CHAPTER 2
Exhausted, Myka self-consciously put one foot in front of the other, she was almost home. Only a mile or more until she would come to the small wooden cabin that served as a place of belonging for her and her uncle, where she knew she would always be safe. The cold air sent a chill down Myka’s spine, winter was approaching fast, and she was very thankful for the doe she had shot, an hour or two after the sun had come up that morning.Myka’s feet were numb from the cold and she was seriously contemplating on bringing her horse Shadow, a chestnut brown half war horse, half quarter horse, hunting next time. Even though he spooked easily, it would be much faster and easier if he came along.Glancing at the sky that was hiding behind the thick layer of snow clouds, she sighed, if she didn’t move the snow would start falling before she made it to the cabin.
She could have made it home before the tiny white flakes of snow had decided to descend on her in a wild swirl of white, if she didn’t have the full pack of butchered deer, weighing her down.The only thing she could see is the outline of the cabin she shared with her uncle, she could almost feel the warmth of the fire and hear it crackling, maybe, if she is lucky she will even be able to have a cup of freshly brewed coffee. She quickened her step until she was practically running and only slowed when she reached the cabin door.Pushing the door open she stepped inside. A rush of heat hit her as she closed the door behind her, she smiled, a small fire was blazing in the fire place and her uncle sat on a chair at the table drinking coffee and reading through review reports. He glanced up and smiled
“Good hunting?” he asked as he scratched his black beard, that looked like it hadn’t been shaven in days, with his right hand while held his papers down so they didn’t blow away, when she opened the door with the other hand. Myka smiled back and dropped the pack of meat on the floor lightly
“Yes Uncle Cain” she replied. Then undressed and made her way to the coffee pot on the stove.She heard a soft grunt from behind her
“You go for the coffee before you come give your uncle a hug?” Cain asked in playful disbelief.Myka laughed
“Coffee is the most important thing” she teased then took a gulp of the delicious black drink, from her mug. “Ah, that hit the spot” she said as she walked over to the table. Sitting down on the chair across from him she glanced at the papers he was going through.
“Damn that man!” Cain suddenly burst after a few minutes of going through some papers. Myka glanced up at him
“What’s wrong?” she asked. Her uncle sighed before replying in an exasperated tone
“Oh it’s just that damn Mathew Skiver; he threatened Ranger Saxon again! Well if Saxon wasn’t such a blockhead! Well last week when Saxon tried to tell Mathew to pay for that land he had bought from Luke Mignath last year, or else he would be forced to arrest him, Mathew threatened Saxon of his land. Now its up to me to handle everything,” Cain sighed and rubbed his temple with his fingers. Cain was the king’s highest Ranger so he got the brunt of the paperwork and quarrels.Feeling tired and sore all over Myka, retired early to her bed, she needed sleep and lots of rest. Unfortunately that was not what she had.
****
“Come my child” a soft male voice said. His voice was familiar and it warmed Myka whenever he spoke. She followed the sound of the voice to a pitch black alleyway, small enough that one person could walk through with room to spare but two would be a little squishy.
“Your almost there my child” the voice [M1] “Just a little further.” Myka had a feeling he was talking about a little more than just getting to him. After walking through the small alleyway that twist and turned so much it made her head spin, Myka stumbled on a loose rock and found herself on her hands and knees. Her hands felt raw, and she oddly smelt a whiff of blood.
“It’s alright my child just stand up” the voice crooned softly.Myka felt tears stream down her face, her hands were in so much pain, and with the fall her ankle had twisted.
“I…I can’t” she cried out, “Help me!” she yelled. Pain flooded through her, and not a bone in her body was free of it, it was like a lightning bolt going through her veins. “Help me!” she screamed again.
“I am sorry my child, I can’t” the voice sounded sorrowful “You and you alone must fight this” the voice said softly. Part of Myka wanted to tear the man to shreds, but another part of her loved him and never wanted to hurt him.
“Pl-please” she choked as another spasm of pain streamed through her, more painful than the last. She felt her strength draining wildly and she didn’t think she could survive another spasm. Struggling to stand up, an invisible force pushed her back down and she hit the rock again.Her lips were cracked and blood was flowing freely from them and dripping into her mouth.
“I must go my child, time is running short. We will meet someday, but the time is not right yet, but when we do meet I will make all this up to you” the voice said with sorrow.
“No!” she cried out “Stay with me I don’t want to be alone!” But it was too late, she felt the tingling sensation of magic, which on top of her pain made all her cuts itchy.A thin gray mist rose around her and another painful spasm ran through her body, before she awoke.
****
Myka awoke in her bed drenched in sweat, her blanket lay crumpled on the floor and her pillow was torn in half. Her breath came in gasps and her whole body was shaking.She checked herself for cuts but there were none.
“It was just a dream” she reminded herself, although deep down she knew it was more than just that. Picking her blanket up of the floor she wrapped herself in it, and rocked back and forth trying to shake the voice out of her head. The voice was so soft and beautiful, but full of anger and hate, making Myka want to love and comfort it, but hate it at the same time. Myka’s eyes drooped tiredly and she jerked them awake, she didn’t want to fall asleep for fear she might fall back into the same dream. Eventually however, sleep crept up on her like a panther, and claimed her. Her dreams were more pleasant this time, so she slept in peace.
***
Myka slowly opened her eyes, the sun streamed through her window like a sparkling glass slide, but its beauty was crushed by the memory of last night. Even though she tried her best to block the sound of the voice out of her mind, it still remained. Knowing she had better get up, Myka pushed her blankets off her upper body and the swung her legs out from under the blankets, landing them on the cold hard wooden floor. Shivering Myka rubbed the sleep from her eyes and walked, as fast as her still half asleep body would take her, over to the small dresser in the corner of her room. She pulled out a short brown tunic that reached to her knees, and a pair of warm gray stockings, and started to dress for the day. Glancing out the window she saw a foot or more of snow on the ground from last night’s snowfall, but with sun made the day look quite promising. As she had just finished dressing she heard her uncle yell from the kitchen
“Myka, if you want to come with me to do the check-ups you better get up” he said “I don’t know if this means anything to you but the gypsies just set up camp in Rivercross” he added a little to casually. Rivercross was the town her uncle had to take charge of, like doing his regular weekly “check-ups” on them. Every Ranger had a different town to cover, which included the farms around it, and Rivercross was his, it was only three quarters of an hour to an hour away from where they lived.Myka’s heart raced, how could she have forgotten about the gypsies? The gypsies came once a year, with their caravans, usually just before the snow hits so everyone gets a chance to get out before they get cooped up in there cabins for another season, but this time the snow came a bit early. The week the gypsies would stay in town, everyone had a national holiday. The men of the families would get the chance to get a pint of beer at the local bar with one another, and catch up on all the news. Usually ending their days with their wives pulling them out of the bar, when they had too much to drink. The woman also anticipated the gypsies coming, for they could visit each other before the snow, and get the chance to spend their husband’s money on the gypsy’s wares, for stuff they either needed or wanted. And the children had the most fun, every child waited impatiently for the gypsies arrival. For the gypsies each year put on much entertainment, and each year different from the last year’s entertainment.Children’s dreams became filled with puppet shows and bags of goodies, in the months before the gypsy’s arrival.For Myka, the gypsy’s caravan was a place of wonder, where she could hear the dark stories of the world being told in such a breathtaking way.
Sprinting out of her room Myka made her way to the kitchen, her uncle sat where he was the night before with the same papers around him, and a cup of coffee in his hand. Secretly Myka wondered from the circles under his eyes, if he had stayed up all night reading more reports. Her eyes moved onto the small cooking stove that was tucked in the corner, on it was a coffee pot, and a frying pan that contained scrambled eggs, two toast, and a few pieces of perfectly crispy bacon. Even though it all looked so delicious she just wanted to skip breakfast and head into town, suddenly she felt childish. She already knew her uncle wouldn’t let her leave the house without eating anyways, she fought back the question forming in her mind and made her way to the stove.
“Good morning, Sleepyhead” Cain said using his favorite nickname for her in the morning. He had started calling her that ever since she had come to live with him when she was small, so the name kind of stuck. “I thought the sound of the words “Gypsy Caravan” might get you up” he laughed.
Myka smiled “Morning” she said in between bites of scrambled eggs and bacon. Cain smiled at her
“Slow down, your food won’t run away from you” he laughed, then pushed his chair back and stood up “I am going to saddle Terk and Shadow, meet me in the barn when you’re done.” And with that he took his heavy faded gray cloak off the peg at the doorway and grabbed his longbow and arrows, before heading for the barn. Despite her uncle’s protests she gobbled up her food, gulped down her coffee, and then threw on her heavy somewhat faded but not so much as her uncle’s, brown cloak and headed to the barn after her uncle.
[M1]coaxed
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Canary word: Present
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Hi, steampowered here for a review!
First of all can I say how much I am enjoying reading your work. You’re an amazing writer, and this world you have created is really interesting. I really want to read more…
As with before, I have a couple of criticisms and questions about the story (hopefully nothing too destructive though!) I don’t know if I’ve picked up on everything, but these are the things that I noticed:
There’s a tense change here from the past tense to the present tense, which you might want to look at. Also, they have coffee in this world? From the sounds of things they are hunting to survive; wouldn’t coffee be a luxury?
So Myka’s been out in the cold for days, and she arrives home as casually as though she’s been out to the shops? Also, I’m not quite sure what a “review report” is. Maybe some more explanation is required?
I’m not going to quote the whole thing, but this paragraph is long. REALLY long. I could barely keep focused on the text, my eyes were skipping all over the place. I’d really suggest splitting this paragraph up; you’ve got plenty of interesting information about the world here, but the way it’s presented is off-putting and makes it very difficult to take in. Maybe you could start a new paragraph after “how could she have forgotten about the gypsies?” as you are changing the subject. This definitely needs to be in at least two (probably more) paragraphs.
Erm… so what was the point of Myka going hunting, if she’s got bacon at home? I thought they were going to go hungry if she couldn’t catch anything?
I think I’ve picked up on the main points; as with the previous chapters, this was really interesting, and I’m looking forward to reading more. Feel free to let me know when you upload the next chapter, and I will definitely review it!
THANK YOU SO MUCH @steampowered !!!! I really got a lot from your review and it encouraged me to keep writing, even though my brain doesn't want too :/ !!
Hi, there! Lefty here to review chapter 2!
Yay! We got to see Cain in this chapter. I was looking forward to reading about how they interact with each other. I like their relationship. I liked this chapter and I got an even better feel for the characters and the world they live in. Now, onto the nitpicks:
I think you just meant "consciously". Self-conscious is like, being aware of yourself and/or not feeling good about yourself.
I thought she hadn't caught anything that morning and that's why she had to hunt on her way back?
This paragraph was a bit of a mouthful. It's too wordy and could be broken up into a couple sentences, rather than one long one.
Your grammar is decent but your punctuation is sometimes off a bit. For instance:
Glancing at the sky that was hiding behind the thick layer of snow clouds, she sighed(should be a period here) If she didn’t move(should be a comma here) the snow would start falling before she made it to the cabin.
I didn't find as much punctuation stuff in this chapter but I found quite a few places in the last chapter where there should be commas or where commas should be periods. Also, when it comes to dialog:
“I…I can’t(should be a comma here)” she cried out(should be a period here), “Help me!”
Whenever someone is talking, if it's a "she said" or "she cried out" or anything that is verbal, the sentence they speak should end with a comma. If it's an action like "she sat down" or "Myka had a feeling", the sentence she speaks should end with a period. And when there is a "she said" or an "action" between sentences like above, the "she said" or "action" always ends with a period. Hopefully that made sense. I'm not sure how to explain the commas and periods outside of dialog so if you were interested in learning more about it, this link might help you out. If not, no worries.
Alright, so that was it for the nitpicks. I really like how you described the gypsies event. It sounds really cool and I got a clear picture in my head of what goes on at it. I found Myka's dream to be interesting and intriguing. I'm really curious now as to who the voice belonged to and what the dream is about. It makes me wonder if she's a shapeshifter too.
I thought this line was really nicely and beautifully written. Nice job!
Anyway, awesome start to a cool story. It's an enjoyable read and I really want to know where it goes from here. Keep up the good work and keep writing!
-Lefty
Thank you so much @LeftWriter !! I am so sorry it took me so long to reply to this
I got a lot from this review THANK YOU!!