A small bundle of sleeping white beauty, so soft and warm and lovely. A picture of innocence in a basket, in the laundry. I loved you instantly; the little sweating boy, face creased with a smile of wonder. How many days did we spend running around the house, giggling and barking and driving everyone mad? Not enough. How many days did we spend, over the years, walking to the park; around the block and to the shops, or just sitting in the yard with the heated caress of the red gold sun warming your fur as I trailed my fingers down your back? Not enough, by far.
A large bundle of rushing white eagerness, constantly running about, barking and turning and criss crossing paths in a mad eclectic dash of joy; I will never forget you. I will never forget laughing aloud at your antics or rushing and feinting one way, while you pretended to go the other, and back and forth, side to side before we both split in different directions to meet in a circle not too far away...
How many times did I say I love you? Not enough, by far. My pet, my companion, my dearest, longest friend you've always been there. For twelve years, through the madness and the chaotic swirl of life; through the fights with friends and family; through the different houses and awkward growth you grew with me; you were a constant, a rock in a ceaselessly hectic sea of emotion and happenstance.
I wish we had parted on better terms; I wish I had been there. I wish I wasn't haunted by the thought of your terrible end; I wish I had locked the door that day, had chained you up so you couldn't get away. I wish for so many things, but most of all, I wish for you. My Houdini, my Bindi, my Princess; I wish you were still here.
I'll always love and remember.
I'll never forget.
RIP. 
***
My dog of twelve years, Princess (nicknamed Houdini and Bindie alternatively) was run over yesterday. I shouldnt have the left the backyward gate open. I am so unbelievably shattered by this.
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