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Prologue: A done deal

by Sunflowerdemon3712

I was told dying was peaceful, that it was a sweet release. But there was nothing sweet about

this. I can’t see my sister through the dark murky water and I don’t think I would want to. My skin burns and the bone throb as water fills my lungs. At first I thought I would hold myself up bt the waves were too much and before I knew it my head was underwater and I was sinking. I wasn’t sad I was angry. I was angry at the girls who pushed us I was angry at my mother who sent us off to get rid of us.

Before I knew it I stood in a hallway it was dark and bright all at the same time. A figure

emerged from the shadows causing me to panic and immediately my fist connected with skin. I look over to see none other than Death standing and holding their nose.

“My apologies, you gave me a fright!” I yelp as Death adjusts their white hood, not allowing

their face to be seen.

“It’s quite alright, your sister did the same thing,” they chuckle as if they had seen this many

times, which I guessed they could have.

“I’m…I’m really dead?” I ask clenching my fists, anger burning through my veins.

“Yes, so is your sister,” they explain softly, putting a warm hand on my shoulder.

“That’s not fair!” I snap glaring at Death who recoils ever so slightly.

“I know,” they whisper, just making me even angrier, how could they be so calm.

“I…I-I want to talk to Life! I want to change my fate!” Death is quite obviously taken aback by

this despite not being able to see their face. “Please take me to see Life, I’ll even make a deal with you or…something!” I insist, trying not to let the tears spill for my eyes.

“A deal hmm….alright fine I’ll take you to Life, and let me guess you want me to bring your

sister?” I wasn’t sure how they guessed but I nodded and they shrug.

We begin to walk down the hallway and I realise my legs don’t hurt as they usually do. I also

realise I can breathe normally and my skin is clear and smooth. I didn’t make comment but I was sure Death knew somehow. We walk down hallways that are the same dark brightness as the first one only coming across one singular person who they tell me not to interact with. It was the same hallway until we arrived at a door where I see my sister and another Death who quickly disappeared.

I quickly run over and wrap her in a tight embrace, her skin was clear and I assume she was

just as pain free as I was. She asked me what was going on and I explained to her that I was changing are fates.

“Don’t do anything crazy,” she insisted, putting a firm hand on my shoulder.

“Okay,” it was a promise I was most likely going to break.

“Come on girls, Life is ready for you two,” Death doesn’t turn to us they just keep walking

forward missing the door knob first try before grabbing it and yanking it open for us.

I don’t know what I was expecting for Life’s study to look like, I suppose something normal

like my fathers but it was nothing like fathers. It looked like we were outside but also not due to the beautiful carved pillars of marble, theres moss beneath my toes but around me was bookshelves built into giant trees the size of a castle and furniture bigger than are old house. I felt tiny like some kind of bug on a floor.

There was a large fountain that had water spewing out with a large bowl of white fire, and

sitting at the rim was a large figure dressed in stunning lilac toga, she turns to look at me and I’m taken aback. I had always heard gods were beautiful but I had never truly understood it until now, her face was the epitome of perfection so much so it almost hurt my eye to look at her, her skin was dark like ebony, her eyes were a vibrant colour of peony pink and her hair was so dark you might think it’s black at first but they you realise it’s green and vines a flora grow out of her hair. She looked like a queen even without a crown or jewels, she was just that gorgeous.

I bow down before her and my sister does the same. I don’t dare even lift my eyes until she

says I may. I hear as she walks closer and soon enough I can feel her standing in front of us.

“Rise,” her voice is like a flowing river and I stand to look back up at her.

“Lady Life I am here to ask something of you,” I say meeting her eyes as if trying to challenge

her with the action.

“Proceed,” She nods politely, not looking away either.

“I wish to change me and my sister's fate, I wish to go back to the mortal realm!” I put as

much confidence as I possibly can into my voice, and it seems to work because her face displays obvious shock and she shakes her head.

“You both would have to stand before the flame of judgement, and trust me it will not give

you what you wish. All it will do is give you false hope only to have to remain in the realm of the dead,” Life shakes her head causing fear and anger to shoot through me as I feel my sister's fearful eyes on me.

“I will do anything necessary to give me and my sister another life, I will do a favore for you if

that’s what I must do!” I insist taking a step forward watching as the fire turned bright orange.

Life turns around and stares at the flame, her eyes go wide. She murmurs something I can’t

hear and I watch as the glowing flowers around me dim and the noise of everything start to die down as she slowly turns to us with a small coal in her hand lit with bright white flame.

“Could both of you please step forward?” she kneels down and holds out the fire to them.

I take the first step and my sister quickly follows after, as we do the fire begins turning pink

before turning a deep dark purple. With the look that Life gave I thought she might start crying as she set the coal down in the fire, all she did was whisper, “I’m sorry.”

I watch as Death walks up next to me and I hear them sigh. They turn to me and put out

their hands putting them both on my neck. One hand is frigid, the other warm both of which glow one white the other black in the strange dark light from the hallways.

“My bit is done, I wish you girls the best of luck,” they said after doing the same to my sister.

“So girls the fire has decided your fate, you may go back to the mortal realm but things will

be far different and there will be…consequences. You’ll understand more later, but for now I bid you fair well,” Life tells them after to walk straight into the fire and that they’ll be fine in the long run, I wasn’t exactly sure what it meant but I did as she said.

We stepped into the fire and it didn’t hurt a bit but I watched as my skin bubbled and

burned, I could only hope we would be okay.


Life looks over at her twin, they are far smaller than her at the moment. She puts her hand

out and they sigh, taking a step forward growing larger as they do so until they are a mere foot shorter than her. She pulls them into an embrace with a smile.

“It’s been to long,” She sighs as her twin puts down their hood to reveal their smiling face,

bright eyes that refuse to stay the same colour and blonde curls falling into their face.

“I know, but if I stay to long death will stop and well…you know that not a good thing,” They

sigh, putting their head on her shoulder.

“Surely you can at least stay for a bit, maybe for tea?” she asks, before today it had been

years since she had gotten to see Death, she was almost a bit thankful that girl had demanded to see her despite the grim result.

“I…-,” they pause and sigh “-only for a bit,”

They sit at her table where she had summoned everything they used to eat at Emotions tea

parties when they were all kids. She watches them enjoying a plum as she sips her tea.

“So why did you bring her?” Lifes asks setting down her cup.

“We made a deal, no ones done that in a while,” they say, lifting their head to look at her.

“That’s not why you said yes,” She knows her sibling all to well and she knows that deals

isn’t something he usually does.

“She…she told me to, she wasn’t asking she was telling me,” they sigh rubbing their eyes.

“Why those girls though….why any one?” Life eyes drop and and she blinks trying to get the

tears to clear.

“We’ve been needing people to take the places and you know we can’t leave them vacant,

those two just fit the moulds needed,” they sigh pointing their head to the sky.

“They looked ever so frail the poor dears,” Life hated when she had to make the sick ones,

the ones who she had to send to terrible people sometimes it made her weep even but she knew she could do nothing to stop it. “At least they’re healthy now,”

“Are you going to be okay?” Death asks, facing her once again.

“Probably not, they always end up hating me,”

Life brushes a tear away as she gets the feeling they’ve made it to the mortal realm.


Sorry if any of this looks weird it's cause I copy pasted it from google docs, anyway hope y'all enjoyed I have so much more of this story to share....if I feel like posting haha anyway that's it from me bye!

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453 Reviews

Points: 7597
Reviews: 453

Thu Jun 02, 2022 10:55 pm
Horisun wrote a review...

Hello! I hope you are having a wonderful day or night!
First things first, that introduction was killer! (Pun absolutely intended) The line " I can’t see my sister through the dark murky water, and I don’t think I would want to." in particular was just a home run, basically guaranteeing I'd read through this whole thing.
The other moment that got me was when Death pulled down their hood. It drove home the idea to me that their sister was the only person they could be themselves around. I really liked how surreal this story felt; emotions and human concepts being personified have always been a favorite of mine.
I did feel that the main characters bargain with Death was a little too easy. Surely others have pleaded their case to death before, and as tragic as their end was, surely there have been many more deaths that were even more unfair and trying. Even life asks their sister why they chose them, and I feel like we got a pretty vague answer.
In the line, " “We’ve been needing people to take the places and you know we can’t leave them vacant, those two just fit the moulds needed,”" you seem to apply that Life and Death are grooming them for positions in the afterlife. (if I had to guess, probably for the very positions they currently hold) I do like the idea that the Gods are using them, but I think you could drive that point home a tad more.
Aside from that, I look forward to seeing what comes next! I really want to know the catch to the sisters second chance.
So, with that out of the way, keep on writing, and have a wonderful day! :D

Sunflowerdemon3712 says...

Thank you for your kind review, your actually pretty close with some of your theories but you'll have to wait and see ; )

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904 Reviews

Points: 98
Reviews: 904

Mon May 30, 2022 9:49 pm
vampricone6783 wrote a review...

Oh! I take it that the girls are going to be born into toxic families.How did they die? Someone must have pushed them in water.I’m guessing that they are high school girls who were being bullied by these other girls and pushed into the water.A pool perhaps.Will they even have the same lives together? Or meet by chance? I hope you have a nice day/night.

Sunflowerdemon3712 says...

You're right! more about what happened is revealed later in the story, but I haven't posted those yet btu it will be coming!

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60 Reviews

Points: 351
Reviews: 60

Fri May 27, 2022 10:31 pm
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Sunflowerdemon3712 says...

So this is actually a story I've been working on for a little while now. I'm sorry that this chapter was so short but unfortunetly it's because it's the prologue and they're just not as long as actual chapters. But soon I'll hopefully be posting actual parts of the story and I'll probably do some updates on my little comunity dash thing so if you want to stay updated with stuff I'm ding you could go there idk. Anyway I've also got a High Guardian Spice re-write in the making but that's gonna b on youtube/other websites and not here so I guess follow me there if you want I'm: Sunflower StrawberrySpice332. Sorry I didn't write this at the end of the story as a note but quite honestly I blanked when I was posting so now I'm just doing it here.
Honestly I think that's all I have to say thank you and have a great day bye!

I think that was when I began to realize that reputation isn't everything. I should focus less about how others perceive me and more about what makes me happy. Because, in the end, I have to live with myself.
— Seraphina