Gently in my hour of sleep,
a lonely woman sings.
She holds my hand and while the other
caress my face like any mother.
She tells me of her bitter life
that had been sweetened by agonies.
I asked, what made it bittersweet?
Then she spoke to me in melodies.
"As life lasts decades,
you see life distorted
to the easiest degree.
But I say it is wisdom that grows strong
So this rule just clings to me like a grapevine:
Stop worrying what goes wrong,
and just sing a little song,
everything is going to be just fine."
slowly, as my eyes went cold
her wrinkled hands gave way
they vanish from my memory
but never what she had to say
and when i woke, i felt up tears
That carried my fears away
And I stood ready
To fight for another day
A little less afraid.
Just because of a tip for little children.
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Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Hello! This was a beautiful poem! I can tell from reading this poem that your grandmother must have been very loving and sweet. Personally, I think that it was a great choice to in a way, embody your grandmother into this work of art.
The flow is constant and helps to make the concept easier to understand. Also, as someone who is very well read (and hoping to be published) I can see the love and care that you put into this.
Over all, I praise your writing skills and hope to soon read more of your works. Keep up the good work!
Hi. This is Kman134. I'm here to review your work.
I am sorry for your loss. Your grandmother sounded like a wonderful woman and loved her life without any regret before her passing. There is a lot of love and sorrow within your poem. I could tell you took a lot of time and through in writing it all down. the symbolisms of life and death are embedded pretty well within the stanzas.
"As life lasts decades,
you see life distorted
to the easiest degree.
But I say it is wisdom that grows strong
So this rule just clings to me like a grapevine:
Stop worrying what goes wrong,
and just sing a little song,
everything is going to be just fine."
This was my favorite part of the poem. the metaphors I see such as knowledge and acceptance are nicely done. Your grandmother's advice really tugs at the heartstrings. She teaches you to not dwell on the past and just keep moving forward. nothing lasts forever and it is better to accept the things you cannot change and merely learn from what you experience.
Anyways, you are a really good writer. I hope to read more of your work.