z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

The Passion Forest; Chapter 2 - Past the Waterfall

by CarrotWrites


“Photography,” Starla nodded, looking at her purple table. “That’s my passion.” Elora felt that Starla was glad, but for a second she seemed to hesitate.

“Mine is writing, I’m pretty sure.” Elora marveled, her arms crossing, though a glint of unsureness. But it’s normal, of course. Headmistress had said that we are lucky and special, I must be a great author… Right? Elora’s heartbeat fastened.

“And yours, Bumble?” Starla inquired. Bumble fell silent for a few seconds.

“I like to sew…” Bumble blurted, eyeing her collection of stuffed animals.

Changing the subject, Bumble suggested “D- do you guys want to go watch the sunrise or sleep?”

“Sure!” Elora smiled. “I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty tired, we should rest for tomorr-”

A knock interrupted the girls’ conversation. The girls hustled to the wooden door the color of Bumble’s hair, only to see Headmistress Margaery holding three books.

“I hope I didn’t interrupt anything,” the Headmistress smiled as the nightwind blew on their faces, Elora could hear crickets tweeting. “Here are your schedules, and guide books in case you need extra help.”

“Thank you!” Elora took the stack out of Headmistress Margaery’s outstretched hand and beamed with appreciation.

“Have a good night-” Starla added.

As the Headmistress left, she gave the girls an encouraging smile, as if they needed to be cheered up. After the girls neared their bed, their lights flew to the girls out of nowhere speedily. They wrapped around the girls and when they were released, the girls were changed into onesie pajamas of their favorite color and animal, their name on the back of their shirt.

While Elora placed the stack of books onto their glass table, Starla climbed to the upper bed. Elora settled in the middle, and Bumble took the lower bed. Each of the girls closed their eyes, but none could sleep. They were tired, sure, but they all had their doubts about tomorrow.

“I can’t really sleep,” Elora peeped, turning again for the twelfth time.

Starla sighed. “Yeah, me neither. To be honest, I’m a little excited and a little nervous.”

Elora mumbled. “Me too.”

“Me three… Just a bit,” Bumble agreed, but really, she was scared out of her wits. When Elora and Starla were finally asleep, Bumble quietly climbed out of bed, eyes adjusting as she looked for the schedule taped onto their guide book. Bumble took it in her hands and walked to the window to see under the moonlight, then studied it with heavy eyelids.





Bumble stopped breathing, glancing up at her two sleeping roommates. Finally, she made friends…and there was no way they were going to find out.

***

A minty breeze awakened the girls, followed by the sound of lovely birds chirping. Starla was the first to wake. Jumping out of bed, Starla woke Elora, who rubbed her eyes and Bumble, who’s eyes were bloodshot. Starla went straight to the bathroom to shower, while Bumble and Elora brushed their teeth as their own magic lights dressed the girls in outfits they wore yesterday, only it smells clean and earthy.

“Good morning, seedlings! Happy first day at the Passion Forest. I hope you all had a good rest. As for today, make sure to bring your passion item to breakfast, for you will be needing it for your Sorting and Passion Patch. I wish you all the best of luck!” Headmistress Margaery’s voice popped out of thin air.

Elora felt that she might burst out of her skin, her smile so wide it hurt. Then she sat down, and held her breath. She didn’t want to feel scared, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something’s going to be wrong because she’s not a good author. Will she be sent home? Not that it’s completely a bad thing; she can see her parents again. But she has a passion, it’s rare and she has to make value of it. She’d be selfish to leave. Elora shook her head, shaking away the train of thoughts and doubts. She has a whole day waiting for her, and for all she knows, it might be the best day of her life. She’s already made friends, already met Headmistress Margaery, but a lot more was waiting for her. If only she could talk to her parents about this; they’d surely be amazed as much as her.

“Let’s go, c’mon!” Starla beamed at Elora and Bumble, their swift of lights waiting for them at the door.

As the girls walked, Elora asked. “Is there a way we could talk to our parents? I’m worried my parents will send policies looking for me.”

“I rather not,” Starla groaned. “My parents would just blame me for not studying and being at a random forest when I should be at Harvard studying to be a lawyer.”

“Oh,” Bumble pursed her lips. “I overheard that the Headmistress will send letters to our parents, since someone had a cousin who went to this school.”

“But still, I want to update them about everything that’s happened,” Elora added. “And why isn’t the Passion Forest on the newspapers? I’ve never known it’s more than just a tale. Surely people would’ve reported it.”

“Don’t know, but this place is amazing.” Starla raised her eyebrows as she snapped a picture with her camera. In the picture, everything looked like an illustration. There were the greenest plants that ever existed, the sky blue as painted. The clouds shore, and the grass looked moisturized and tall. Nothing someone would believe is real. And Elora was going to spend four whole years here.

“Woah…” Bumble heckled Elora’s thoughts and gawked at the Flower Grove. All kinds of flowers were planted and blossomed. Each flower was as tall as a toddler, making good chairs for the fellow seedlings. The petals looked fragile yet precious, and the stem looked strong and fierce. There were hundreds of them, although seedlings had already started picking out flowers, colorful light floating back and forth, providing the seedlings with plates of egg, bacon, sandwich, passion fruit, and handmade orange juice.

“This place just gets better by the minute!” Elora licked her lips and pointed. “Come, there’s three flowers over there!” Starla first noticed the passion fruit, and chuckled at the wacky idea.

The girls followed Elora, and soon found themselves munching on food. Instead of chatting, the girls ate quietly, inspecting their surroundings, until a swarm of lights appeared before them, waiting for their plates. All at once, the flowers started shaking… All at once they pumped the seedlings into the air. Next thing they knew, they were in the heart of the forest with Headmistress Margaery again.

***

A waterfall stood in front of the students. The water was the color of emerald, plummeting down to a stream where fishes swam freely, its waters glimmering under the sun. Once again, Elora heard a click. She looked around, snapping out of a trance, aware of her surroundings.

Starla was beside her, camera flickering, as Bumble fed the sea of fishes leftover breadcrumbs from her hand. Elora tried to find the Headmistress, and waited for her to speak.

“Nice view, isn't it?” Margaery smiled, her eyes meeting Elora’s. “But your mission today; walk inside the waterfall, where you’ll be greeted by your Passion Patch teachers. And don’t worry, you won’t get wet, as long as you have a passion.”

This is the Sorting, Elora realized. Get through the waterfall? That sounds pretty easy. Elora walked to the line of seedlings, all eager to get past the waters… Mostly everyone. Trailing behind, Bumble could feel her head flooding with questions. Her heartbeat drummed, hands trembling. Then she’ll be sent home again, but what’s scaring her? Back at home, she has all her stuffed animals, perfectly normal. But here, at the Passion Forest, she feels special, like she has a Passion too. And for all she knows, she could find a passion, if only there’s a chance… But for now, she’d have to join the line, since she is the only one who didn’t. She pursed her lips, stepping into the back of the line.

Meanwhile, Starla’s getting more and more unsettled. What would her parents think, seeing her as a photographer? They enrolled her in an elite private school, forced her to learn violin and piano, master multiplication at six years old, and be the top of her class. It was only two years ago, on her tenth birthday when she received her camera as a gift from her aunt. It became her favorite thing to do, taking pictures of unique things and people, breathtaking landscape and nature. She could share these photos with the world, giving them entertainment, inspiration, and hope… But that’s not what her parents want her to be, expects her to be. She often feels trapped, but no doubt her prosperous parents won’t support her—which is why she kept her passion a secret. What would her parents think of her when they received the letter? Although her parents expect her to be a lawyer, they know deep in their heart that their daughter wants nothing to do with being a lawyer like them.

It was Elora’s turn. Starla and Bumble gaped as they watched their friend stand in front of the waterfall. This is it, Elora thought. The moment my dream comes true. The moment that proves my hard work is worth it. The start of my passion. Her heartbeat fastened, her body beating with her heart. Her breath slowed, nothing in the world except her and the waterfall. Slowly, Elora’s feet lifted. She took a step forward, instantly blinded by a dazzling glow.

She was not with her Passion Patch.

Instead, Elora finds herself in a room with nothing but white—white everywhere she looks. She started to run, but she doesn’t know whether she’s moving at all, or if she was just running in place.

Panic rising, Elora murmured. “Hullo?”

Thud.

Elora turned, squinting at the sudden light. A silhouette moves towards her, arms stretched out in front. For a moment, Elora thought it was a zombie.

“Starla!” Elora rushed to a tall girl, relieved that she wasn't alone. Starla blinked as her eyes adjusted.

“Elora? Where are we?” she questioned.

“I have no idea,” Elora shrugged, there was a moment of silence. After a few seconds, Elora jumped at the sudden sound.

“Bumble!” Both girls scampered to their friend.

Bumble looked around “Where are the others?” Her face turned pale as a ghost, all she managed was a “Oh no.”


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
229 Reviews


Points: 9163
Reviews: 229

Donate
Sun Aug 27, 2023 10:17 pm
View Likes
foxmaster wrote a review...



Hey, foxmaster here for a review!
WHAT'S GOING ON????? What's Bumble's passion?! Why doesn't she want then to know? Where are they? Does her secret passion have something to do with it????!!!
I apologize. That was just me yelling about the cliffhanger, lol. Now, the review:
First of all, I think you did a lot better job with the tenses, and the third-person, first-person thing, although I did notice some mistakes:

Bumble stopped breathing, glancing up at her two sleeping roommates. Finally, she made friends…and there was no way they were going to find out.

here, I think you should add, like, "There was no way they were going to find out her secret", or something like that, because it just kind of cuts off in a way.
Starla woke Elora, who rubbed her eyes and Bumble, who’s eyes were bloodshot. Starla went straight to the bathroom to shower, while Bumble and Elora brushed their teeth as their own magic lights dressed the girls in outfits they wore yesterday, only it smells clean and earthy.

here, I would replace smells with smelled, and also the first sentence doesn't really make that much sense.
I also found a mistake with the tenses here...
Then she sat down, and held her breath. She didn’t want to feel scared, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something’s going to be wrong because she’s not a good author. Will she be sent home? Not that it’s completely a bad thing; she can see her parents again. But she has a passion, it’s rare and she has to make value of it. She’d be selfish to leave. Elora shook her head, shaking away the train of thoughts and doubts. She has a whole day waiting for her, and for all she knows, it might be the best day of her life. She’s already made friends, already met Headmistress Margaery, but a lot more was waiting for her. If only she could talk to her parents about this; they’d surely be amazed as much as her.

Meanwhile, Starla’s getting more and more unsettled. What would her parents think, seeing her as a photographer?

but, other than that, it's all, and I loved this, is was so interesting!!! Can't wait for more!
-Foxmaster




CarrotWrites says...


Hey!! :D

Thank you so much for continuing on this journey! And yup, what's going on?! Haha, I'm very glad you have questions and is intrigued. Ahh, yes! Your feedback was very helpful the other times, and I really tried to fix the tenses. I got kind of confused, but I'm trying to work on that. Thanks so much for the careful reading! I also noticed that, and I'll really try to take your advice and work more on everything. Thanks so much again for your time and helpful feedback! :D



foxmaster says...


You're welcome! :)



CarrotWrites says...


:)



User avatar
211 Reviews


Points: 22958
Reviews: 211

Donate
Sat Aug 26, 2023 5:59 pm
View Likes
OrabellaAvenue wrote a review...



Hiya! This is Orabella, here with a review.

Ahhhhh! Where are they? What's happening? Is this normal? A completely white room... I wonder how big it is. Are they in danger? Why did Bumble say oh no? Is it only the three of them? If so, why? If not, who else is there? So many questions! (And if they're answered in the following chapter/s, then you obviously don't need to tell me. That goes for any question I ask, actually.)

What doesn't Bumble want the others to find out? Her passion? Maybe her lack of one? Or something else? Maybe it's more serious than that.

I like the backstory we get on Starla. She's worried her wants and dreams don't meet her parents expectations of her, and they definitely do have high ones. I honestly don't understand why people would want to be lawyers, and so I get where Starla is coming from. But that's just me.

My only suggestion is to take a look at your tenses (past tense, present tense). Sometimes you mix up the two, which, by the way, I do all the time and I seriously struggle with.

For example,

Instead, Elora finds herself in a room with nothing but white—white everywhere she looks. She started to run, but she doesn’t know whether she’s moving at all, or if she was[/u] just running in place.


Sometimes you use present tense, like "finds" or "she's" (as in she [i]is), and sometimes it's past, like "started" or "was". Many writers struggle with this, myself included.

Starla first noticed the passion fruit, and chuckled at the wacky idea.


Hmm... I'm glad I could help create a wacky idea! I'm seriously so glad you liked my silly idea enough to put it in your story. :D

I love that note. It looks so cool, and it's a nice addition. How did you make it?

Thank you so much for writing and sharing this! I love it so much, and this story has become one of my favorites. Please keep writing!




CarrotWrites says...


Hello hello!

Thank you so much for writing this review again, and once again, you have bought a gigantic smile to my face. First of all, I'm so glad you have questions on your mind! And, congratulations, because once again, you predicted it(not going to tell you which one for spoilers sake ;)). And yup, the questions will be in Chapter 3. I completely agree with you, I think lawyers are no fun as well. It's one of the reasons I chose that for Starla's expectations!
Wow, thank you so much for spotting this! I have been told definitely more than a few times about this, but this makes me think more. I will definitely try and fix those mistakes. Thanks for your understanding, and thank you so much for your careful reading and feedback!
Haha. Of course, thank you again for suggesting it, it's definitely a very helpful one. :D As for the note, I made it on a website called Canva, which I use for school. It might be a bit harder to use it for personal use, but it's still a very nice website!
I can't thank YOU enough for continuing on this journey with the main characters. I'm so so glad that you enjoy it, and has become your favorite (hey, are you a professional motivation-giver?). It really makes writing this so much ore enjoyable! I'll definitely do, don't worry!




Anne felt that life was really not worth living without puffed sleeves.
— L. M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables