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Survival: The Escape, Chapter 5.3

by HarryHardy

As they walked, Harry let his mind wander about what state they'd find the wall in. The fact that they were being assigned to work there meant the wall definitely had been patched up and it they'd probably swept the wreckage inside before sealing it in. They might have simply forgone the door. That didn't seem like a piece of technology that could be replaced in a single day and night. 

Soon, they were facing the glass doors they'd dived through the day before. They were in surprisingly good shape for almost having a spaceship ram into them. There were multiple scrapes in the glass and the usually smooth motion was much less refined but for all intents and purposes they were in fact. The doors were certainly not maid of regular glass.The piece of lawn that they had been working on for the past two days was completely unrecognizable. A massive spaceship now blocked their view of everything besides the perimeter walls that appeared to have been repaired from the damage caused by the flying spaceship debris.

The fires that had ravaged the are earlier had left their mark on the lawn, blackened clumps of grass left it all looking very barren and dead. They'd clearly not bothered to do any cleanup whatsoever in that department.

"Okay that's not a good sign," began Aria the moment that she looked at the tools that they'd been given or rather the lack of tools that they had been given. There was only a small transport unit and a map with directions to an incinerator. There was no proper set of power tools or any kind of protective clothing whatsoever and they were expected to be stripping down and transporting an entire spacecraft.

"Well that doesn't look promising," agreed Daisy.

"Yeah, the two of you please be careful. You really don't want to be getting injured if you can help it," said Aria.

"Yes Mom," said Harry.

"This is serious," she said, crossing her arms.

"I know," he defended," just trying to make light of this somewhat okay. What else am I supposed to say?"

"Sorry," said Aria, letting out a sigh. "Its been tough lately."

"Let's just start," said Daisy, "come on."

"Where do we start from?" said Harry, sizing up the wreckage. The most prominent piece was the front and main body of the craft, a long tapered nose area leading into a sturdy and fairly wide fuselage. The wings of the craft hadn't been here yesterday but now they sat on either side of, probably put their by the aliens as they cleaned up debris from whatever fell down outside the wall. There were also hundreds of smaller odds and ends scattered about forming a generous pile of debris.

"Good question," said Aria," maybe pick up the smaller parts first then work our way to the big stuff."

"Sounds like a plan," said Harry.

"That's it. No discussion or anything?" asked Daisy.

"If we discuss it we're going to waste the entire morning just discussing," pointed out Harry.

"Right," said Daisy," I'm taking the right side." She walked off.

"Left!" called out Harry and stepped towards the left of the ship.

"And I get the center I guess," said Aria.

As Harry began his work, he tried to look for identifying marks on the ship but there appeared to be nothing that was legible. The flames had managed to do away with most of the paint leaving a blackened exterior coated in gunk. It looked to be the sort of residue left by flame resistant paint. The only conclusion Harry could make from that was that the ship had been shot down intentionally, this was no accident.

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Sat Sep 11, 2021 6:49 pm
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MailicedeNamedy wrote a review...

Hi HarryHardy,

Mailice here with a short review! :D

A usual chapter from you with some interesting descriptions and explanations. I'm still concerned about the mystery of the spaceship, as you put an unusual amount of focus on it and still haven't revealed anything. I like that because it makes me curious when exactly we will finally know the "truth" behind it.

I have to be honest, I couldn't find anything in this chapter that needed to be changed in any way or anything that particularly stood out to me in a way that could have disrupted the flow of the reading. Apart from a small spelling mistake, I found nothing. So let's move on to the positive! :D

I was very enthusiastic about your descriptions and explanations. It was an unusually long focus on this in the first half of the part, and I also noticed that you did a good job of raising the tension there. I think you did a good job of showing the level of destruction and possibly the threat, which I think is very good. Keep it up! :D

Another point was that you managed to keep the humour in (I was especially surprised that Aria tried to take the lead a bit) and how Harry changed it into a joke. I think that's what I like most about the group dynamic here. Harry always has something in the back of his mind that his sister or Daisy don't know, but enough to take a realistic look ahead without losing his humour and charm. Aria, on the other hand, sees everything more from the realistic, rather witless perspective. I think that's very good for the two siblings.

Finally, I would like to say that we have now reached a good pace. The first chapters are always a bit more exhausting in terms of information, I think, but I think we've now reached a comfortable point where we've become familiar enough with the lives that Harry and co. lead. I'm still curious about what's to come, but I'm also glad to have "a handhold".

Other points that caught my eye:

doors were certainly not maid of regular glass.

The Maid of regular glass sounds like the boss of some Indie game. But yeah, there is a little spelling mistake. :D

Have fun writing!


HarryHardy says...

Thank youu for the review!!

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Sat Sep 11, 2021 4:36 pm
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ForeverYoung299 wrote a review...

Heyy Harry!! Forever here with a short review!!

That was definitely not very polite of Harry to let Aria handle the middle as I guess that's the toughest part yet that was quite fun to read. I literally laughed out loud and I choked on food... That is why one shouldn't read funny stories while eating. Anyway, this was a good chapter and had a calming tone.

Something which I was wondering is their emotions. Just try and give a bit of their emotions. We actually saw only the dialogues in this part and it seems to me that the dialogues are not their actual reaction. They are trying to make each other happy hiding their actual emotions.

The Aliens appear to be a bit too lazy except when something possessed serious threat to them. I can't really find a reason except this one for which they can put the wings beside the craft. It was definitely easier to throw them or wait...Will the craft be reconstructed? That too can be a thing. I waa assuming that the craft had been destroyed and they were supposed to throw all the parts and all into the well... We don't know where the exact place is. But all these should go to that trash drive, right?

This part actually made me think a bit about Aria. She is actually trying to establish some authority over them. That can be due to the age. Her try to do that was quite fun.

Anddd the genius havw guessed it and I am even 'more genius' than him as I guessed it earlier :D That actually sounds interesting and I am quite eager to know why they shot down the shot intentionally. I gave a theory, I guess ;)

Keep Writing!!


HarryHardy says...

Thank youu for the review!!

Hmm...about the spaceship theory....hmm I can't reveal anything now, but I can say this...the full truth about its origins will only be revealed in book 3...;)

That is known as building suspense for the upcoming books from the very first book. Hm... Good thing

HarryHardy says...

Hehe :D

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Sat Sep 11, 2021 4:29 pm
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RandomTalks wrote a review...

Hey Harry!

RandomTalks here with a review!

This was a good continuation of the previous part. It is the middle of chapter 5, I assume, and I think the rest of this is mostly going to focus on what they discover while working on the ship. Because they have to discover something, or the entire crash would not really have that great of an impact. Already Harry has made a revelation that the ship was shot down intentionally. I just cannot understand why the aliens would crash land it? Unless of course they were pissed off at the humans and wanted to make them work for extra shifts. Or else, maybe someone else was behind it? Someone who is trying to help them maybe or sending some kind of sign through the ship? I don't know for sure. So many theories!

I liked the small descriptions in this part. We have not had them in a very long time, I guess, but the little you included here really helped us to visualize and understand what they are working with. I also liked the small dialogues that were so characteristic of the three of them. Always with Harry trying to make good of the situation, Aria snapping at him for being happy ad Daisy trying to dilute any argument that might come up. It is funny to see this cycle repeating sometimes.

A few nitpicks:

There were multiple scrapes in the glass and the usually smooth motion was much less refined but for all intents and purposes they were in fact.

Did you mean 'intact' here instead of 'in fact'? I am not sure, but the sentence does not sound complete with the way you have ended it.

The doors were certainly not maid of regular glass.

It will be 'made' not 'maid'. Also, a gap is missing between this sentence and the next.

The fires that had ravaged the are earlier had left their mark on the lawn,

I think you meant 'area' here instead of 'are'.

just trying to make light of this somewhat okay.

This sentence sounds a little awkward. Maybe rewrite it as : "just trying to make light of this situation somehow, okay!"

That's all for this one!

Keep writing and have a great day!

HarryHardy says...

Thank youu for the review!!

Hmm...ohh the crash certainly has an impact ;)

Nothing says criminal activity like strong bones. ;)
— Magebird