Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for mature content.
Klasina rubbed the sleep from her eyes as she felt the suns first rays hit her eyes. Looking about she saw the vast park sprawled out all around, dotted with trees, like the tree she lay under, tall and full with the first pale green leaves of the spring. Some had blossoms and the wonderful scent of them filled her nostrils and her soul with joy.
Just then she noticed again the boy beside her, her friend Daan. He was nearly undressed and laying beside her, one could almost notice a smile upon his lips as he slept. "Get up Daan. I know you're awake, no one sleeps with that look on their face." Klasina spoke softly but firmly. She was nearly naked as well, both in only their undergarments. Normally this would have terrified her, especially being at the park, but this was the morning of The Review and there was not a person to be seen in that usually busy park.
A Single songbird perched on the branch above her head and Klasina looked up at it as it sang its song of spring. "It must be nice to be you, so free, free to be yourself, free to show your true colors." She said as she admired its shiny black and brilliant yellow plumage.
Daan now sat up beside her and yawned and stretched, after looking around of course. Then he began dressing and so did Klasina. First the huge robe, all its buckles done up snugly. Daan's was earth brown with grey clasps all down the front and at the wrists, they matched his grey boots which went on after. Klasina were a purple robe with streaks of black and black clasps and purple boots with black laces.
And then those awful things they both hated. The each put on their masks and pulled their hoods on and cinched them in place and finally they put on their gloves. Daan wore a mostly gray mask with white eye covers and brown brows and tan lips. Klasina's mask was chrome, it was a special mask, with soft pink lips and big blushing cheeks of the same color, her brows were black and her eye lenses black.
You see in The Hague all must wear these masks, and robes and gloves and boots. It is the law and has been since anyone could remember. It was instituted for morality purposes or some mumbo jumbo. The intentions might have been pure at the start(might) but it had all spun out of control so very quickly. When the rest of the Netherlands condemned the decree of The Hague Royal Municipality the city had declared independence and sadly no one in the nation saw it worth a war.
In no time every citizen had to have every inch of skin covered at all times. The masks and the robes and whatnot. Of course the government was benevolent and allowed the people to customize and choose their look so that it might be a truer and more pure expression of their inner self. Never was one to let any other human being see their skin. It is said that even many married couples refrained from such obscene acts as having intimacy with skin showing.
One day a year all the good citizens of The Hague would put on their best robe and mask and gloves and line certain streets, one of them Duinweg, where they were to be reviewed by the Royal Municipal Guard and The Hague Peoples Enforcement Authority.
Of course this event was more a celebration and a show of authority and unity as anything. The military and law enforcement would arm to the teeth and make a grand show of power to the people to remind them just how blessed and safe they were.
"Do you still intend to do it?" Daan asked as he pulled the mask down snug over his face.
"Unmask?" Of course." Confirmed Klasina.
"You know, after this nothing will be the same." Her male friend Daan pointed out. He was seventeen, actually the same age as Klasina. Sometimes he seemed older, he had spent more time in the Society than her, but he was also playful and optimistic, something Klasina had never been, so sometimes he seemed younger.
"Nothing is the same." Klasina pointed out bitterly. The she stared into the distance where the road could be seen and all the people gathering like little flies lining up for their favorite spider. They sat in silence for a few moments. "You know Daan, last night was the first time I've ever seen the stars with my own eyes, not through lenses."
"Was it?" Asked Daan absentmindedly as he warily looked about.
"And this morning," Added Klasina her voice rising ever so slightly with thrill, "I've never woke up to the smell of flower blossoms before, at least not unfiltered."
"If you unmask you might never experience either again." Pointed out her friend as he checked the rounds in his magazine, making sure he was prepared in the case of trouble, and oh how there surely would be trouble.
"Another thing." Klasina started "I looked at myself in the mirror the other day. I blushed, me, looking at my own face in the mirror, like I was was staring at a naked stranger. It's not okay any of it." Another long silence followed.
"So does Kobus have anything to do with this?" Daan asked.
Klasina shot him a searing glare but of course through lensed eyes he had no idea. "Of course he does. He was my friend. A very close friend." Her voice trailed off in retrospection. "I never saw his face. Not even once. Ever." Daan did not need to see her face, her real face to know tears were welling up in her eyes. "You know Daan, when we watch videos or see pictures in history class of past wars or murders or whatever, they always put the dead bodies in body bags. Sometimes they just cover their heads, or close their eyes. They didnt do any of that for Kobus when they killed him."
"Well they didnt need to." Pointed out Daan, rather obviously he thought. "He was robed and masked."
"Thats the effing point!" Screamed Klasina through her mask. "Dont you see? They didn't need to put Kobus in a body bag when he died. The dont need to for anyone. Because they put us in our body bags the day we are born." Her voice softened to the point of being nearly inaudible as she finished. "No. I will unmask today. For the whole city. During the review. And disrobe too." She added, rather triumphantly.
"And disrobe?" Exclaimed Daan in great surprise. "Like how far?"
"Oh, don't worry, I'll keep my undergarments on." Klasina dismissed his outburst lightly.
"At this point I don't know what the difference is." Lamented the boy as the two began to walk towards Duinweg Street. The walk was some distance but easy walking and they held hands as they went and Klasina was very happy to have the boy she'd spent the night with by her side in this moment of moments. "You know I am with you know matter what?" He asked after a ways.
"I know Daan, and I like you very much for it." Klasina had never had a doubt about him.
"Will you never say you love me?" He asked, suddenly stopping and grasping her by both hands he pulled her close and tried his damndest to see through those lenses that covered those most wonderful pale blue eyes.
"Not today." Responded the girl. "We have work to do."
"Is it really necessary?" Questioned Daan not letting go of her hands.
"Yes it is dammit!" She burst forth. "I will not be shut up in this mobile cage that they call our patriotic uniform any longer." She caught the breath that had been stolen from her by the emotion of it all and continued. "The world will see me! Not my mask nor my robe. They will see my very own face. They will see that I smile, and that I cry, that I laugh and that a fear. The whole city will know exactly who and what I am before I am gone. I will not be another faceless mask for them to drag away!"
Daan agreed of course. They were both members of the Black Tulip Society. In short a bunch of teenagers who set out to disrupt the current government and society by whatever means necessary. Namely by crafting unapproved masks for citizens to buy on the black market. But now with the death of Kobus at the hand of The Guard things had taken a drastic turn. No one had unmasked, anywhere at any time in remembrance. Except on very rare occasion a legitimate psychopath had and been immediately put down, but that was one of those once or twice in a generation occurrences and of course all images and videos were promptly destroyed by the state.
So Daan and Klasina arrived at the road and found a nice open spot at the top of a slight rise in the road. Already one could here the drone of engines and the countless footsteps as the Guard and the Enforcement Authority convoy made its way ever so slowly down the road.
All the people lined up to be approved in their government regulated masks. It sickened Klasina deeply and more than ever she could not wait, could not wait for her grand moment of defiance. All would be settled that day.
So many masks and robes. Orange was a popular robe color, it always was. This year neon green and pastel yellow seemed to also be popular. The masks were each and every one unique. Some people designed and painted their own masks and owned them for years on end. Others more affluent paid for their masks to be customized and had more than they could count. Designer masks were quite the industry.
As the troop of menacing soldiers made their way up the road, all holding rifles and machine guns, escorted by tanks and assault vehicles and mobile rocket launchers Klasina could feel her own nervousness rise. As the first few rows of soldiers passed by Daan thought for maybe a moment that Klasina would retract her intentions, she would live to fight another day.
Of course despite whatever anxiety she suffered Klasina never wavered for a moment in her conviction and Daan looked over to notice her unclasping her robe. He looked up at all the faces of all the soldiers there for one purpose; to ensure everyone was dressed and fitted proper, and his heart sank. Nevertheless, allegiant to the end, he too began to unclasp his robe.
Once both their robes were unclasped down the front and around the wrists both Daan and Klasina began unbuckling their masks from their heads. It was an odd sensation always. Even for those members of the Black Tulip Society. The feel of the air, the look of everything through ones own eyes, it was all so very weird. Of course it shouldn't be and that was exactly the point. Daan just then noticed four soldiers stopped in the road and faced exactly at them. Not thirty feet away. He looked back at Klasina and she was looking right at him with a hand on each side of her mask. There was no doubt in either's mind now. This was happening and it was all very real.
With that thought ringing through both their minds they each grasped their masks firms and pulled them slowly out from their faces and then lowering them in something like wonder they let the masks drop lightly to the pavement. Truthfully Daan thought they would be dead that very moment but in fact the soldiers with raised guns merely stared(or so he imagined behind those masks) and their guns even drifted down slightly.
Klasina glanced over at Daan, as she had the night before, unmasked, but this time in the daylight. Nope, she had not been crazy. He was pretty much the hottest thing she'd ever laid her eyes on with his short curly hair and those dimpling cheeks and the darkest blue eyes you've ever seen, she could swim in those seas happily for an eternity she thought. If she were allowed of course.
Furiously she thrust down her robe. And there it was, there she stood, naked, except for her one peice undergarment. Daan followed her lead and there he stood in his skin tight underwear.
No masks. No robes. Klasina's face show like the brightest star one can imagine as the light of the sun glanced off it that day. Her lips turned up and wide and her teeth even began to show as she smiled. Her eyes flickered brilliantly reflecting the bright light of the sun and her hair even began to dance lightly in the breeze.
It was without a doubt the most wondrous moment of her life, and to share it with Daan made it only that much better. He stood, just as stark beside her, she liked him that way. His curly locks fluttered about and his pale blue eyes matched the sky, gleaming just over those high cheekbones.
It was then she noticed that little voice inside her. It was whispering, so faintly she could not quite make out what it was saying. That voice that always kept her company and never failed her. She could feel the pulse in her temples and the flush of her skin and knew quite well she was not currently breathing. Not from embarrassment or self-consciousness but from the thrill of finally making that stand before the world against her oppression.
But then again she noticed that little voice was not inside her at all but rather outside her and it sounded and awful lot like Daan's voice and it was saying "Run! Run! Dammit Run!"
And all at once her own pulse left her head and her skin cooled and her ears did not ring and she sucked a very deep breathe. "Run Klasina!" Daan bellowed and they both bolted simultaneously as shots began to ring out behind them. Flashes of blue erupted all around them as the military tried to use shock rounds to detain them. The two sprinted side by side across the grass of the park wearing little more than their birthday suits and smiling back and forth all the time.
Down one path and around a large tree and then across a faux bridge they sprinted. Soon the blue flashes of the stun rounds were replaced by the harsh bursts of the real rounds. The Guard was shooting the lethal rounds now. "Run! run! run!" Screamed Daan.
"I know idiot!" Klasina reminded him they were both in it together. Still she could not help but take a glance at those eyes looking back at her, a grin across both their faces, they were young and alive.
Despite every odd and most logic the sounds of people and then the sounds of guns and then the sounds of bullets began to fade as they loped their way across the large park.
Back down a narrow trail that sunk into the earth like a sort of canyon the couple emerged back on that hill under the tree that had woke up that morning. Daan ducked behind the tree and slumped against it to the ground, Klasina tried to run by but he reached out and grasped her firmly by the hip and pulled her in behind the tree and down onto his lap.
"Careful dear." He cooed into her ear as he hugged her close. "We have made a little room between us and them, if we are careful we can lose them." He spoke softly, his breath causing goosebumps as it spread across her neck.
"No I will not be careful!" She shrieked emotionally as she tore herself from his grasp and stood up before him.
"Please I am begging you Klasina!" Daan begged.
"I will wait here for them." She proclaimed defiantly.
Daan peered back around the tree and fondled his pistol He could see the tops of helmets moving here and there but nothing close. "You will not. You must survive!" He countered rising to his feet to meet her gaze. "I swore an oath! An oath to defend the Black Tulip as long as I had life in me and I will not let your petals fall to the earth here!" Daan was desperate but present and aware.
"I am not the Black Tulip, I never was." Said Klasina as she kissed his shoulder and peered out around him at the swarm of shining helmets growing ever closer.
Daan was truly confused and could do nothing but stutter "You, you aren't?"
"Eff no! I never was!" She shouted and then immediately relaxed. She took a deep breath and calmed herself and spoke much more softly. "The Black Tulip is Freedom, it is Liberty, freedom of expression and so much more."
"Wont you live yet more? And fight for that with me?" Daan pleaded.
"Daan please. I have seen the stars with my own eyes. I have fallen asleep with the breeze upon my very own real face curled up next to a person I am not even bound to for life. I woke up with the smell of blossoms filling my nostrils and I shared my smile with countless people I do not even know. This day has brought me more joy than I thought any day ever could hold."
"And wouldn't you like to experience more of that?" Daan asked as he hugged her close.
"If I run now I will never experience any of that again." She started as she pushed him away to an arms length. "I will either cover up and hide for my own survival or I will be captured and locked away and covered up forcibly. Either way I will never again live more than I did today."
"Please Klasina!" He begged further.
"Daan! Run! Look at me!" She pulled him close this time. "Don't let The Black Tulip Die!" She gave him a hard shove and he stumbled and fell to the ground. He spun around and looked up at her but she had already pulled her two double barreled derringers from her underwear and one was leveled at him, tears filled his eyes. He scrambled to his feet and stood looking at her from what seemed like a life away. Tears began to spill out of his own eyes but she cocked both her guns and he turned and scampered away.
Daan made it a short ways and from a hiding place behind a bush turned around to watch. There stood Klasina in nothing but her skin tight one piece underwear, a pistol in each hand, a hundred soldiers closing in around her from each direction. Oddly, a smile upon her beautiful lips.
She spun slowly, from behind the tree. Screams and shouts erupted from the soldiers, some of fear, others from ecstasy. She pulled hard and he watched bright bursts erupt from both her weapons, smoke wafted slowly around her head and then a hundred more eruptions from the soldiers guns. Daan watched as she fell limp in place, her white underwear now vibrant red, and moving, running, it was oddly beautiful at the same time disgusting.
Her life left her in a single moment, his heart wrenched and his stomach twisted, geysers erupted where his eyes should have been. He scrambled back to his feet and he ran. He ran from her and the soliders, he ran from fear, he ran from hope he ran from his greatest care and his greatest fear.
Yet even in that most desparing of moments he knew one thing and one thing beyond a doubt. The Black Tulip had neither faded nor withered.
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Those was a great story and I very much enjoyed reading it. I always have found dystopias interesting, and I particularly like those that play with ideas of individuality, such as The Giver. I love the idea of people buying different masks or making their own, as well as the idea of 'trending' robe colors. There are just a couple of things that I was a little confused about:
There are a couple of grammatical errors, but those are insignificant when put against content.
While I understand what its place is, I felt at some points that the idea of 'the black tulip society' didn't really fit into the story as smoothly as it could have, and I wish it could have been explained a little more- with a flashback or just more explanation. It seemed really interesting on first glance, I just wish there was more information than 'In short a bunch of teenagers who set out to disrupt the current government and society by whatever means necessary.'
also (and I make this mistake all the time), try not to get too caught up in describing things, particularly the appearances of your main characters. When that happens, it really diverts attention away from the story, and I felt at some parts a little distaracted by it, particularly in the part where Daan and Klasina get dressed. I would recommend spreading these things out throughout the story.
Besides these things, I really enjoyed your story. Thanks for putting it out out there.
Ashlingwolf
I understand I think what your saying about The Black Tulip Society. I apologize I couldnt get into it more, it is simply that I have a grand novel in my head but this is only a short story plucked out from that much larger saga... The Black Tulip Society is the all important linchpin of this tale.
As far as descriptions thanks for the suggestions.
I will keep all your comments and thoughts in mind going forward... Thanks!
Great work on the story, the premise is quite interesting and I would like to read more about this story/ universe. However, there are a few things I'd like to point out to help you in future stories:
The main issue in my opinion is that Klasina is, at times, far too dramatic for a normal person. As she's talking to her friend, she says things like "I will not be shut up in this mobile cage that they call our patriotic uniform any longer" sounds extremely pretentious and unrealistic. She could have said the same thing, but in a way that didn't sounds as though she was giving a public speech. This dramatic sort of writing can be used, but it's more fitting for a public declaration than a conversation with an old friend. This also ties in to her pointless last stand. Her refusal to run when they are a decent distance from their pursuers does not help her situation at all, especially considering her weapon choice. Derringers are easily concealable, but they have a small ammo capacity and aren't even semi-automatic, so going up against a large number of trained soldiers with only them is a terrible decision. We understand that she's sick of that society, but her sacrificing herself for nothing there would not have helped her cause at all.
Another thing I noticed is that some aspects of the story just aren't realistic, even for the setting. The soldiers wouldn't hesitate to either subdue or capture her, especially since there were a large number of them. That, combined with the fact that their skin tones would most likely stand out from the forest's colors and that their pursuers are trained soldiers, makes it improbable that they got so far into the forest without at least a flesh wound. Due to the country's current laws and culture, the soldiers should be used to targetting vital organs underneath robes, so it wouldn't pose much of a problem.
Aside from these points, the story was overall quite good except for a few grammatical errors. If you touch up the story a bit and keep these points in mind when writing in the future you should do amazingly. Keep up the good work!
-Haredrier
Thank you for the read and the review. I will keep in mind your thoughts.
This is really a sample piece of a much larger story. I have had this idea bouncing around in my head since I was probably a preteen. I've never written a single word down before of this idea. But I finally felt like it might be worth floating out there and seeing what the reaction is. Let me know what you think!