E - Everyone

Prologue - The Passion Forest

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It was not an everyday thing where kids get snatched by white beams of light to a forest where they learn to pursue their passion. But it happened—and there is no going back now.

Gradually, the students woke, sitting up. Some looked flabbergasted, some petrified, and some thrilled. But to Elora, she was feeling it all. On one hand, she’s worried about her parents; Are they worried? When will I see them again?

But on the other hand… The Passion Forest. She could learn, she could learn it all. How to become the best-selling, Nobel-prize winning, and above all, admired and valued author of her dreams. She could make friends, even. And from what she could tell, it wasn’t just any normal school, but a school in the forest instead, a school where teachers are wise, a school for kids to do their favorite thing everyday, a school supported by, what Elora had seen, magic.

She looked around at the succulent and fragrant leaves hanging high on the trees' spindly yet lush branches. The baby blue sky swarmed with ashen clouds that Elora envisioned as dragons, the air was the smell of sunlight, redolence wind rustling the leaves. Magically, leaves from each tree fluttered off their boughs and billowed past the students, who all ogled in the direction the leaves were scurrying. The greenery gathered whilst students gasped and observed with open-mouth as it shaped a long oval, blowing away then forming a woman—her sparkling sapphire eyes opened, silver hair flowing over her shoulder, smiling so lively and coruscatingly, everyone encompassing felt appeased. Different colored lights united in from behind the scholars and danced in the air as they turned into the faculty, standing behind the smiling woman, each looking thrilled as they surveyed the myriads of students. For a moment, the forest was hushed.

“Welcome, seedlings, to the Passion Forest.” the woman at the front, most likely the legendary gardener, spoke. Her voice was calm and steady, yet so wise that Elora felt astonishingly familiar.

“I believe all, if not most of you have heard of the tale of the Passion Forest,” the gardener observed. “About a girl, who, like all of you, had a dream, a passion. And as many of you would have guessed, Margaery who pursued her dreams and followed her heart stands here before you.”

Margaery. That’s her name, Elora mused.

“For three decades, I’ve taught youngsters like you, whom I call seedlings. Every four years, unique students with a heart itching to bring value to our world gather in this very forest. In four years time, me and my crew will train you to the best of our abilities to make your dreams come true.”

“Through your journey at the Passion Forest, we will show you ways to focus on your passion, pursue your dreams, and after you graduate and leave for the outside world, we make sure you bring value to the world, to make a differences, to make people's lives easier, more enjoyable, and to make a better future, all through unique, but valuable lessons. But of course it’s not completely up to us—each of you needs to work hard for your passion, and to follow your heart, every one of you needs to focus on your passion, and take our advice to the real world, where we will not be able to guide you along.” Elora twined her toes in her baby pink sandals, what if she doesn’t learn it all? But what if she does, who will she become? What will she learn?

“It's never too late to follow your heart, for everyone just needs to discover where their enthusiasm and talent lies. Unfortunately, there are many who don’t, even to an old age. But all of you are here for a reason, a passion is a rare thing to find; and those who have passions are extremely lucky, especially at such a young age. And we, as your mentors will support you along the way, and make you the person you want to be. From a seedling, your passion will grow to a sapling, a young tree, and finally a grown tree, your passion is ready for the world.” Elora’s eyes widened, what if she could make a difference in the world? Then she would matter to the whole world! That’s something even she couldn’t quite imagine, but it’s her passion, a rare thing, a lucky thing to have. She won’t waste this opportunity she’s been given.

“Each of you will be sorted into your own passion group, which we call your Passion Patch, where one teacher will guide you and other seedlings along with your passion. Then, each of you will get your own leaf, acting as a keycard to your treehouses, where you will sleep with your two other roommates. Breakfast and special occasions will be served in the Flower Grove, lunch and dinner in Shrubshome.” Headmistress Margaery finished.

“Any questions?” Headmistress Margaery probed, as a boy with red-brown hair and big gray eyes raised his hands high.

“Why is my cooking stuff here?” he asked with a German accent, looking down at his feet.

“Oh! Great question; each of you is equipped with your own item, or items, that will support your passion, which will follow you to your rooms later when questions are answered.”

Everyone looked at their feet, mirroring the red-haired boy, bewildered.

A girl with round glasses asked. “I’m not good at English. Can you help?”

Headmistress nodded approvingly. “Another crucial question, it seems. To answer your questions, some seedlings find this less of a challenge, while others the opposite, depending on one's passion. There are lots of seedlings, and I’m sure at least one of them has a passion for translating, or knows your native language. We will learn how to work with others this year, and your goal can be to improve your English language skills, which will almost be guaranteed to serve you well after graduating. Any others?”

Without thinking, Elora’s hands shot up in the air, slightly trembling from all that's happened.

“Yes?” Headmistress Margaery smiled.

Elora took a deep breath and asked briskly. “Will we be able to visit our parents? Do our roommates have the same passion as we? When will the classes start?”

“Well, those are some excellent questions,” the Headmistress chuckled. “Yes, you will be able to visit your parents during vacation every summer for one week only. No, roommates are random, but I trust you will become good friends despite your differences. The classes start tomorrow, after you all have some rest.” Headmistress Margaery paused, waiting for questions. “Now, each of you will be given a leaf; be sure to be careful with it, and don’t lose it.”

Just as Headmistress closed her mouth, leaves fell from the sky at a swift pace, they froze in midair each in front of the seedlings face, and with that, the leaves started to guide the seedlings to their new treehouses.

Elora tried to focus on breathing even, rather than how, in the past hour, she was dragged out of her family tent to a magical forest with her pajamas. Following the leaf, with her baby-pink light following her, her face lit up with awe as she strolled through Passion Forest. There are trees, each a different size and shape, thriving with juicy fruits and blooming flowers. Elora studied the treehouses she passed; each was built on a large tree, maybe eight times Elora’s height. The windows were polished and crystalline, small block-shaped houses built on massive tree branches. Wooden staircase twisted the way up. Each treehouse has three rooms, meaning nine seedlings in each tree. Who’s going to be my roommate? Elora wondered. Are we going to be friends?Is there a way that I can talk to my parents from here?

Elora didn’t know when the leaf paused in front of a treehouse; just enough time for her to finally inspect it with vigilance. Now she had realized, each house was carved with a number and three names. Everything looks made out of wood; from the doors to the walls, and the treehouse looks like it fell straight out of a fairytale, looking entrancing and spellbinding. Just looking at it sends a wave of relief and excitement at once down Elora’s body. Elora carefully grabbed the leaf, clutching it in her warm palm and stepped on the spiral stairs, her light still following her. She walked to the top, and examined where three names were carved on the door.

Tree 15 - House 3

Elora Axa

Starla Kiera Loppie

Bumble Beam

Elora took a deep breath, and plugged the leaf into the thin rectangular hole beside her and her roommate’s names. As the light caressed her face, Elora’s eyes went from large to larger as she entered her room. Light flooded every corner of the room, gleaming with radiance, casting a glow on a bunk bed for three. Three bean bags sat next to the bed with a small table. There were two doors, Elora opened the first one to see a bathroom decorated with yellow and blue, a toilet, shower, and bathtub, pink, purple, and yellow towels hung on three glass towel-ramps. Elora noticed the three colors filled the room; shelves, toothbrushes, and bean bags. Elora opened the other door, only to find pink, purple, and yellow desks. Suddenly, the light behind Elora, one she forgot about, flew onto the pink table; the computer perched opened. Only then did Elora understand. The colors represents the different people in the room, and the room she’s in is for storing she and her roommate’s objects to support, and maybe even work on their passi—

Elora heard the door open. Belatedly Elora pushed the half closed door before her and peered into the room. As the room came into view, her eyes found a girl with long brown hair entering. Her wavy hair was tied in a ponytail, her blue eyes looked kind and inviting, darting around to inspect the room, stopped when she noticed Elora, her body hidden by the door, her head sticking out. Other than Elora’s one awkward blink, nothing happened for a second.

“Hi!” she waved warmly. Elora waved back, she could feel her face turning hot with discomfiture and agitation, but the girl just stood relaxed, letting her eyes wander to the window for a second.

“So… My name is Starla, and I’m guessing your Elora?” Starla cleared her throat, then assumed with a smile, her voice fresh and steady, like everything that happened didn’t happen at all.

Elora nodded her head as fast as she could, then felt dense for not talking. Then again, everything in her head was already a mess. She curled her toes in her shoes, a sly smile across her face. She walked closer to Starla, who was trying to not stare at her tomato-red face. Elora worked up her courage to speak as she looked at the door. She opened her mouth to speak, but her plans were cut short when the door started to open deliberately, creaking in a way that made Elora get goosebumps from the top of her head to the end of her toes. Another roommate was coming, and this time, she wanted to make sure it wasn’t going to be awkward.

Elora held her breath, watching a girl with strawberry blonde hair take a big step in, and turned a brighter shade of pink than Elora. Elora remembered her from earlier, asleep in her yellow swarm of light. She must be Bumble, then, Elora considered, watching Bumble stare at her feet, her nails in her mouth.

Starla turned and held out her hand. “Hi! I’m Starla. Nice to meet you.”

“H-h-hi,” Bumble staggered and bit her nails, her eyes blinking so rapidly Elora wondered if it hurt. Clearly, she didn’t notice Starla’s hand.

“I’m Elora,” Elora swallowed, her mind desperately trying to come up with something intriguing, but as words slipped out of her mouth, she realized she failed. “By the way, what lesson do you guys think we’re going to learn?”

Comments & reviews · 3
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Hiya! This is Orabella, here with a review.

Oooh! So far, I'm loving this! This is like an even more intriguing version of Harry Potter, and I literally enjoyed every minute of it! Starla and Bumble have interesting characters, and I can't wait to find out more about them!

I love the idea of passion forest. Now I really want to go there! What I'd work on is beyond me, but anything I'd do sounds so fun. Now I have a question for the Headmistress: What if you have multiple passions? Would you pursue all of them? Would you try all of them out and find the best one? Would you go with the one you enjoy most? What if you don't know which you'd want most? Will there be a character like Hermione Granger who tries to do them all? (That would be very silly).

By the way, here's a belated welcome to YWS! Hope you'll like it here. ^^

I wonder what sort of trouble will happen. I assume it's not going to be a story about how great the school is. (I wonder if there's a book like that. I think I'd want to read it.)

This is a great setup to what I can only assume is an amazing story. Please, keep writing!

Hi Orabella! I'm so glad that you're enjoying this! Your review bought a huge smile to my face.
To answer some of your questions, I actually think you sparked an idea. Later, Starla, Bumble, and Elora are revealed to have conflicts on their passion. And, I think it would be an amazing idea if I wrote another novella in the Passion Forest, but I actually don't know! You have a great imagination and if I think the headmistress would trap you in a forest to find out your true passion, maybe trying out what was truly meant for you. Haha, that sounds actually pretty fun. I'm considering a new novella in the same world, and maybe I'll add a character like her!
It sort of is. If you read on, if you'd like, you'll find out ;)
Thank you so much for your review, and thank you for your welcome!

Another story in the same world would be amazing! I'm glad I was able to help you find a new idea in your world. I'm seriously so excited about reading this story! (and the other if you decide to write it) It truly is a great idea, and I think you're the right person to write it. :)

Thanks! And of course! I'm so glad! I will try to write it ASAP, but these days I'm busy with school. Thank you so much again for your kind words :)

User avatar
NadyaStatham
Review

Hey @CarrotWrites,

I'm here to leave you a review on this incredible masterpiece.

First of all, I must say that I am in heaven, I mean Passion Forest. Your descriptions are vividly described and I love your plot. I am a big fan of amazing names, you definitely nailed that too! Your writing style is great and I totally support where this story is going.

Now off to the real review!

Try and improve on a smoother flow in the beginning :

I think it is an amazing way to make a start, but I think it comes over a little abrupt. I would suggest trying to smoothen out the scene a bit.

e.g.

It was not an everyday thing where kids get snatched by white beams of light to a forest where they learn to pursue their passion. But it happened—and there is no going back now.


Try and think from where do the kids get snatched from? Their homes? Schools? In the night when they are asleep? And how do the white beams manage that? Don't the children scream when they are getting taken? Are they in some sort of sleep when they are taken or not?

Gradually, the students woke, sitting up. Some looked flabbergasted, some petrified, and some thrilled. But to Elora, she was feeling it all. On one hand, she’s worried about her parents; Are they worried? When will I see them again?


I like these questions over here, I think they add another layer to the story and make the reader curious for what's going to happen next.

But on the other hand… The Passion Forest. She could learn, she could learn it all. How to become the best-selling, Nobel-prize winning, and above all, admired and valued author of her dreams. She could make friends, even. And from what she could tell, it wasn’t just any normal school, but a school in the forest instead, a school where teachers are wise, a school for kids to do their favorite thing everyday, a school supported by, what Elora had seen, magic.


Over here we are getting introduced to our protagonist, Elora. Amazing name choice! <333 I think your use of “she” adds a little hint of curiosity and that is just great!

~~~

Adding magic makes this story a whole lot more interesting, I think you've managed to execute that quite well. Usually adding magic in the wrong way can make your story become cliche, but that didn't happen to yours, yours was just a whole other universe. Ku2!

~~~

These two paragraphs tell the readers about the Passion Forest itself:

“For three decades, I’ve taught youngsters like you, whom I call seedlings. Every four years, unique students with a heart itching to bring value to our world gather in this very forest. In four years time, me and my crew will train you to the best of our abilities to make your dreams come true.”


“Each of you will be sorted into your own passion group, which we call your Passion Patch, where one teacher will guide you and other seedlings along with your passion. Then, each of you will get your own leaf, acting as a keycard to your treehouses, where you will sleep with your two other roommates. Breakfast and special occasions will be served in the Flower Grove, lunch and dinner in Shrubshome.” Headmistress Margaery finished.


While reading this, I can just see that you have put a lot of thought into this, I mean a leaf as a keycard, come on. Slayyy! Another fabulous name over here too, Margaery.

~~~

There are three times in the story where you have mentioned Elora wondering if she is going to see her parents again:

Gradually, the students woke, sitting up. Some looked flabbergasted, some petrified, and some thrilled. But to Elora, she was feeling it all. On one hand, she’s worried about her parents; Are they worried? When will I see them again?


Elora took a deep breath and asked briskly. “Will we be able to visit our parents? Do our roommates have the same passion as we? When will the classes start?”

“Well, those are some excellent questions,” the Headmistress chuckled. “Yes, you will be able to visit your parents during vacation every summer for one week only. No, roommates are random, but I trust you will become good friends despite your differences. The classes start tomorrow, after you all have some rest.” Headmistress Margaery paused, waiting for questions. “Now, each of you will be given a leaf; be sure to be careful with it, and don’t lose it.”

Elora tried to focus on breathing even, rather than how, in the past hour, she was dragged out of her family tent to a magical forest with her pajamas. Following the leaf, with her baby-pink light following her, her face lit up with awe as she strolled through Passion Forest. There are trees, each a different size and shape, thriving with juicy fruits and blooming flowers. Elora studied the treehouses she passed; each was built on a large tree, maybe eight times Elora’s height. The windows were polished and crystalline, small block-shaped houses built on massive tree branches. Wooden staircase twisted the way up. Each treehouse has three rooms, meaning nine seedlings in each tree. Who’s going to be my roommate? Elora wondered. Are we going to be friends?Is there a way that I can talk to my parents from here?


I do not know if it was your intention to mention it three times, because there is something going to happen in the story, I do think you owe the readers a little explanation for that. I mean, I am curious. Why does she long for her parents so much? Wasn't it her dream to come to Passion Forest?

~~~

Making the three girls, Elora, Starla and Bumble (Bumble Beam >> Bumble Bee, I saw what you did there. Smart!), nervous and all biting on their nails, stammering and one of them confident,is what makes your story more relatable to realism.

~~~

Overall, I love what you did with this story, I have the feeling that this is the beginning of something great. You have the potential for it, your story is coloured and an enjoyable read. You have an amazing writing style, and you have a strong context. Keep writing!

Have a nice day or night further! Keep writing! You are amazing!

Amazingly yours,
Rinisha

Hi Rinisha! I would like to thank you so much for this heartfelt and helpful piece of feedback. To answer some of your question, chapter one will be on how Elora got to the Passion Forest, and about her parents, how she's dragged into the water than above the clouds. It happens before the arrival at the Passion Forest, so it should clarify some things. But I'm glad you bought that to my attention, and I'll definitely have some revisions to make thanks to you. Later, Elora's parents is a big aspect of the story, but mentioning it too much without explanation could be confusing to the readers. I will try to fix some of that as well. Thanks for all you noticed, and you are wonderful too! :)

Im glad I could help! ;)

User avatar
foxmaster
Review

Foxmaster here to leave a review!
First of all, I find the plot here very interesting, and I can tell that this is going to be really interesting.
So, let's get to the review!

It was not an everyday thing where kids get snatched by white beams of light to a forest where they learn to pursue their passion. But it happened—and there is no going back now.

Gradually, the students woke, sitting up. Some looked flabbergasted, some petrified, and some thrilled. But to Elora, she was feeling it all. On one hand, she’s worried about her parents; Are they worried? When will I see them again?

okay... an interesting start! First of all, you swap around from past-tense to present tense. Also, in the last part, I would italic it, because it seems like she's thinking it, but it dosen't exactly look like that.
And from what she could tell, it wasn’t just any normal school, but a school in the forest instead, a school where teachers are wise, a school for kids to do their favorite thing everyday, a school supported by, what Elora had seen, magic.

Here, you put present-tense again, and also this is a kind of run-on sentence, so I would get rid of few of the commas, and replace them into periods.
redolence wind rustling the leaves. Magically, leaves from each tree fluttered off their boughs and billowed past the students, who all ogled in the direction the leaves were scurrying.

There's some repetition here, as you say "Leaves" a lot.
Elora twined her toes in her baby pink sandals, what if she doesn’t learn it all? But what if she does, who will she become? What will she learn?

once again, you mixed up past-tense with present tense, and I would replace that comma with a period.
Elora’s eyes widened, what if she could make a difference in the world? Then she would matter to the whole world! That’s...

Here, I would get rid of the comma and replace it with a period (I know, I say that a lot ;)) and I would also put "That's" as That was.
Elora worked up her courage to speak as she looked at the door. She opened her mouth to speak,
[/quote][/quote]
You say speak here twice, which seems unnecessary, so I would change it to:
"Elora worked up the courage to speak as the looked at the door. She opened her mouth...."
And, that's all! This seems genuinely interesting, and I love the plot. Also, if you're looking for anything to do, I suggest some of my work :)
-Foxmaster
This review courtesy of
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Hi Foxmaster! Thanks for this review, and pointing out some important details that I didn't spot. I will definitely take your advice when revising my story! :)



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— The Bee Movie