Solstice- Chapter 1- The Last Abnormality

Valerie was never afraid of the dark.

She prowled in the night like a starving wolf, looking for any sign of prey or someone else’s kill. She would listen to the songs of an owl, ghostly melodies that seemed to come from somewhere other than earth, and listen to the beat of the crickets as they rubbed their legs in perfect harmony. She would be a dangerous hunter, but she would only pretend to be someone who killed.

Valerie never followed the north star, for farther north she would be met with nothing but ice caps and a barren land. Instead, she followed seahawks to the west where she would find the river, or be guided by the ravens to the east, where mountainous land was lush and unexplored.

But Valerie had to wake up.

And she had forgotten she was afraid of the dark.

The plants in her window created shadows that looked like unworldly beasts, and the various chairs around her looked like they were about to eat her alive. Her face was entangled in her hair, which she was unable to escape from, but her bed covers seemed to suffocate her if she ever went deeper into them. She stayed frozen and impossibly tired as she scanned her room for danger.

In the corner of her room was the silhouette of a person.

Valerie sucked in a gasp. Quickly, she slid deeper into her covers, attempting not to suffocate from the hot, dry air underneath. What was once dark was now pitch black as she was covered by her covers, about to pass out from such a terrible experience.

The person crept closer to her with loud, raspy breathing. It was rythmic, and that made it all the more terrifying. It was as if it had planned all of this.

This isn’t how Valerie wanted to die.

A lantern was lit. Valerie a quiet, trembling breath. She peeled her covers away.

She was alive.

The princess sat up and stared at the person in front of her. An older woman with pale, red hair and a twinkle in her eye laced her hands together as Valerie woke up. She wore a plain, pink dress that Valerie had seen time and time again.

“My lady,” the woman spoke. Valerie groaned and laid her head back down.

“Don’t make me wake up, Rose,” Valerie growled. “I command you not to.”

Rose smiled and sat down on the end of Valerie’s bed.

“It’s a shame that I have higher orders from the King, then. Shall I go arouse him and tell him you’re not fit to wake up?”

Valerie’s eyes shot open as she sat up. She patted down her poofy brown hair and looked away from Rose, towards the window.

“I suppose not. I don’t want either of us executed today.”

Rose’s mouth parted, unsure of how to reply to Valerie’s comment. The princess looked back at her and smiled.

“Go find me a dress, Rose. You look hideous when you’re just sitting and gawking at me.”

Rose stood up and headed to a set of mint-green doors before slipping inside them. Valerie let out a breath.

This morning’s been better than I thought.

Valerie stood up and smoothed out her nightgown. She headed to a pitcher on her windowsill, watering her plants. She had a large assortment of flowers, some of them thorny and prepared for the wild, and others delicate and soft. One such flower, a blossom with delicate pink petals and a ray of hope that seemed to radiate from it, grew far away from the cluster inside of its pot. Valerie crushed it with her hand and tore off its stem, throwing it to the ground. She sighed and continued watering.

Rose walked out of the mint doors with an assortment of skirts in hand. Valerie removed her nightgown and stood in a t-pose as Rose silently tied on a hoop skirt and the following layers.

“You seem quiet,” Valerie said.

Rose looked up at Valerie but stayed quiet. Finally, she let out a laugh.

“It’s only natural to be quiet on such a day, my lady,” she replied. “I simply don’t have any words for you.”

Valerie tilted her head as her brows furrowed.

“And why is that?”

Rose tied off the last skirt, one of a dark teal color and made of satin, with gold poking out underneath. She rushed and grabbed a stomacher covered in golden bows she set on Valerie’s bed.

“Everything I say makes it harder to say goodbye. It’s safer to be quiet.”

Valerie scowled.

“What do you mean, say goodbye? My father is already so secretive, and now you? I demand an explanation at once before I banish you from this castle!”

Rose tied on the stomacher. Valerie let out a wheeze.

“You and I both know you don’t have such power,” Rose said.

Valerie sucked in a breath. She bit her lip and stayed quiet. Rose added the sleeves on, adjusting them with her delicate fingers, and smiled.

“You look beautiful.”

The princess smiled. She knew Rose was the only one who thought so.

Rose ran a brush through the princess’ hair and applied a thin layer of blush. She painted her lips cherry red and quickly walked away before she could see Valerie’s scowl.

“This is stupid,” she growled. “I look like a baboon.”

“You’re a very pretty baboon.”

“However much I love you, Rose, I find your sugarcoating completely and utterly ludicrous.” Valerie held her chin up and glared down at Rose’s short, weak stature. The poor woman was smaller than a Florere mouse, but her face somehow looked like it had been pulled from a ram goat, ready to snap back at any of Valerie’s comments. It was the only reason Valerie never felt remorse for picking on the old woman.

Rose squeezed Valerie’s shoulders and pulled her into a hug. Valerie could smell her vintage rose hip perfume mixed with a bit of mildew. Despite the hint of such a hideous smell, Valerie still found it beautiful. She squeezed Rose’s shoulders, smiled and pulled away.

“You must promise me a few things,” Rose whispered.

Valerie tilted her head.

“And those things would be?”

“Don’t get mad. Don’t get jealous. Keep working hard,” she said, sucking in a breath, “and most importantly, look at others before you look at yourself.”

“You’re talking very strangely,” Valerie chuckled, a hint of nervousness in her tone. “What on earth was that cryptic warning for?”

“You promise to do these things?” Rose asked, ignoring Valerie’s question. Valerie held tightly to her smile, trying not to let it fade away with worry.

My servant has officially gone crazy. I was expecting it, but not this soon.

“Of course. Of course, I’ll promise these things for you.” She picked up the skirt of her dress and headed towards the door.

“I’m guessing a banquet occurs in about ten minutes?”

“Precisely. You woke up late.”

Valerie nodded and headed out the door. She could hear Rose calling her name, urging her back, perhaps telling her some soppy speech about how she always felt like Valerie’s mother. But there wasn’t time for that.

Valerie didn’t want there to be.

***

Sweet rosemary fragrance and the rich smell of lamb shank filled the air. Guests from all across Lustreia had filed one by one to a table filled with delectable first courses and to no surprise, Valerie was listed as the host, greeting people by the door and painfully watching as her own plate turned cold.

“Starcrest,” Valerie swore under her breath, dipping for a curtsy to the young man in front of her. He gave her a sly smile and bowed towards her.

“Frustrated?” he asked. Valerie glared at him. He grinned.

“I suppose even being crown princess has its downsides,” he shrugged. “Shall I save you a seat at the table?”

Valerie looked away from him.

“Leave me be, peasantry.”

And just like that, her one chance of friendship was gone.

Valerie sucked in a breath and bowed towards the young woman in front of her, who quickly rushed away after her conversation with the young man. The princess sighed and made her way to the table, which was covered in delicious plates and a whole pig in the center. Her mouth watered at her own plate, where a delicious meal of Coq au vin sat. She grabbed her fork after her father said a few words across the table and dug in. She tuned out every conversation from the girls in front of her, which mainly consisted of frilly tea parties and crushes on the Lords she hadn’t met yet. If they asked her a question she simply nodded and said yes, which either resulted in polite giggling or gasps of absolute dismay. Valerie couldn’t help but smile at their reactions.

“Princess,” a voice asked. Valerie looked up and saw the young man from before. She frowned.

“I know you want to be left alone and whatnot, but I can’t help but find you ravishing.”

“That’s your problem, I’m afraid. Good luck with that.” She looked down at her food and shoved more chicken in her mouth.

The man chuckled, a deep, dark chuckle that made Valerie’s bones groan with fear, and leaned over to grab her hand. She froze, unable to pull away.

“All the other couples have left,” he said, standing up from his chair. “Would you like to come with me and dance?”

Valerie pulled her hand away.

“I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I have to get going.”

“You just got here!” he scowled, reaching for her hand again.

“Get away from me before I call a guard,” she hissed. She looked up at her father, his eyes cold and black, before pushing the golden doors of the dining hall open and running up the stairs.

Valerie had traveled three flights before she opened the doors to her room and collapsed on her bed. Rose was standing by her vanity, dusting off its golden edges.

“I suppose the banquet went well?” she asked, not looking up from where she stood. Valerie just let out a heavy sigh.

“Ah, I’m sure you’ll make friends next time,” Rose smiled.

“You don’t understand, Rose. Some dimwitted bonehead of a man-”

“See, this is why you don’t have a courter yet,” Rose said. “You’re incredibly harsh.”

“Harsh is what keeps me alive and happy. And I don’t want to be courted.” Valerie cast Rose the meanest look she could.

“If I wanted to be courted I could do so with the snap of my finger.”

“And that’s the other thing, my lady- you have such pride.”

“Have you ever met someone royal who wasn’t proud?”

Rose thought for a second, looking up at the forest through the window.

“No- but it would be nice.”

“I won’t even get married. Then, I can find some kind-hearted young man in poverty and claim him as my heir- and you can finally see a ruler who never had pride.”

“My lady, don’t you find that plan a bit pre-”

The door busted open. Valerie’s blood began to pump twice as fast.

Standing in the doorway was an old man. His dark, auburn beard was grey at its roots, his eyes pale and black, and his dark blue coat adorned with various medals shaped like the moon and stars. His face seemed frozen in a permanent scowl as he sauntered over towards Valerie and sat on the edge of her bed.

“Rose,” he said, not looking away from Valerie. “You are dismissed.”

Rose dropped her duster on the vanity and rushed out the door, slamming it behind her.

Valerie held up her chin and stared her father in the eyes.

“Before you ask, I don’t know what I’ve done wrong,” she hissed. Her father frowned even more.

“You know what you’ve done wrong,” he whispered. Valerie scooted farther away and sat against her pillows.

“I’m afraid I don’t. So please, enlighten me.” She bit her lip, praying he didn’t hear the sarcasm in her tone.

But he did.

The King raised up a trembling arm and slapped Valerie on her cheek. She hit the backboard of her bed, her thoughts seeming to go blank as an intense headache hit her. Her skin turned red. She felt around for any loose teeth before looking at her father.

“I’m not hurt yet,” she said coolly. “Why don’t you do it again?”

Her father then formed his hand into a fist and punched her chin.

Clllick.

Valerie’s shifting jaw was set back into place with a sharp pain at the joint. She let out a sigh and nodded.

“I feel it now. But what did I do?”

Her father looked away towards the window, absentmindedly, before looking back at Valerie.

“The young man.”

“The one who sat beside me?”

He nodded. “He was going to be your courter. You could have married, had children-”

“Live the life I never wanted,” she interrupted, finishing his sentence. She watched both of his hands curl into fists, but they didn’t leave his sides.

“If you wish to have any purpose in this home, you’ll be married, Valerie. It’s what any young lady does. It doesn’t particularly help that you’re incredibly cold to our guests.”

“Like father, like daughter.”

She stared him in the eyes without a hint of emotion.

“I’m very disappointed in you, Valerie.”

There it was- he said it. The closest he could get to any sort of feeling towards her, and all it was was just a dull sadness, with no thought behind it. Valerie had thought about all of the people in the world with enraged fathers who screamed in their faces and ran around like a provoked bull- the ones who threw themselves on the ground before they could be forcefully hurt. And all Valerie could think about was how maybe- just maybe- that’s what she wanted.

An enraged father who cared too much.

“Why don’t you just yell at me?” she growled, sitting up straighter so she could better meet his gaze. “Why can’t you tell me you’re mad? Why can’t you just show me how enraged you are? Why do you act like such a downcast little toddler that can’t even seem to look his own daughter in-”

“You know I can’t get mad at you, Valerie,” he sighed. He looked out the window again. She cocked her head, choking away tears.

“Why?”

“You can’t get mad at someone you never had hope in.” He looked back at her with a hint of a smile.

“Maybe how I treat you is all you ever were; a disappointment.”

Valerie held her breath. She bit her tongue until she thought it would bleed. She wanted to run away and never return, to live in her dream where the only thing she followed were the calls of owls. She wanted to survive off the earth and not the riches she inherited. She wanted everything except her father.

But she was stuck with him.

He pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to her- a worn piece of paper that looked like it had sat in there for five years.

“Goodbye, Princess Valerie.”

She didn’t have the heart to yell at him and tell him he was the lowliest thing she had ever seen on that earth. She didn’t have the heart to do anything.

She took the paper from his gentle grip and set it on her lap, watching as he headed out the door. He stood for a moment before glancing back in her direction- still unable to meet her eyes.

“You will leave for the Lakes of Luster at seven. Pack your bags.”

He closed the door.

Valerie sat in silence. Her breathing slowed.

“A disappointment”, she repeated his phrase slower, enunciating the vowels like she was speaking to a child.

Is that all I am?