Unliminality
Striding in the space of fantasies,
Listening to the years that pass
In our lively ears.
Breathing into an unlimited world,
I let my fingers touch the light air.
Serene and weightless, we fly,
Dancing to the beat of freedom.
Everyday the streaming wind glides,
And when it does,
It takes our souls to the skies.
Riding a mirage to the topmost wish,
Taking a glimpse of fate as we all smile.
If it's not today, it will be tomorrow,
So release your heart and let it sing.
Hear the wail of an innocent child,
Leaving the trail of homesickness.
Surely if the sun had risen,
Any cry shall be heard no more.
Let's all fling our hearts, let them ride,
Bring them to the core of the world.
From the corners of the morning to the twilight,
Soar beneath the sky.
Ride to the unlimited realm,
Swaying to the pulse of heaven,
Grasping their hands tightly,
As we ride a mirage to an impossible dream.
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Hm, I quite liked this actually; you used some powerful imagery.
Stanza five, line two; "Leaving the trail of homesickness". Hm, this caught me a little and made me read over the previous few lines. I don't think that it truly fits into the rhythm and timing of the poem; it seems, off? Y'know?
I like the ideas and feelings of a mirage and I think you used the right terms to make it seem like the author is truly hoping, truly hoping, for something of which they know they will never get. I think it was very powerfully done.
I hope this helped, although I do talk a load of rubbish sometimes,
GingerLove