Flower Crowns

Liam’s favorite place in the whole world was the park near his house, where he would spend hours sitting in the shade, working on homework or scrolling on his phone. Sometimes he would just lie on his stomach listening to music, absentmindedly ripping out chunks of grass from the ground. Liam had a very low tolerance for other people, so he found the park’s solitude comforting. When his earbuds were in he could shut out the world completely, and he looked unapproachable enough that even those who recognized him wouldn’t bother saying hello.

Liam would occasionally be joined by his friend Elliot, always unprompted and uninvited. ‘Friend’ was a strong word for the guy, at least in Liam’s opinion. They sat on the bus together and that was the extent of their relationship. Elliot would talk, Liam would half listen with his earbuds in, answering in a monotone with single syllable responses. Admittedly, Liam found his connection with Elliot to be slightly embarrassing, but he wasn’t sure how to get rid of him without hurting his feelings.

Elliot was short and round faced, with large brown eyes and an annoyingly cheerful smile. His most notable features were his bright orange hair and the fact that he was one of the only other trans guys at Liam’s school. For some reason, this increased Liam’s distaste for him, he felt like Elliot had some sort of responsibility as a trans person that he wasn’t taking seriously.

One of Liam’s many regrets was slipping up and telling Elliot about his visits to the park. It had been a very long day and he had fallen asleep on the bus, his head banging against the window as the bus jerked up and down. When Elliot woke him up he had a moment of panic, and asked him if he had missed his stop. Elliot laughed and said no, and Liam said that was a relief because he wanted time to go to the park that day. Elliot brightened and asked if he could join him sometime, and Liam said maybe, hoping his tone indicated an obvious no.

Liam knew he ought to tell the kid to leave him alone before it was too late, but right now Elliot was only joining him at the park once a week or so when he had time, and for the most part quietly did homework. A couple times a month, however, he would bring out flower tape and wire, and insist that he and Liam make flower crowns, an activity that made Liam sick. It disgusted him to view himself from the outside, frolicking in the fields collecting daisies and dandelions like a little girl.

By the time spring came around, Liam was very close to his breaking point. He never did get there, however, all because of one mild day in June that forever changed his view of Elliot.

They were sitting on the bus in pleasant silence, Liam playing show tunes through his earbuds, when Elliot decided to start a conversation.

“It’s pretty nice out today, huh?” Elliot looked past Liam out the window, outside the sky was a perfect blue and the leaves were regrowing on the trees.

“Yup,” Liam said in his most apathetic tone, knowing where the conversation was headed.

“Are you going to start going to the park again soon?” Elliot looked so excited Liam couldn’t bear to lie to him.

“I’m going today,” he admitted, “I guess you can come, if you want.”

It was one of those days where Elliot wanted to make flower crowns. Liam begrudgingly agreed. It was nice out, and he was in a reasonably good mood, so he didn’t see any reason to snap at Elliot today.

The two of them wandered through the park, gathering flowers in the ziploc bags Elliot had brought. After they had found a good variety- some admittedly plucked from peoples’ gardens- they sat down in their usual spot under a large cherry tree to make the crowns. Liam wasn’t very skilled at crafts, and always had trouble following the directions, and by the time he had finished one crown Elliot had already made four or five better ones.

After what seemed like a very long silence, Elliot spoke, “You pass very well, you know.”

“I guess.”

“Like, I’m not sure I would even know you were trans if, y’know, I met you now.”

“Thanks.”

Elliot noticed that Liam was struggling with his crown, and silently took it from him to finish himself. Liam didn’t protest.

Elliot sighed, “Hey Liam?”

“What?”

“You don’t like me, do you?”

Liam, taken aback, opened his mouth and closed it again, no words coming out.

“It’s fine,” Elliot said, “I appreciate your putting up with me. And, you know, inviting me here.” Liam had technically invited Elliot to the park, though Elliot had prompted it. He hadn’t realized that it had meant anything to him.

Suddenly, looking at the small redheaded boy, Liam had a strange realization- the reason he hadn’t told Elliot to piss off was because the boy reminded him so much of his younger self. The optimistic, friendless kid in flower print and black leggings was not too different from how he had been a few years prior, before he gained what he considered common sense.

Elliot finished the flower crown. It was constructed from a variety of flowers, but mostly bluebells- Liam’s favorite. He placed it on Liam’s head, “There you go.”

“Thanks,” Liam resisted the urge to take it off.

Elliot checked his watch, “Sorry,” he grimaced, “I gotta go.”

“Bye.”

“I’ll see you on the bus tomorrow!” Elliot ran towards the street, waving behind him. Liam got the feeling that this was the last time Elliot would join him in the park. Strangely this made him almost disappointed.

As soon as Elliot was out of sight, Liam took the flower crown off, threw it in a bush, put on his earbuds, and lay down in the grass to rest.