Shaping
“Just hand me that towel, will you?”
“What, a Selkin afraid of water?”
Playfully, Merryn splashed her cousin across his sleek back.
Cei held up both hands. Clambering from the lukewarm pool, he scooped up a lilac towel. His nostrils flared.
“What is it?”
“I smell others coming-- humans.” Cei’s dark skin took on a flush. “Get over by the side of the pool.”
She mouthed “But” at him.
Before he could say anything, three human teenagers burst into the room. Their leader smirked.
“It seems we have a couple of freaks in here.” He gestured to his minions to spread out. “This’ll be fun.”
Merryn bit her lip. No way was she letting her near-brother face these louts by himself! Her muscles clenched, and she bared her teeth at them.
The pack was on them! With a bound she submerged. She saw fear on the humans’ faces as they looked for her.
Whoosh! Water splashed everywhere. She barreled into the leader’s chest, knocking him back several steps.
He gaped at her.
“Let’s go, Cei!”
They scrambled out of the bathing area and into full sunlight. Various passers-by gaped at them: what appeared to be two muscular teens, both wearing nothing but swimming trunks.
Maybe we ought to, you know...?
Good idea.
She “changed” so that nothing was showing up top. Not that the good citizens would stare, exactly... Merryn snorted ironically. Okay, I’m a shape-shifting freak. What else is new?
They high-tailed it to their quarters.
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139,329 Literary Works • 672,537 Reviews
Hi Fire!
What's up? So, this story. I didn't really like it. Even though it's really short, there isn't much that goes on within this story. Two [I don't even know what they are] are playing in a pool, humans come, and then they leave. I don't get why the humans seem like they're so evil anyway. They just came and said, "this should be fun" which could mean any number of things. Maybe you could have the humans start to actually do whatever they're going to do so that your characters have more reason to act the way that they act.
Secondly, there isn't really much to the story. It's just an event, and event that could happen frequently. You haven't really done anything to make us care. Where's the conflict? Maybe if they had a harder time escaping, it would be good, but they're just able to slip right by. There's really nothing exciting or memorable to note for this story. Whoever asked you to continue this, I agree with them. You've created an interesting world and characters that I want to know more about.
Hope this helps! Good luck revising, and PM me if you have any questions.
-Elinor xo
I don't know yet.
Is this to be continued?
Ohh. Interesting, yet it's short... But it's good. There could be a little more detail in this though... But other than that, *gives thumbs up*. Keep writing. I would love to read more. There are a few minor spelling mistakes that are easily fixed... Still, it was enteraining, if a bit short. (I said that before, didn't I?) Anyway, good job so far.
Scarlett.