Hello parents of children who differ from you.
Allow me to explain what your words do.
You learned your daughter had a heart for girls
And in that moment your eyes filled with tears
You tried to explain that she must be confused
Seemingly unaware that it’s not her ego you’ve bruised
You learned your son has his eyes set on boys
At first you think it one of his ploys
He goes to his room with your words in his ears
“It’s just a phase” will ring there for years
We spend our lives with cracks in our hearts
You hold the hammers that ripped us apart
“You’re just confused” and “It’s just a phase”
May seem to you the truest of phrases
But a knife’s only metal
When it lies on a table
And words are just sounds
When there’s no one around
But both can end lives
And bring forth tears
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,732 Reviews
I love this poem! Words flow together, and you had great word choice, and the message is great, I have only two complaints.
First of all, the ending was kind of erupt. It came from no where, and it didn't really come full circle. That could be worked on a bit.
Second, the title fits, its just a bit of a mouth full, maybe something a little shorter might be better? If you don't think so, that's fine.
Those are the only things that I think could be worked on, this poem is great otherwise. I hope to see more poems from you.
As always, keep writing!
Does anyone actually say these things anymore?
I mean, everyone thought I was gay, because I queen out at every opportunity and my body language is as far from straight as Austria is from Australia (what a weird comparison), and I have as many girl-friends as there are hairs on my head. It wasn't until later that I found out that they all silently thought I wasn't straight.
When I told them I'm not actually gay, none of them seemed to care that much. Then again, I'm from a Slavic country.
Just curious, do they react like this in the West?
Things like %u201Cit%u2019s just a phrase%u201D are mainly said by religious families, so i guess it%u2019s mainly just in that situation that you%u2019d experience being told that. But yes, people definitely still say this. My parents said it to me.
Huh.. How odd. We're a Christian family, protestant, and people always told me, "It wouldn't matter to us if you were gay, so if you are, just say it."
I guess I just got lucky, eh?
Exactly what they said to me when I told them I was bi.
Hey TheMulticoloredCyr! (Love the username)
Let me start off by saying that the message in this poem is absolutely incredible. I think there are a lot of people who would benefit from reading this. It was so interesting to read, especially with the bonus of the rhyme scheme you chose. I would suggest maybe ending with a rhyme, something like "but both create pain that's all to real and lead to scars that never heal."
I could tell that you had a personal connection to this piece and your voice came through loud and clear; many writers, especially young ones struggle to find a voice and end up copying that of others, so the fact that you've already found yours is incredible. I got chills at the end, and though I've never experienced this personally, I was still able to connect, which made this poem that much better.
This work is inspiring, and I look forward to reading more of your writing in the future. Have an amazing day!
-1nspire
Hey, thanks for the review! I'm glad to hear that you were able to connect with this anxiety-fueled-meltdown that somehow became a poem, despite its message not applying to you personally. I do agree with you on that last bit about ending the poem with a rhyme. I actually think I was going for a near-rhyme or something, idk. I don't actually remember writing this, really. There's just a hazy memory of overwhelming anxiety and the inexcapable need to WRITE, and then this happened. (That was not a good day).
Anyway, how was your x-mas? (if you celebrate it, if not, then how was your holiday-celebrated-sometime-in-December?) (If you don't have one of THOSE, how was your year, just in general) (I'm procrastinating because I can't sleep) (but I don't have internet at my house anyway so you won't see this until tomorrow anyway) (when I get to a place that is not here) (because this house is supremely boring)
x-mas was great thanks for asking! How was yours?
let's not talk about mine, you get anything cool?
I got a stand for my guitar, a lot of journals and a violin. You?
I'm gonna move this to a private message, m'kay