this is my first thing that i've put on2 YWS. No mean comments please but constructive criticism is welcome 
Betrayal
She runs through the night, hooded, masked
A false impression of kindness and joy
She is a traitor, disguised as a friend
Gleeful that all have fallen for her ploy.
Her eyes gleam coldly in malice
uncaring, unfeeling for the pain she has caused
She laughs, a harsh sound that echoes throughout
Filling even the bravest hearts with doubt.
Suddenly no one is trusted, everyone is apart
Whispering in the shadows, cowering in the dark.
She is gone but she has left a trail of misery behind Scarred in their memories, burned in their minds.
She creeps silently through the dark -
then slips away before dawn.
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139,593 Literary Works • 672,612 Reviews
Pretty good! My favorite part of this poem was
This spoke to me as a sweet little girl on the face, but a traitor in the heart.Haha thanks thestorygirl
Im back. It actually was really good. no kidding
Hi and good bye. Antidisastablishmentarianism. goodbye.
I like the main idea of this poem, the personification of betrayal was a great idea. However some things didn't rest well with me...
That line is where the poem took a downward spiral for me. At first you had a great rhythm and rhyme, but here it just sort of went into free verse. Now I like free verse, and I like metered poetry, but I don't quite like them together.
My favorite line of all was:
I don't really know why that caught my attention like it did, but... it did.
Overall good job (: Maybe I'm just critical about the structure thing.
Haha thanx people, well yes i do have quite a dark twisted mind so u can see where this is coming from........
i quite liked this poem, and thought it was very well said, great description, how evil she is.
I like it. It's dark and evil, something we all have in us. I like how you make her sound like a creeper.
Hi ZLYF, thanks for your advice, i shall take that into consideration
A great piece of poetry, if i am to be a judge of poetry. Maybe for this line you can put "her dark eyes shone with her malice", (if her eyes were dark, i would not know if you would want light eyes)