyed your poem. Thanks for sharing!

This is pretty interesting. It made me think about life for a moment. Anyways, your rhymes are really good. My favorite was other and brother.

I just have one thing to ask. You say "how these two opposites attract", but fire and ice do not attract each other, at least as far as I know. Fire and ice both occur under pretty specific conditions. They are not sentient things, although you describe them as such in your poem.

However, I'm not going to harp on that too much because that particular idea is sort of the key to your poem, and as I said, the poem is awesome.

As soon as I saw your poem in the literary works section, I had to click it. I LOVE ice. There are too many fire lovers (or pyros) in my opinion. Anyways, your poem was great! It was quick, straight and to the point, and also exhibited a high degree of thought. Keep on writing, because you can make hundreds of great poems like these!

This is really cool. This is the first time i am realize about this after reading your literary work.
I also think so that both fire and ice is a cool thing in the universe as they are opposite each other.I have always wondered about this two major unworldly elements. Even now we the people of the world and all other animal depending on Fire and Ice. People cant live without Fire and Ice, some other Animal cant live with out ICE. I think both are like brother and sister.


Thanks for sharing this good work

Regarded by

zazafee

I found this to be quite interesting. Reminds me of yin and yang, and other forces that balance each other out in the world. On one hand I might say it's a topic that is written about quite often, but you add an interesting twist by including people in it. I think it would be very interesting to see emotion added more into this. Make us see what you are imagining. What i do like about this is the punctuation. It feels clean. The repetition however, I am not quite a fan of. Repetition is fine, but it should be throughout the whole poem, not just randomly repeated lines which makes this a slight bit awkward. The end might also be a little rushed. It's a good poem with lots of potential! Give it the ending that it deserves

Thanks for sharing and welcome to YWS!
*the grey reality

Ooh ooh. Almost forgot. This might look better split into stanzas as the flow has some obvious pauses in it...at least when I read it.

Bye now!

Hi!,
I really like where this is going, how fire and ice are opposites but some how come together in the end. I don't really understand how the poem travels from your fascination with fire an ice to an explanation of it. I finished this poem feeling... a little empty, like there's is something lacking, but I can't put my finger on it. Maybe go in more in depth on the characteristics of fire and ice. With a little elbow grease i think this will be a fantastic piece of work! Thanks for the read!
xoxo,
Rascalover

I want criticism! It builds character! I won't take offense at anything said here. This is my first non-school-assigned poem. Please enjoy!