There are two types of people. The ones easily manipulated and the ones who are not your type of person to mess with. I mean, have you met Cardi B?
Cardi B is someone who is not afraid about what comes out of her mouth. She’ll say what she want anytime she wants, and she doesn’t care if it hurts you or not. So yeah, if I were a bully at school, I would not recommend stealing her lunch money. Unless, you want to be the next Nicki Minaj and have a shoe thrown at you.
Wait, then what about the other people?
Oh, are you talking about the ones who can easily be pushed around? Everyone has a weakness and cares about something, but there are some people who just care to much about what the world thinks of them. Often, this can make them change who they really are, and that can open a portal for the opinions of others to slip in.
Being manipulated can mean when someone has attempted to influence your behavior or emotions of others for one’s purpose. Technically meaning, someone tries to MAKE you do things or feels things for that person’s wants or needs. This isn’t always the best situation to be in.
So why do they do that?
Let’s not say why do THEY do that, but why do you let THEM do it to you? One reason is that you might hunger for attention and being liked by other people. Maybe you didn’t receive much attention at home or from someone that you had hoped to get that positive attention from. Maybe your parents or from a current relationship. When you don’t receive the right kind of attention, this might lead you to a situation where you will actually search for it.
This is most common in teenagers, and it can be very dangerous. Sounds like you? Then read carefully.
When you get manipulated, you meet someone that adores you or admires you in some way. You won’t always see it, but you actually love it. So you gravitate to that person who gives you what you like, and it’s the attention from that person. This can lead you to feeling as if you owe that person something or guilty when you disappoint them.
Another HUGE and more DEEPER reason is that you don’t know what it’s like to be truly wanted or valued for who you are. Therefore, you try and find a way to get people to actually want you, and you think that in order to do that is by giving them what they want.
Why is this dangerous?
Simple, you might go looking for the wrong attention from the wrong person. That’s where you get these teenagers sneaking out late and getting themselves into huge trouble. For girls, it could even risk their lives. It’s not just about you, though. Think of the other people that will be affected as well. Your parents. Your friends. People who really care for you.
How do you put an end to it?
Teachers, parents, and adults would tell you to say “No.” Especially, if that person is asking you to do something. Then if they were to ask “Why not?” Then you say, “Because I don’t want to.” If the interrogation starts to escalate or (worse) they start to threaten you, then don’t be afraid to do whatever you can to stop it. Don’t do it if you don’t want to.
I totally agree with that, but sometimes it’s not always easey. That’s what adults always don’t get. Sometimes the obvious awnser isn’t always the easey one. As a teenager myself, I would trouble-shoot the problem before it becomes something bad. First, learn to know when someone is a manipulator, and stay far away from that person. Be careful and watch where the conversation is going. If you feel like it’s going to a point that could make you feel uncomfortable, then change the subject or find a good excuse to leave.
Secondly, and most importantly, don’t be paranoid. Have you ever heard when someone says to someone who has fallen in love, “Don’t be easily manipulated.” Well, it’s true, and this can be very hard. If you start to have feelings for someone, I would suggest not going all out when you first meet that person. Get a chance to know him/her.
For example, if you have ever watched the movie Frozen, Anna falls madly in love with Prince Hans, and we all know how that turned out. In the movie, Anna asks Elsa if she and Hans could get married, and Anna has only know the guy for ONE DAY. Turns out, Hans was just using Anna so he could be king of Arendelle. See? Anna had been manipulated.
Finally, the third way to avoid being manipulated, is to have confidence in yourself. Have positive feelings about who you are. Sometimes, teenagers don’t have high values about themselves, but that doesn’t mean you should allow yourself to be hurt and pushed around by someone because honestly, the person you’re trying to get attention from is not in charge of your own happiness. How do you know for sure that that person has everything you need?
So here are my questions.
Think of the hardest situation you would find yourself in when being manipulated. What would they ask of you? Would you have the strength to say “no”? What do you think is the hardest question someone might manipulate you to say or do?