Chaotically Saving

I loved this poem:), as a writer it really relates to me. There could have been times where the flow of the words could be better but overall it was really good. I hope to be able to readand review more from you soon.

Wow, I mean, I can relate. This is really awesome. I can't really say how much I can relate. Most of us poets turn to poetry because we just want to do something, we want to make a change, we can feel it running through our bodies but it just can't come out -- especially with the way the world is. Its hard, you know? You can't always get what you want. The only resolve, somehow, is to turn to writing it out.

I only pray that someday writing can really become a release for you. Even if I write about the same thing over and over, I feel that every time I do, it is indeed a tiny release.

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As for the format, I am a total grammar nerd and I love punctuation in poetry. With this poem having so much variation, I feel that it could benefit from punctuation.

All clauses end themselves before you start the next line, so I suppose punctuation isn't a necessity, but my brain kind of had trouble processing the whole thing. The concepts presented are vague, so punctuation could organize them a bit.

This is my idea on how that could work:

> The feeling of both hope, and hopelessness;
> Wanting to act, but being unable to;
> Rushing adrenaline, hate and freedom.
> Being trapped in the world.

In this stanza the first three clauses are kind of connected (in terms of sequence) and the fourth sentence follows all three of those concepts combined. So, using different punctuation for those seemed like a good idea to me. Commas would have been a good choice too but since you have commas within each sentence, I think semicolons set them off more.

I kept the comma in the first line, though most might say to delete it, because it keeps emphasis on hopelessness. It has the ere of "Not only do I write about hope, but also hopelessness," rather than "I write about hope and hopelessness."

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The next stanza has a perfectly cascading pattern where each sentence has the same structure, so commas throughout would suffice.

> I write the stories I despise,
> I write the courage I want,
> I write the truths I deny,
> I write the things I can't.

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The next stanza, again, has various connections. Sometimes I like to imagine my poem as one block of text instead of separated into stanzas. This helps me with my punctuation.

> My hands urge to act,
> My brain refuses to process.
> My talent is lacking.
> I can do nothing but feel it.
> Release is impossible,
> Release is the achievable.

For the first three lines, I chose commas because if you wrote it out in a block, it makes sense that way. My hands urge to act, my brain refuses to process. My talent is lacking.
^ This is a pattern of "a is happening, b is happening. So this is my conclusion."

In the next line I removed the comma, I just feel like it doesn't work there. Although in the first line, I wrote that I believe you should keep the comma between hope and hopelessness, that same concept doesn't apply to this line.

And lastly, the same pattern as the first two lines follows the last two in this stanza.

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> Words, nonsensical,
> Meaningful in a way I can’t portray.
> Rambling, each with something new.
> Another attempt to find my savior.

My explanation for the previous stanzas also follows here.

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Again, this is all my personal opinion on the matter. I am sure some would argue that no punctuation does work -- especially since each line is largely separate from the lines that follow. I tend to split my sentences between lines so I am extra picky with punctuation. However, if you want to take a page from my book, feel free! That is what writing and sharing is all about.

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I had read another comment on here that the poem is somewhat disorganized, and I can agree. But given that you wrote you had late night writers block, that idea gives the background that this is the mind of a disorganized poet -- one who wants to write, but cannot. And I like that about this poem. I feel that I understood the point you were trying to make, but maybe it was a happy accident.

In either case, perhaps that context would be better understood if the title somehow reflected the discord that the writer feels.

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Overall, I loved the poem and I very much can relate. It is almost inspiring to me, I want to write more! But I don't have time. Haha.

Hey hey, Vomit here to review!

At first glance, this is a wonderful poem! I relate a lot to the feeling it portrays - the contradictions of ourselves, and everything else. However, it does seem a bit all over the place. There seems to be no clear direction or theme of this poem. And a lot of times, if that's the intention, that can work really well in the speaker's favor! However, here it just adds confusion. There do seem to be connecting threads throughout - for instance, the pairs of contradictions - but overall it could use a little tightening.

The form stays consistent and uniform throughout the poem, which is nice

I like the ending, 'another attempt to find my savior', whereas that could be interpreted as the traditional Christian savior, or perhaps writing as a savior. It's open for interpretation, which I think is cool.

Overall, this poem is sweet and on the nose. It's relatable and easy to understand, and in general, nice to read. You did a good job!

Hope to read more soon, and keep writing,

- V

I'm so sleep deprived I somehow read the title as 'writing to steve' :/
Love the poem though.

I love this poem! I enjoy it because it let's me know that every writer can have problems. And being young I love to know that I am not alone. I love writing and I hope that more people make poems like this... Writing is my passion and I don't know how I would get through my life if it wasn't for writing.

I loved this poem a lot. I get writer's block often, and I enjoyed seeing my pain put into words. At least that's what I got out of this. You can write very well and the way you made it so simple to read was wonderful. The grammar, punctuation, and spelling, was great. You didn't change subjects or topics throughout the poem, which was great. Keep on writing. Merry (early) Christmas!

I loved this poem a lot. I get writer's block often, and I enjoyed seeing my pain put into words. At least that's what I got out of this. You can write very well and the way you made it so simple to read was wonderful. The grammar, punctuation, and spelling, was great. You didn't change subjects or topics throughout the poem, which was great. Keep on writing. Merry (early) Christmas!