An unnecessary
Brotherly bite
Isn’t finished without
An angry
sisterly might
Wings like flags raised in the air
And a sword shaped beak drags through
The planned attack is now set in motion
Alas, destroyed in one blow
The family’s squawk recognized
Above any other like it
Now she reigns supreme and wolfs down the feast
(cheese and onion flavoured)
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
Hahaha, I remember how vicious seagulls can be. Let’s see what this poem about them holds.
And I love how you portrayed them as these cheeky sandwich stealers bc that is what they are! I like how the poem looks too :3
Ah it should be “sword-shaped” with a dash.
I also am not really sure if “sisterly might” fits in the beginning. It rhymes, yes, but I’m not sure it makes sense?
Wow! this poem is really something I love how vivid it is you can almost hear the squawk and see the wings in the air it feels like this epic battle, I can picture everything, but then the cheese and onion twist at the end makes it funny and unexpected I didn’t see that coming! Good work!!
Thank you! I'm happy you liked it!
SAYA AKAN BERUSAHA MENGUBAH HIDUP SAYA DAN KEBIASAAN BURUK SAYA. SAYA PERCAYA SEGALA SESUATU YANG KITA ANGKAP AKAN TERJADI ASALKAN ADA TINDAKAN YANG BEGITU MEYAKINKAN SEKALIGUS KEDISIPLINAN YANG TINGGI.
ANDA MUNGKIN AKAN MENGATAKAN KEPADA SAYA ORANG YANG PUNYA IDEALISME TINGGI TETAPI TIDAK SESUAI DENGAN KENYATAAN. TETAPI SAYA BERITAHU KEPADA ANDA, BAHWA SAYA AKAN MELAKUKANNYA. SAYA PERCAYA BAHWA WAKTU ADALAH MENCATAT APA YANG KITA LAKUKAN.
same
Just like "The Cat Poem" this is soo adorable. The seagulls at my local beach are so wild, they swarm anyone and anything for food. I feel like in the second stanza, you described the seagulls almost like knights, going into war for the ultimate prize (a dropped french fry).
The rhyme in the first paragraph is also really cute, it kind of sounds like an old school Disney line in the best way.
You have a few animal poems, I wonder if you'll just keep writing more for different animals? If so, I'd like to suggest a bunny, their my favorite animals after cats lol. So cute!
Thank you! I'm glad the knight-like imagery got through. I have been wondering about trying some prose and writing a short story recently, but I'll never say no to a prompt! I'm glad you liked this one and the cats poem!