"A name." I've pace till my paws ache thinking about it. I don't know how it's done!
Thinking of other names-- and some in particular-- doesn't help.
"No good," I mutter. Perhaps if I took a walk. Clear the mind.
I leave the den and run slapbang into-- Mia. Thank goodness!
"Oh, Seven! I'm sorry; I thought you'd be resting." Eyes shining, she goes
on, "This used to be my den. Then I learned I'd have kittens, so I moved."
I smile. She reminds me so much of someone. My own sister, maybe?
"Well, I think you can help."
"Go on."
"Mothers name their kittens, right?"
She nods.
"Well, I need a name, besides just Seven."
"I don't understand. It's a good name."
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139,331 Literary Works • 672,537 Reviews
Wonderful! Such a unique style. Other than what tRiCK pointed out, I think thatyou've got a wonderful story started.
Though short, its got me very interested. I really like your style of writing. At first, I was thinking: "Wow this is weird" but it must be you signature style. Its great to read something unique. Refreshing.
The only other comment I have is that in your second sentence, the "I've" doesn't sound right.
Well, thanks for sharing your story.
Trick