Okay this is kinda supposed to be country does it sound like it? I'm not quite sure! But the words just came to me so hopefully its good!
*a quiet acoustic guitar plays and the voice is quiet*
I know you think this won’t be the last time
I know you think you’re the only one for me
I know you think you got off easy
But what you don’t know is I don’t care for you anymore----
*guitar grows louder and its electric*
But that was the last time with you----
You’re erased from my head----
Its never gonna happen again
*quiets down*
Because you’re wrong---
If you think tomorrow’s going to be alright
And I’m going to be in your arms
Well you’re wrong
Because I’m gone----
*guitar grows louder and its electric*
But that was the last time with you----
You’re erased from my head----
Its never gonna happen again
*the music continues being loud and the tune changes a little*
I can’t wait to see you alone---
I can’t wait till there’s no extra car in your driveway---
I can’t wait till your window is filled with cryin----
*quiets down*
I know this is harsh---
But think of me
When you’re all alone---
And I hope you hear this song---
And wish I was still there-----
*grows loud again*
But that was the last time with you----
You’re erased from my head----
Its never gonna happen again
No! Never gonna happen again
Never gonna happen
*quietly begins to fade*
Never gonna happen
Never gonna happen
Never gonna happen….
*pause*
Again
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To be honest I imagined it as metal. But it is beacuse the only thing I think about rock. The reason I felt that at some parts the vocalist screams is beacuse the lyric sounds like the victim is pissed of and he is not evan singing he is screaming.
I mean look...
I can’t wait to see you alone---
I can’t wait till there’s no extra car in your driveway---
I can’t wait till your window is filled with cryin----
It feels like you are justt rhyming beacuse to make it sound good, and there is no beat as well so it feels like somebody is talking, and.... it sounds like you are fething pissed off. So I though it more as hard music.
So work on ryhming and beat, or atleast a small rythem so when the person reads it he under stands how to read the lines. But I must say the lyric was good.
Nice lyrics! (shouldn't this be in the lyrics section though?) Definitely not very country-ish, but still good. To me it seems more like rock or maybe soft rock.
Hi FQ. As Adna mentioned this should be moved to the lyrics forum. If you want a review on it PM me when it has been moved.
I don't usually go for country songs, but this was... good. I say that grudgingly because I don't like country.
From a purely literary standpoint, I liked the end, with the pause. Silence can have as much meaning as words.
cool. it's very Linkin Parkish- sounds like something Chester Bennington would scream or sing about.It also looks like something Mike Shinoda would rap about. Very Hardcore!!!
Again this is really good. It dosn't seem like a country song though, a little more rock.probably because of the elecrtic quitar part. The lyrics are kind of country though. I don't know if you like her or not but this is not an insult, the lyrics are kind of Taylor Swift'ish.i really like the way the music is supposed to sound. The starting quiet and getting louder part.
"I know this is harsh---But think of me When you’re all alone---And I hope you hear this song---And wish I was still there" love that.
This is interesting, although it makes me wonder what the story is behind it, while reading i couldn't help but hear a slow moving piano, i believe that would cause a more epic effect.
I like it! Is there a story behind it? I wonder? Not all that much I would change, except that you might get better results in the Lyrics Forum. Other than that, its great!
luv/avie
Hey =) I think you were looking for a different spot actually. Here's the forum for actual lyrics. =) forum41.html