Chapter 1: Gaia Village (all parts)

Hello there, human! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!

Shalt we commence with the mutated S’more?

Top Graham Cracker - Athena visits Jack to make a sword. They are friends, but it’s been a while since they have seen each other, time has passed since then. Jack has married since that time. No matter the years, he decides to accompany Athena on her adventure.

Slightly Burnt Marshmallow- I like this so far. I would like to see more of Athena’s family, but I’m sure that stuff is in the other chapters.

Chocolate Bar - I love how the pictures are drawn! They’re very fun, like watching a cartoon! I also like how Jack and Athena seem to be very close friends after being apart. The pacing is good too. It’s not too fast, not too slow. It feels natural for the progress of the story.

Closing Graham Cracker - Athena and Jack venture far off, Athena with her new sword. There is magic and mayhem awaiting, and much more unwinding of the tale, but that is to be determined later on…

I wish you a fantastic day/night! ^v^

Hi Taithoes! I’m toast, and I’m here to dissect this amazing piece of art: Skin Deep!.

Before I say anything tho, oh wow, I’ve rarely seen this much pictures on this site so far, let alone a full on webtoon! So, I might be a bit excited right now. Also, side tangent but I read like the first 10 panels from right to left bc I was too used to japanese Manga format lol… (no im not a weeb wdym, i barely know what BMHA is)

For the art,
I really liked the idea and execution of it all: The way you drew every single one of those houses, The coloring, they were all very nice and you have a nice grasp on panelling! (smt I struggle with tbh). Although, there are two(? non of them are that big of a deal tho) things that’d I’d like to critique.
First, although I really enjoyed reading the story as well as the art, I feel that drawing your characters more consistently is really important. For example, Athena’s arm length changes quite alot depending on the scenes especially when Athena and Jack and Jack gets down on his knees to greet her, the length of Athena’s arms get shortened quite a bit.
The other thing is, onomatopoeias. Although the overdoing of them can cause chaos and frankly annoying storytelling, underdoing them can cause misconceptions and miscommunications. For example, I didn’t realize Athena was knocking on the door when Jack got surprised and touched the scolding hot iron on his body accidentally. A simple *knock* *knock* would have made the scen a whole lot more clearer without obstructing the story too much. However, this second point is more of a stylistic recommendation than an actual critique, so don’t take it too seriously.

For the story,
I feel that there’s something bigger brewing behind the scenes. I really loved the forshadowing of a mysterious assassin(?)-type girl overhearing the two’s conversation. I’m also curious as to who Athena is, as she seems to be some sort of noble. I will definitely check out your webtoons to see if more of your art tho! (and maybe story if you uploaded any more of skin deep ahead)

All in All,
Although I haven’t been on this site for so long I’ve seen so many passion and creative people here, experimenting on all kinds of writing styles! This’s definitely unique to the YWS format, but it’s a welcome one (for me atleast) and hope to see more really soon! (though burnout is important so remember to take breaks!)

Have a nice day! (or night..)

(Also, this must’ve taken so long to make! I personally tried drawing comics/manga as well but i give up after like the fourth panel lol)

Castles, swords and a mission! You've got quite an intriguing beginning to a novel here :] As Avian said, I haven't really seen this form of noveling around here, but it's pretty awesome ^^

And the graphics are just neat! I love how they portray the character's their expressions so well, the dialogues also add their magic touch Jack is such an awesome character, though XD But. i saw a person lurking around... Excited to see what comes next Good luck with this project :]

Woah! I don't think I've seen a graphic novel posted on here before, so this was really cool to see!

Your art is amazing! I can't imagine how long this would take. I hope you keep posting here!