To my Dear Reviewers (feel free to to spoil the spoiler... actually, forget it):
*magically turns Colour tags into Spoiler tags*
This is the latest version of the earliest draft this novel had. It may seem like I pasted some bits here and there, that's because it's true. That's how I started writing it, so don't judge. On the other hand, I wish to improve, and that's why I need you yewis. So, my favourite review would be... favourite bits and things it made you think and text quotes and unicorns... and cookies (not sure about unicorns though) Finally, please, please don't change your style because of me. I want to learn from your thinking.
The ground is cold here, but there is nowhere to go. Most people walk through the rain covered by their nifty umbrellas… I wish I had brought one. I wish someone could help, but they are all too busy with their lives. Someone is coming. I will just pretend I am sleeping. The steps are coming closer, just a little more… It does not stop. I open my eyes, I look at him, then around. He’s coming, he’s coming for me. I try to run, but I slip and fall on the road. He’s calling for me. No, not now…
My alarm clock was two minutes fast — or was the alarm bell two minutes slow? This time lapse allowed me to be two minutes ahead of those who had set their clock by the bell. During that time, I was free to choose between a wide range of free time activities, but I would rather take a break — otherwise I would end up wasting it with trying to make up my mind.
Therefore, during this fluke-based time lapse, I used to pass the time looking into space. I abandoned myself to dreamlike thinking, dreams that set in the space surrounding me and whose main character was dressed just like me. I felt like letting go of my body and like I was watching myself unconscious from outside.
And then, released from the burden of my body and my mind, I dreamt I flew away from all me… I think I really do, I think I can even touch the sky! I think about it every night and day, that I spread my wings and take off into the skies.
Eh, what is this gibberish all about? Stories of time lapses and skyscraper flights? When did I eventually stop making sense?… Can we start the novel now? Yes? Let’s do it then!
My alarm clock was two minutes fast, so I went down — since I was at the room having these thoughts (also, I slept upstairs)… I went down to Edgar and raised the subject. He listened closely and waited up until I was done to calmly give his opinion.
“You need to stop worrying. Two minutes is just about half nothing.”
He shut me up even before I could say a thing. He was known for his wise views — I had no reason to fight back, no way to turn it into any fight.
“You see, time is something we humans made ours — but it was there all along! We cannot count minutes, days, seasons forever — we won’t live enough!”
I chuckled. Edgar was one of a kind when it came to embarrassing my cleverness stardom into a simple wordplay.
“Why don’t you put that mindless thinking off your head and go out for a walk with me?”
We were walking past the front . I particularly enjoyed that part of the village because the grass was sparkling green in spring. Here and there you would wind up facing an apple tree or a blackberry bush, attracted by their scent and equally-pleasant colours of their flowers — or just because it was so hard not to find them, as these held my favourite fruits later in the year.
He stopped right beside me, gazing at the mountains, and said, “Do you know how the world is across that mountain?”
“No, sir. Is it even brighter and shinier than here?”
“No! Why would you say?!”
“Sir, do you see how the sun sets every day over there? I wonder how it spends the night!”
“Well, it certainly doesn't spend it better than its day! Right here, we live joyfully, in harmony with nature, but across that mountain are humans that aren't like us.”
“How are they, then?” Intimidated, he looked in the big inquisitive eyes eagerly staring at him.
“Uh, do you remember what I told you earlier — how time is something we borrowed from nature?”
I nodded my head vigorously.
“That’s not the only thing humans control, sweetie. The humans living from across the mountain don’t respect nature. Instead they force it into their delusions.”
“Are they happy?”
“Happy? No, they think they do, but behind their fancy phones, their cosy homes, their dull friends… They’re a bunch of well-organised psychos!”
I dropped my eyes off him. The ground was sparkling with water droplets. I brought a hand to my chest, asking (more to myself than to him) what made them so different. He immediately grabbed it.
“They’re not different, we are! Can’t you see?!”
He got so angry I did not know what to do. I had never seen him like that. No sooner had he felt that than he caressed the hand he had grabbed. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled.
“It’s getting nippy. Let’s go home.”
"We were walking past the front 
Points: 546
Reviews: 110
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