Let’s go for the party
Party party party ,
We have the chance
To get enhance,
Level of energy
Rule with our mercy;
All the girls and guys
Stay whole the night
Rock the stage,
On the sole of height
Come-on everyone
Dance together
Nothing is today
To get us bother.
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,775 Reviews
Hey, I'm here to leave a quick review.
I'm not sure about this poem... is it supposed to be lyrical? Because I find it better fit as a lyric rather than poem. The repetition 'party party party' is better sang than read aloud.
I also this can be made better with more punctuations and organized with stanzas. The first four lines can be grouped as a stanza. Here's a link to learn formatting in poetry.
These lines are vague. Enhanced by what? Saying 'get enhanced' is like 'is enhanced', which means you have to state what's enhanced them. In a party context, I assume it's something like the level of adrenaline, the surge of hedonism? Give us something concrete to make us understand better.
Awkward sentence structure aside, I'm quite confused with ruling level of energy with their mercy. I mean, what does that supposed to mean? Why energy needs to be ruled over? Perhaps it's better to say, 'waves of energy released from our free will' or something. That would make the meaning more comprehensible.
Clarify this. As far as I know, sole is the undersurface of a person's foot, so relating it to height seems like a fundamental error. I'm not even sure what you're trying to say here.
On another note, I would like to add the rhyme here is cluttered. Sometimes it's perfect rhyme, sometimes it's not. It would be nice if you go over it and stick with one type of rhyming. All in all, keep improving!
Hi Shubham, this is an interesting poem. It was very short but, it did give off a party vibe. There were a few grammatical errors. Such as " Let's go for the party," it would make more sense if it said "Let's go TO the party" or " Let's go to A party." Also, when you repeat party, there should be commas in between each word. In this section, " To get enhance, Level of energy Rule with our mercy;" I do not understand what you mean. Are you trying to to say that the reader should let loose, get drunk/high and enjoy? If so, maybe you should word it differently. In this part, " Stay whole the night'" you forgot to put "the". Also the lines
"On the sole of height" and " Nothing is today to get us bother" do not make sense. Overall, I was able to get the gist of the poem and the tone definitely gave off a party tone. If you fix those errors, the poem would be much more enjoyable.