The Perfect Woman

by Ardor

Published January 20, 2025

12+

In Magic, Dreams and the End of the World

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Perfectly poised, a porcelain doll,

Elegant posture, never a flaw,

Radiant smile, concealing a hollowness all,

Flawless complexion, defying nature's law. 

Eternally cheerful, suppressing all pain,

Cooking gourmet meals, while never complaining,

Thoughtfully silent, a perfectly blank screen,

Without an opinion, barely ever seen. 

Obedient and meek, a submissive art,

Man's ideal woman, playing her part. 

Alluring yet distant, a frigid delight,

Never herself, perpetually bright. 

Comments & reviews · 7
User avatar
lovelydove
Comment
lovelydove commented Comment · Nov 18, 2025

I just loved this poem. While somewhat a controversial topic, you handled this poetry wise like a champ. This was beautifully constructed.

This poem just really described how women are seen as the lesser vessel (as the Bible says). Particularly, with women in earlier years, like the 1950s and so on.

The line:

''Cooking gourmet meals, while never complaining,

Thoughtfully silent, a perfectly blank screen,''

really describes how women were supposed to behave, to act, to look. Even though it was primarily in earlier years, even now, in relationships, women are supposed to be silent and doing anything for their man. WHERES THE FEMINISM?

Overslly a very delightful poem.

User avatar
lovelydove
Comment
lovelydove commented Comment · Nov 18, 2025

I just loved this poem. While somewhat a controversial topic, you handled this poetry wise like a champ. This was beautifully constructed.

This poem just really described how women are seen as the lesser vessel (as the Bible says). Particularly, with women in earlier years, like the 1950s and so on.

The line:

''Cooking gourmet meals, while never complaining,

Thoughtfully silent, a perfectly blank screen,''

really describes how women were supposed to behave, to act, to look. Even though it was primarily in earlier years, even now, in relationships, women are supposed to be silent and doing anything for their man. WHERES THE FEMINISM?

Overslly a very delightful poem.

User avatar
lovelydove
Review
lovelydove wrote a review Review · Nov 18, 2025

I just loved this poem. While somewhat a controversial topic, you handled this poetry wise like a champ. This was beautifully constructed.

This poem just really described how women are seen as the lesser vessel (as the Bible says). Particularly, with women in earlier years, like the 1950s and so on.

The line:

''Cooking gourmet meals, while never complaining,

Thoughtfully silent, a perfectly blank screen,''

really describes how women were supposed to behave, to act, to look. Even though it was primarily in earlier years, even now, in relationships, women are supposed to be silent and doing anything for their man. WHERES THE FEMINISM?

Overslly a very delightful poem.

User avatar
lilian Review
lilian wrote a review Review · Jan 21, 2025

Greetings! Jumped in for a quick review.

Wonderful. Wonderful. Wonderful. Absolutely wonderful. I typically don't enjoy poems that play around with a lot of rhyme, but it suits this poem perfectly. I got the impression of a doll (Well, duh). Though oddly specific, I got reminded of one of those music boxes with a ballerina, slowly spinning/never faltering.

I honestly don't have anything to critique. Just wanted to put down my thoughts. This was a absolutely wonderful piece, I would love to read similar works in the future.

User avatar
IcyFlame
Review
IcyFlame wrote a review Review · Jan 21, 2025

Very on the nose, perhaps yes, but still very poignant. I like how you've used a pretty rigid structure to connect with the symbolism in the poem. It almost has a musical quality, which I find kind of eerie - a little bit like when you have creepy children singing nursery rhymes in an abandoned playground.

The vivid imagery was particularly compelling for me. The 'porcelain doll', 'flawless complexion' and 'radiant smile' are all beautiful but hollow descriptions and I think you've used them well to contrast between appearance and reality. It's almost like a personification of something that isn't human, even though the subject is in fact human.

I think you've kept this to the perfect length to make it powerful and convey the message clearly. Thanks for sharing.

Icy

User avatar
veranet
Review
veranet wrote a review Review · Jan 21, 2025

Hi, it's Vera here leaving another review.

I wanna start by saying I love this work though that may be controversial because of its topic. You describe the woman in the poem to unrealistic standards like the ones society has on women even now, so I think this is a super accurate way to describe what people actually expect of us. To be perfect, it's simply impossible. It's standards that are too much to fulfill and I think you captured this perfectly.

Overall, I liked the poem and its message is significant. The message can be easily perceived by its reader.

User avatar
Ardor
Comment
Ardor commented Comment · Jan 20, 2025

Admittedly, very on the nose.



I'm effortlessly ironic.
— Link Neal