I see the Lady 'Midst the Woods
I have no words to say
Awed at her beauty and gracefulness
In the wind her hair does sway
Faerea Woods is truly blessed
To have a queen like she
An elfin face, with an elfin grace
Her clear voice rings melodiously
The Perstar River, silver waters
Said to have been the home of she
She may have been an elf or nymph
Or perhaps a tiny, delicate fairy
Here will I end, I end my song
Do not weep, my readers, so
I will write much, much, more
Review on the comment section below.
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,804 Reviews
hey. prithamrittika is here for a review. the poem is very nice. you showed the beauty of fairy's. the starting of the poem is beautiful.
"i see the lady midst the wood
i have no words to say
awed at her beauty and gracefulness
in the wind her hair does Sawy"
these lines are really very beautiful. i like the meanings of the lines. but one thing i don't understand, in the starting you told about fairy but in the last line you told about review. if you only told about fairy's the poem would be more nice. so keep writing....... c:
Hi. I'm Maddie and I'll be reviewing your work.
I haven't reviewed much poetry at all, actually. I usually just avoid it because I'm more of a proser than a poet. So in that case, sorry if I don't
I weesh, I weesh, I had a quiche. - Brown Rat Creature. That is pretty much the only thing I can think of with this. That's the kind of poetry this is, right? (I hope so, heh.)
Well, it flowed nicely and the title caught me right quick.
The rhymes, at least to me, didn't feel forced and kept the same air to them.
I've only learned of the word "elfin" a week ago actually, and the word fits the mystic mood of the poem. Though I'd avoid using it twice in the same sentence. It wouldn't bode well in prose unless it was justified.
Though I do have to get on the topic of the difference in subjects and how this poem seemed mighty jumpy. I'll just go on a minor summary of the stanzas.
Stanza 1: A view of the Queen
Stanza 2: How the Woods is lucky to have a queen as beautiful as her.
Stanza 3:How the river could be her home
Stanza 4: Review me, please.
Well, it's safe to assume that Stanza four is a joke, so I could take that one out.
But, there's no connection between eyes, woods, and rivers. Try and add a bit of things that are the same in there. Like how the woods could be home to the river or something. So yeah, that's all I wanted to say.
Make things a bit smoother, and keep writing! (much, much, more. XD)
Maddie out!
Hey.
And your last stanza haha. No technical errors as such but why don't you take this a bit seriously and write more?
Okay so, you came up with something different, good job
It's just a suggestion to extend it a bit and add more to this. It would really become something awesome, honestly. Try doing so once, it'll be quite great. Secondly, I think the concept is sort of haywire, my mind got easily diverted and it shouldn't be like that. It should be completely written in a way that the readers get engrossed.
Good work.
Keep writing and stay blessed.
xoxo