Mature Content

Possessed: Chapter Three

“Donna, now is not the time for tears. We still have much to discuss.” Artemis’s voice was gentle but firm.

“Shut. Up.” Donna muttered fiercely. She clamped her hands over her ears. Stalking towards her room, Donna released her tongue and cheek and let the tears flow. She reached her door and yanked it open.

The bright pink and lime green paint was the last thing Donna wanted to see. Something blue and black would have suited her mood much better. She began to make her way to her bed, where she intended to spend the rest of her day. She paused by her mirror, though, and glanced at her reflection. A tear dripped of her chin.

“I’m possessed.”

-----

Of course, that got the gods going.

Do you have any idea what an honor it is to be able to hear the gods!?!” Apollo yelped. He was obviously shocked at Donna’s arrogance.

I’ll say! Not just anybody gets to support Nut!” The gruff female, Nut, growled. What kind of godly parent named their child Nut?

Yes. The Nut doesn’t pick just anybody.” Apollo snickered.

Apollo!” Nut sounded annoyed, like she’d heard that time a time or twenty before.

Apollo, we don’t need to make enemies of our fellow gods.” Artemis’ reasoning tone began to speak. “I’m afraid that you don’t understand what a huge honor this is, Donna. The gods can only enter a certain person’s mind. They need to be… adaptable, submissive, at a turning point in their life; reaching their breaking point but yet strong enough to carry on.”

“In English, please?” Donna grumbled as she collapsed on to her bed. For her own sanity, she decided to think of herself as possessed. It was an easier thought to process than the alternative.

You need someone who is insecure and ready to give up hope!” Apollo spoke in a helpful tone that made Donna dive under the covers and scream.

Apollo. Shut. Up. Right. Now. Or I will tell Zeus that our mission failed, because of you!” Artemis’s tone was clipped, like she was trying very hard to control her tongue and volume. Donna could still feel her rage, though. “Donna, you’re special. That’s-”

“Yeah, I get it. Go away.” Donna mumbled into her pillow. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever felt as miserable as she did now.

Apollo, you ruin everything.” Artemis muttered. “Donna, you know the term ‘annoying brother?’ Sometimes I think they modeled that after my brother.”

Hey!” Apollo protested, but Artemis ignored him.

Donna, you were born with a gift. You would be going through the right situation at the moment when the gods need you most.”

“What do you mean; gods need humans?”

Well, the truth is, gods don’t need humans as, say, you need us. The gods don’t need humans to heat the planet, or to water the plants. The gods need humans to believe in us, though. If we don’t have humans who believe in us, we lose power. We’re immortal, so we won’t ever die. We can, however, weaken to a point of near nonexistence. Unfortunately, humans still believe in our enemy, so he grows stronger every minute.”

“Your enemy?” Donna was surprised. “All of the gods have one enemy?”

Yes. Our enemy is Evil.”

“And who is it?”

Evil.” Artemis was irritated that she had to repeat herself. “All things that are meant to pose a threat to nature are born from Evil. Evil is literally a thought, so if enough beings think of a monster, it is born.”

So that’s where my mother came from, Donna thought bitterly.

Don’t be so quick to judge your mother, Donna.” Reasoning was one of the last words Donna would think to use to describe Apollo, but that’s how his voice sounded.

For once my brother appears to have a brain.” Artemis sounded surprised. “Your mother was not born from Evil. Evil consumed her when your father died. Evil preys on the weak. When your father died, your mother turned to bad influences. They encouraged her to drink. When she was drunk, Evil invaded her mind. Evil eventually convinced her to turn to drugs, because It is stronger in a state of hallucination.”

“You mean, when she was using, Evil could control her?”

Exactly. Evil convinced her to do many of the things she did. She fought it, though. The first time she was drunk, Evil tried to convince her to turn to drugs. She resisted. A time came when she couldn’t resist any longer, but she quit as soon as she was strong enough to.”

Donna tried to process that ugly thought. “You said that humans still believe in Evil? How is that possible? I have yet to meet someone who believes in Greek mythology, or mythology of any kind. So how can they believe in something that is an enemy of mythology?”

Artemis exhaled. Can a goddess exhale when they’re in your mind? Donna didn’t really want to know.

Mortal enemies, such as murderers, are influenced by Evil. Mortals fear these people. Thus, they fear Evil. They don’t fear the gods. They don’t respect the gods. Actually, like you said, they don’t believe in us at all. Mortals don’t mean to, but with their fear of Evil, they strengthen It. With the belief and teaching that gods are simply stories that were once told to explain events, they weaken us.”

“So, you need humans to believe in the gods.”

Yes.”

“Okay. Um, I’m not sure if that’s quite possible. See, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but quite a few million people believe in a thing called religion. Buddhism, Hinduism, Jewish, Christianity, Muslim-”

Of course we’ve noticed!” Apollo had an indignant tone, like he couldn’t believe the stupidity of Donna. “We’ve been in your head for years. We’ve viewed the world as you see it, and we’ve seen it the way that we would, er, the way we do.”

Donna felt faint. “Did you say you have been in my head for years?”

Yes. We have been with you since birth.” Artemis was back, keeping her usual, serious voice.

“Why didn’t you appear earlier?” Donna’s voice was barely a whisper.

We had to wait for the right time. If we acted earlier, like before your dad died, two things would have been majorly wrong. First: you would have been too young.” Artemis seemed hesitant to finish the list of reasons.

“And?” Donna prodded.

It was Artemis’s turn to whisper. “You would have told your mother.”

“What would be wrong with telling my mother?” Donna murmured.

“I dunno. What would be wrong with telling your mother?” a voice growled.

Donna yanked the covers off of her head and jumped out of the bed, her jaw dropping. In the doorway stood Christina Marlie.

Comments & reviews · 4
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User avatar
GoldFlame
Review

Hey, Flame here! Sorry that I couldn't get around to reviewing your epic chapter earlier...

Greek gods! I love how you stressed sibling rivalry between Artemis and Apollo. The humor was refreshing and balanced out the serious parts.

And the beginning pulled me into your piece like a magnet! I love pieces that start with solid emotion, not just rambling details. Her reaction to being "possessed" was amazingly realistic. Just a few nitpicks...

Possessed isn't necessarily the correct term to describe her situation. Sure, she might be hallucinating, but some witch isn't actually controlling her physical movements. No Tom Riddle using her to suit his own purposes :P. I'd also have appreciated more drama there. You need to set the mood, match rhythm to scene. Sometimes poetry is similar to narrative writing...

For instance, you could isolate incomplete thoughts. Break up paragraphs. Elaborate on how the tears felt on her cheeks. Add more of what she's thinking. Maybe describe how her voice shook when she replied, "Shut. Up."

Overall, though, this was great! I've never stuck with a novel for so long; that makes your writing unique ;). Keep it up, Mary97!

~Flame

Thank you! I tend to be on the lower key side of the drama, but I definitely see what you mean. I'm still working on the whole "leave myself at the door" and just write what should be written, if that makes sense. Thanks again :)

User avatar
Cheetah
Review
Cheetah wrote a review · Tue Nov 19, 2013 1:05 am

Hello! Cheetah here to review your piece!

I really think this was a great chapter! As Frosting and Bubbles already said, your ending was excellent. You treated it in just the right way. Beautifully done.

Nit-picky mistakes:

“Apollo!” Nut sounded annoyed, like she’d heard that time a time or twenty before.

This sentence didn't really make sense. Perhaps you meant 'Nut sounded annoyed, like she'd heard that twenty times before.' Otherwise the whole 'time a time' idea isn't really clear.

They encouraged her to drink. When she was drunk, Evil invaded her mind. Evil eventually convinced her to turn to drugs, because It is stronger in a state of hallucination.”

This is really small, just a small capitalization of the word 'it'.

That's it! I really enjoyed reading this. Well done and keep writing! :D

Hey Cheetah! Thanks for the critiques :) the first one was a typo. It's supposed to read, "...like she'd heard that a time or twenty before." Thanks again :)

User avatar
Frosting
Review

Love, love, LOVE!
I am speechless. The ending was perfect. Donna truly connects with you, and I felt her absolute shock when Christina stood in the doorway.

When I read the ending, I was like: OH, YOU'RE SCREWED."

And then, I was like: "Best ending ever..."

And THEN, I was like: "Totally writing a review."

Hehe, but seriously, I uber enjoyed this story. Young lady, there better be a new chapter soon!

Haha thanks! I'll have one up tomorrow :)

Wow! I really enjoy reading this story. I love the fact that I feel like I am really, truly there!
I feel like I am truly Donna. So far, I am very impressed. I also enjoyed how you ended with:
It was Artemis’s turn to whisper. “You would have told your mother.”

“What would be wrong with telling my mother?” Donna murmured.

“I dunno. What would be wrong with telling your mother?” a voice growled.

Donna yanked the covers off of her head and jumped out of the bed, her jaw dropping. In the doorway stood Christina Marlie.
It was one of those Oh freaking snap moments I absolutley loved it. Can't wait for more!!!!!!!

Thanks! If I'm not too busy I should have Chapter 4 up by tomorrow. I'm working on it now :)



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