Young Writers Society

"I cannot become lost in a dream". Such a beautiful sentence.
I really really really felt that. You captured the 'writer's block' in the perfect light.
I relate to this so much. You are doing so great, I love this poem. Do not ever ever stop.
~Coraline

Oh Lord this was such a mood! I haven't been able to write over 209 words in a sitting for over a month now and it is super frustrating!

"The words are no longer flowing through my head,
no longer letting me set them to paper."

Really felt your frustration there.

"The words aren't letting me use my abilities
to write,
to love,
to imagine,
a better world,
a purer world
where darkness no longer exists,
and all is as it should be."

Really see your viewpoint here, your staring at the page trying to put something, anything, down but nothing comes out, your mind is just blank.

I loved this poem! Hope to see more from you in the future!

Heya, Rubes here with a review.
(I am a bit younger than you so some things I say may be a repeat of what others have told you however I will do my best to help with anything I can.)

First impressions: I really loved this, seriously. I haven't been able to write for a while due to mental health and troubles; nothing has really been coming to mind lately so I haven't posted. This is so real and imaginable, it's nice to think someone has been through the same thing and created a piece based on it. The vocabulary is decent with great fluidity: it was a very enjoyable read for me personally.

The words are no longer flowing through my head

to write,
to love,
to imagine,

...and my spark is gone...

Hey there! This is a lovely poem, and so relatable for passionate writers. I really like how you've depicted writing - through the phrase "the words" - as something alive and glorious. It's so true that words can take us to other worlds. Another thing I really like is how you mentioned "using my abilities." To me, it makes it sound like the talent for writing is a superpower, and I really love that idea.

It's cool how you've taken the concept of having no words and yet used words to construct a poem to convey the frustrated feeling. I really like how you've used the three phrases, "to write," "to love," and "to imagine," each on their own line with nothing else. I think this helps to emphasize the freedom and power that comes from wielding words.

Once again, you've done a great job. Keep writing!

Noice.

Hey, its Jolley10101 here with a review.

This poem was extremely awesome, as a writer I can totally relate to this!

Things I really loved about this poem:
I loved the diction you used and the way you formatted the lines and stanzas in the poem. It matched well with the narrator/ authors tone. As for the reader, I felt a sense of emptiness the narrator is feeling and at the end there is a shimmer of hope for the narrator to hopefully find another spark.

Things that could be changed, but are up to you:
The poem is very well written so it's going to be hard to find something to fix.
The first thing I would advise you to do is to have a rhythmic pattern, meaning the poem has a certain syllabic structure that makes it sound more flow-like. It sounds a little blocky right now, but it can sound blocky if you want it to sound that way.
You have two option:
1) Keep it the way it is, which is totally cool, because if you want to write it more clump up so sounds gives the reader of the writing block. This would be a pretty unique and fantastic way to show a spark lost through writers block or loss of imagination and more of a blocky, angry attitude.
2) The second option is to change it to flow in matching syllables ON SOME lines. So it gives more of a melancholy feeling.

What I recommend is to change the first stanza to a rhythm because to me it sounds like it is more of a flowy sad beginning of the poem. This is because it sounds like sad loss of creativity for the narrator. For the second stanza the narrator sounds more frustrated and upset:

"God, I just want to
write again--"

So I would recommend the second stanza to be more blocky to show the anger. Again its up to you how you want the reader to see the poem.

Overall, I really enjoyed this poem! This is such a relatable poem and is very well done. Good job and continue writing!

Hey-ho! It's Eilís here for a lil' review.

To start, I loved this piece. It flows really well (despite what the title says) and I'm sure many of the authors on this site can relate to the topic. I'll start with some constructive criticism and then finish with the things I liked (I like finishing these reviews on a positive note). Alrighty, let's get started!

to imagine, a better world, a purer world

seek the surreality that I wish to know again,

The words aren't letting me use my abilities

seek the surreality that I wish to know again

but my vision is clouded, and my spark is gone... I can only hope to find a new one.