Time Management is Extinct:
Viruses ravage the land, leaving
too few to take a serious issue
and rake it through the mud;
classes provide mountains of
odious work, destroying the
concept of "free time" evermore;
journalism has been corrupted,
left to the few that seek to clear
its most regal name;
churches require attention,
taking away what time there is
on Wednesdays for play;
repulsive men refuse to clean,
leaving their children and wives
to slave away with their needs.
Time Management is Dead,
and 'twas not I that killed him.
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Canary word: Present
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139,534 Literary Works • 672,600 Reviews
I like how the text is all in one big blurb because that visually drives the point of Time management being extinct. Almost like this was rushed itself.
But I will say that it comes off as a bit too preachy. Like it feels like the person complaining is also trying to segregate themself from the problem and personally I feel like that can make a message feel ingenuine.
Like maybe if you gave more examples of what people are missing then it would feel a tad less accusatory.
But at the end of the day who am I to put you down in any way.
This art is a reflection of how you feel about the world.
And I can definitely see that you very passionate about the world's problems.
I look foreword to see what else you do with this passion bye.
Hey, here for a quick review!!
This poem was really something alright, the detailed choice of words and imagery just bring out your main idea much better.
"classes provide mountains of
odious work, destroying the
concept of "free time" evermore"
I love this part here, really backs up the point of how time management is 'extinct' and that time itself as you mentioned is being destroyed with classes. Overall this poem is pretty amazing. Hope to see more!
ty for the review! ^^