Hi there! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!
(GREETING & INTRODUCTION)
Hi friend! Ellie here for a review this fine morning! I was browsing through some old poetry and stumbled upon this gem! Lets jump right into it:
Top Graham Cracker - What I Know
(CONTENT - my impressions / interpretation)
This poem uses angels and gargoyles to depict beauty standards, on both sides of the spectrum. Angels represent beauty and purity, while the gargoyles represent ugliness. The gargoyles are seen as these grotesque creatures who are almost demonized. The angels are placed on high pedestals.
Your poem opens with an amazing line, "My mind is a prisoner behind these eyes,". To me, this suggests the feelings that the narrator has of feeling trapped, representing how they feel constrained by the judgements and beauty standards of society, because of their physical appearance they see.
This poem beautifully explains how the gargoyles, or narrator, were created with the purpose of protecting the divine. What's interesting to me is how traditionally, gargoyles were placed on churches to wade off evil spirits. This almost seems symbolic to me, as if the gargoyles are these people who exist only to elevate the angels. the angels being those loved and accepted as beautiful in society. It seems like these gargoyle actually play an instrumental role in protection. To me, this seems symbolic of their hidden nature that they have inside, their true divinity and purpose.
I connected to this poem a lot, because it seems to speak of the feeling of being destined to a fate that you feel like you do not want. because of your outward appearance, your gender, or social standing, you are constrained to a life that you dont deserve. or judgement, hatred, or contention.
your closing line struck me really hard, "if they could only see straight into my soul," wow, that is powerful! We really could see so much more if we could see how others truly felt.
Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - Room for Improvements
(CONTENT - include specific suggestions)
Your poetry is truly yours and you dont need to change anything about it. If i were to critique, I would reccommend more imagery and description of physical aspects. what do the angels look like? what about the gargoyles?
Chocolate Bar - Highlights of the Piece
(CONTENT - include specific praises)
I would have to say that the highlight of this piece was how it made me feel. I connected to it very deeply. I love poetry for this very reason. Though we may live in a world of gargoyles and angels, poetry can take us to a place where we can see the true divinity in our own souls, as well as the feelings of others. Thank you for writing this! Please dont stop <3
Closing Graham Cracker - Closing Thoughts
(CONTENT & SIGN-OFF)
This was beautiful! I cant wait to read more. Take care!
Sincerely,
Ellie Mae
Points: 64593
Reviews: 648
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