Hey! Just wanted to say this is really good and I think it describes the mindset of a writer very well. It's so relatable. Also I like this transition of color at the end
I absolutely adore this. And the visual at the end...ugh just so amazing. So. Amazing. I read this every day you know xD I always come back it. That's a rarity for me Excellent work!
hey there .wow i'd have to say it is a great poem.and please do correct me if I am wrong.but i believe it speaks of procrastination , about how we always find an excuse not to do something.you could have thought about the worms from day one, or the fact that your fishing in a dead lake.it also speaks about an overthinking mind, so much to say but your lost for words?
That is awesome. Ohmigersh.
It's so.... beautiful. Wow.
This is - I just -....... uh. <3
claps and snaps
This is a work of brilliant art. : )
I have no words for this. A poem hasn't affected me like this for a long time. <3
I almost don't want to review it because of it's near-perfection as regards the style. Carina this was absolutely wonderful; the whole time you managed to maintain the slow degradation of your punctuality and your overall control of the piece - in turn showing that you had all the control. I hope that makes sense I think that the idea of the fish being the words you need, right there and yet somehow - unfairly - out of reach, is a great metaphor for writer's block. I found it really relatable and I guess that's the main reason I got into it. I once described a writer's mind as a cavern where the stalactites are ideas waiting to crash home. That also made this piece relatable to me; it made me think about my own writing and not giving up and all that motivational mumbo jumbo, which I appreciated because it's probably the kick in the bum I needed! Thank you!I think the slightest bit of improvement you could possibly achieve in this piece of art is to overdo the breakdown even more; maybe you could work at this from different angles, like changing the fonts to see if any suit the confusion better, or maybe try some misspelled words or something... I don't know. That's not the way to improve, that's just showing how you could approach this in different ways. The way you could improve, as I said, is to overdo the breakdown; talk about the line breaking, or the rod slipping out of your hand, or catching the fish only to get too excited and let it escape again, or accidentally kicking the bucket of bait over. Make it a bit more... just more. I loved it, and I can in no way complain about it, I'm just racking my brain trying to think of a possible improvement. I understand if you don't want to make it 'more', because this also has the element of being truthful as regards simplicity. The words are there. You have the rod. You have the bait. And there's just nothing biting. It's so simple that more might ruin it, but as I said it's just about different angles. Maybe it would ruin it, but there's also the chance that it could make it ten times better. I loved how you went from white to black, like you were sinking deeper into the depths of confusion and the despair of creative malfunction, like the light of inspiration was slowly dwindling away. I loved the whole breakdown, and because of my slight OCD, I loved the way you centered 'tomorrow.' at the end.Overall, it was brilliant, and I urge you to try to be this diverse in the future. Even with pieces that aren't a completely new breed of style like this one, even with pieces as clichéd as Arnold Schwarzenegger's script for every movie, please try to introduce this creative spark you're showing here. I've seen too many talents waste away in bland scribbles. For some reason ( ) I don't think that there's any chance of that happening here.Your imagination is the key element of your writing; it's not always about the best descriptions or the best plots, it is - however - always about making an impact. This did, and I hope to see just as much effort in your future pieces. Thanks for the change, and the newness, and the absolute gorgeous piece that you've blessed my memory with.Yours in ink,TS.
This is stunning. Oh my goodness. I wish I could like it a million times. <333
wow!!! That is so cool how you did that transitions, its like you are actually on the boat fishing! i loved how the way you described things. this was really really great.One thing tho, i didnt understand the whole changing the font, i mean i kinda understood, you were trying to do different stanzas. i think you could have done this someother way. But really i thought this was really good, one more question is what happened to the sea, i thought she was in a dead lake. anywho... it still was fantastic. lol my dad fishes ALOT.Maddie
Please answer a question for me?Curiosity is killing me. ---Katie
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