Such a great poem! I really like the theme of it. However, I did see a few flaws in it. Don't worry, it happens to the best of us. I am just here to read your work, write a review, and (hopefully) help you progress as a writer!
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1) Title & Description
Before I clicked on this literary work, I noticed two things. First of all, a lowercase letter is missing. In a title, almost everything but the sight words are capitalized. "To" is a sight word and should be lowercase in your title, instead of uppercase.
Another thing that I would like to point out is the description of the poem. Is it an abbreviation for something? Did you accidentally type something else other than a certain word? The description is ment to make the reader exited to read your poem, kind of like the little "summary" on the back of a book. It shouldn't make the reader confused. It's okay though. We've all done it at some point in our lives.
2) Capitalisation
You don't seem to use much capitalization in your poetry, and of course I'm not an expert, but I think that yours could use some. Like I said, I'm not an expert, so here's a link to something someone else wrote:
Capitalization in Poetry
3) Layout
In my opinion, layout is very important, especially in poetry. Towards the last stanza, you put a little "~" This is perfectly fine with me, but if I were you, I'd use that in every stanza. You don't have to, though I just think it looks nicer.
4) Rhythm
A poem is ment to have a rhythm, and, I can't spot one in this poem. Maybe, work on this a little?
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That's it! I didn't get too into detail in this review I I would've liked to, but I need to go now. I think you could tell, since I kind of rushed the last bits, haha. I can't wait to see more of literary work!
-@SuperOriginalName
Points: 617
Reviews: 16
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