Young Writers Society

Hell there. Ken here a for a quick review!

Nice and interesting piece you've got here.
I love literary works themed in horror and this piece right here sure painted an eerie atmosphere.
Loved the way the poem went hand in hand with the title.
Perhaps when I give birth to my first child, I'll sing this lullaby to put her to sleep every night. (though I wouldn't want her to have a different approach to life when she grows older, lol)

Secondly, I feel the punctuations and capitalizations are a bit off. Maybe you're trying out new styles? I'd love to know.

"Your mother is there too
Watch her with her
Arms wide open,
Despair has sunk in her face,
She has been expecting you."

Like here, "Watch" I think the W would have started with a small letter.

"Hush dear child, sleep well
The pale, frail hand of the night
Caresses you lightly.
"Do not fear, heed my call
Join my basket of dreams"

Also here. I'm not sure what you intended to achieve by putting this " here.

Over all. It's an interesting piece. Keep writing!

This is terrifying in every way possible which means you totally nailed it. Some of my favorite lines are:

"Do not fear, heed my call / join in my basket of dreams" (love that, makes me picture woven dreams that trap you into a false sense of security)

"Despair has sunk in her face, / she has been expecting you" (so creepy!!! in a good way of course)

I picture an old witch telling this story to another child she captured and I guess she'll put in a stew? let's hope not. but anyway this was perfectly spooky and appropriate for the season. great job!

Hiya, I'm penn. And...

...I don't know why, but I'm getting some Bloodborne vibes here, considering the bleeding stars, the shadows that drown nature in blood, and all the imagery that revolves around darkness and night and, of course, coaxing a child to sleep.

It has the same bleak feeling as most lullabies you pay attention to; death, decay, disease, darkness.

Children. *shudders*

It all blends together with talks of monsters and forgotten innocence, and I keep feeling like I'm being dragged back into the starting areas of a video game that I've never even gotten past. Hurray! I'mma go play and fail at Bloodborne again.

I mean, if you meant to pull off dark, gothic vibes, reminiscent of one of the most legendarily difficult games you could play, good for you! If not, well, I don't mean to downplay something so nicely written. I give it a thumbs up.