Take Me Home: Chapter Five: Hit the Fan

by Andrea2676Marie

Published June 4, 2013

16+ Language

In Take Me Home

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.

Hit the Fan

No. How did he find me?! He obviously knows I took the money. But how did he track me all the way down here? I’ve been gone for about two months now. OUCH! Carrie screamed loud with fear and pain as her ex-boyfriend, Danny Sanford stared back at her with rage-filled eyes.

          “DANNY! Stop! I just needed a few hundred dollars to get me out of town! I’m sorry! I’ll pay you back!” Carrie protested, while the blonde-haired ex-boyfriend was struggling to get his hands around her neck.

          “HEY! Get off her!” Steven’s voice rang through the air. She saw him and Jay running towards her.

          “Whoever the hell you are, this is none of your business,” Danny spat, pointing a finger at the brothers.

          “Excuse me? You are on my property, and obviously not welcome. I’m not going to say it again, get off her,” Steven said, narrowing his eyes at the man. “Don’t test me,” he added.

          “I wouldn’t be here if this little thief didn’t use me and steal $400!” the man explained.

          “I really think it best that you leave, before the cops get here,” Jay added, sensing all the tension between his brother and this man they didn’t know. He looked as though he was actually starting to leave, before abruptly turning to kick Carrie right in the ribs. That did it, causing Steven to red-line in about 2.2 seconds. Jay immediately went to help Carrie, while Steven grabbed the man by the chin, forcing him to look straight. CRUNCH! Steven’s fist made contact with the man’s nose, creating a very loud cracking sound. The man stumbled back cursing in agony, and dizzily walked the other way leaving a trail of blood in the sand.

          “Are you okay?” Steven asked Carrie, who was being helped up by Jay. Tears streamed down her tanned cheeks, and she left Jay’s assisting arms and ran into Steven’s. Crying and feeling embarrassed, she buried her head in his shoulder.

          “I’ll tell everyone to call it a night,” Jay explained, turning towards the house.

          Carrie stood there, crying, while Steven’s arms wrapped around her. He stroked her hair, trying to calm her down.

          “Carrie who was that,” he asked her, knowing she probably didn’t want to talk about it, but he couldn’t help himself.

          “An ex-boyfriend. W-we only dated for a few months, last year, and he was a jerk. I dumped him. But I-I…I needed the money to get down here; I couldn’t wait any longer, so I took it from him. I know it was wrong. I know. How did he find me Steven? Why? I f-feel so stupid!” she half choked out.

          “Shh, it’s going to be okay. Let’s walk back, you need rest. Are you hurt?” he asked, putting his arm around her waist to guide her towards the house.

          “I’m fine, probably just a bruise,” she quietly answered, not wanting to talk anymore. I can’t believe this. I just want to disappear.

          Steven walked her back up to the house, and brought her to his room. Bringing her a glass of water and some ice for her side, he said,

          “Jay called the police, and they’ll need a statement from you of what happened. I would leave the money part out of it okay? It was cash right?” he asked.

          “Yeah it was cash. He would keep around $500 at home for emergencies. Steven I am so sorry for what happened. I was just so dead set on leaving; I didn’t care if I stole money from an asshole. I’m not that kind of person though, I would never…you know. Please don’t think differently of me because a stupid decision from the past traveled to Florida to bite me in the ass. I’m sorry,” she trailed on, taking a sip of the water.

          “Stop. Don’t apologize, you have no reason to. I understand why you did what you did to get away. I get it, but I just want to make sure we don’t have to deal with this guy ever again, okay sweetheart? If it was cash then he really has no way to prove you stole anything. So why don’t you come with me downstairs why we wait for the police,” he offered, holding out his hand. She stared back at him for a moment. His looked almost, apologetic, as if he was the one that was sorry. She had just ruined his barbecue, and now the police were being called to his house. This is all my fault. They’re going to kick me out…did he called me sweetheart?

          “Okay,” she finally replied, taking his hand. He pulled her in close and kissed her forehead. They waited downstairs in the sitting room for the police to ring the gate. Jay was twitching and fidgeting in his chair across the room.

          “Jay, is everything okay? I’m really sorry about what happened, I know this is my fault,” Carrie said to him.

          “No, you’re fine. I’m fine. I’m just glad you’re okay,” he replied, tapping his foot on the ground, anxiously.

          “Carrie it’s not you. Jay just gets…paranoid around police. He isn’t a very law abiding citizen,” explained Steven.

          “You know what Steven? Shut your mouth! Like you’re just perfect, whatever!” Jay snapped, clearly irritated and nervous.

          “Jay why don’t you just go upstairs, we can handle talking to the police,” Carrie chimed in. After the words left her mouth, the gate rang. Steven got up to let them through, and Jay bolted upstairs. Hearing his door slam, Carrie and Steven waited to talk to the police.

 

          Jay flew onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He wasn’t mad at Carrie or Steven, he just hated cops. Damn pigs. Remembering he left his phone in his nightstand after changing into swim trunks earlier, he retrieved it. Scrolling for his band-mate’s number, he pressed send.

          “Hello?” a voice answered. Jay breathed a sigh of relief, staring up at the scarves decorating his room.

          “Chase. I need you to come back here,” he explained.

          “What? Why? And why the hell did you tell everyone the barbecue was over? You never end a party early, everything ok?” Chase asked, his car engine audible in the background.

          “I’ll explain it when you get here. I need a fix. Now,” Jay said, the need and want slipping through his voice. Chase sighed, and laughed slightly.

          “I got your back bro. See you soon,” he answered.

          “Sounds good, but come through the back door. Park at Jodi’s or something and come from the beach. We have… unexpected visitors,” he quickly said. Hanging up the phone, he traveled down the hall to the billiard room where they spent most evenings together. Jay remained there with Chase the rest of the night, blaring music. The room was full of smoke and alcohol by the wee hours of the night. They even invited a few girls over who ended up in Jay’s room. Needless to say, the guys were occupied for the evening.

 

          A week passed, and Steven and Carrie were taking it easy. Steven spent time working, and stayed in at night with Carrie. They made dinner together, watched a movie, went swimming, or just had a drink and talked. Jay on the other hand can never sit still for very long. He had gone out every night since the incident on the beach. Every morning, he would resume his regular spot at the kitchen island with those oversized sunglasses and a cup of coffee.

          Steven pressed send on his email, and swiveled to face his assistant, Mr. Dean Bennett. He was a big help to Steven, helping schedule his life and giving him advice here and there. He was an average-looking man, who had sandy brown hair with brown eyes. Having a wife and two children, he wasn’t into the partying as much as Steven, but he still had fun.

          “Steven, today is Friday,” Dean commented, adjusting his glasses. Looking at his assistant, Steven raised an eyebrow.

          “Friday, as in you have a dinner tonight with your father? He flew in last night and is staying in Naples,” Dean reminded him with a smirk.

          “Ugh. Yeah I forgot. I told Carrie I was going to bring her,” he thought out loud.

          “Yes that’s right. Does Miss Moore have an evening dress?” Dean inquired. Steven scrunched his eyebrows together looking his assistant square in the eye.

          “Of course she has a dress, what would make you think she didn’t? I don’t believe her financial status is of your concern, if that’s what you were hinting at,” he snapped.

          “No, I didn’t mean it like that,” Dean defended himself. He always gets so on edge at the simple mention of his father. It’s going to be sweet walking on eggshells the rest of the day.

          Steven didn’t reply, he just stood up and walked out of his office into the kitchen. Jay was asleep on the kitchen island, literally. Butt in chair, and the top half of his brother was flat on the counter, snoring. Realizing he didn’t want to be at his house right now, he drove to Langen’s Marina. He needed his friend Ashley to give him a motivational speech about bringing Carrie to dinner with his father.

         

          Carrie looked at the cell phone Steven had bought her a few days ago. She was still trying to figure out how to use it, but she noticed that today was the dinner date with Steven’s father. He had invited her to come with to dinner, not sounding too excited about it. She didn’t know much about anyone in his family besides Jay, but she did know that they had issues with their father. She decided to go downstairs and find a snack, and as she walked into the kitchen she chuckled. Looking at Jay passed out on the counter was a sight to see. She quickly found some leftover barbecue and heated it up. As the microwave started humming Steven’s assistant, Dean, came into the kitchen.

          “Hi Carrie,” he said, soon noticing the older Canter brother passed out.

          “Hey Dean, what’s up?” she replied, grabbing a napkin from the counter.

          “Just came to tell you that the car will be leaving around 3:30pm to take you and Steven to Naples,” he replied, sounding calm and somewhat bored.

          “Okay thanks Dean, I’ll go get ready after I eat something,” she explained. He stood in the entry to the kitchen, looking awkward and unsure of what he should be doing. Carrie quickly finished the leftover chicken, and went to her bedroom to get ready. About an hour and a half later, she was putting the finishing touches on her hair. Steven had bought her a dress for the occasion, saying that the one Jay had picked out how long ago wasn’t dinner appropriate. She wore a black and silver dress that had intricate designs on the top, hugging her form. Looking in the mirror, she winked to herself. Lookin’ good! Grabbing her small silver clutch, she went downstairs.

Steven was dressed in a nice suit and looking dashing as always. He looked her up and down, smiling as he held out his arm for her. Taking it gracefully, they proceeded to the car. It took around an hour to drive to Naples and find the hotel that Mr. Canter was staying at. Once they arrived, an employee escorted them to the table they were going to occupy for their meal. Because they were early, they ordered a few drinks.

          “Okay, I don’t mean to freak you out, but my dad can be a bit to handle. He’s really intimidating to people,” Steven started to explain, Carrie just nodded, figuring there was more he wanted to spill out before his father arrived.

          “When my mother had her first affair while married to my father, he started to become really distant. Since his wife was out on the town with different men when he was working, he set his sights on Jay and I. In his eyes, we will never be good enough, especially Jay. However, the catch to the cliché is that when either one of us brings a girlfriend into the picture, we’re gods. He criticizes everyone we have ever introduced him to. Except one of my ex’s, but the only reason he accepted her was because she came from big money. So I just want you to know what you’re getting into,” he said, looking at her for a response. She didn’t cease to surprise him when replying,

          “So are you saying that I’m your girlfriend?” he didn’t see that one coming, at all. Thinking about it, he realized that they didn’t have a label on their relationship. If they did, it would probably be big news to everyone else. What the hell, we act like we’re in a relationship anyway. The only thing we don’t do is sleep together, and that doesn’t need to be rushed. I’m not Jay. I want her to feel comfortable. Snapping out of his thoughts he looked into her hypnotizing blue eyes.

          “Only if you’ll have me as your boyfriend?” he replied, smirking at her.

          “Yes. I would love that,” she responded, smiling back at her new boyfriend. He ran his hand through that messy hair, and chuckled.

          “Well, here we go,” he said, raising his glass to cheers her. After taking a sip from their drinks, he saw his father approaching the table in all his glory. On his arm he brought a lady, with long, straight, dark brown hair. Those brown eyes that appeared almost black connected with his, and the woman winked.

          “Shit,” Steven breathed out. On the arm of his father was the one person he dreaded, his ex-girlfriend. Charlette.

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
Dhendon
Review
Dhendon wrote a review Review · Jun 30, 2013

Again, not one chapter ceases to amaze me. It has been a while since I have been around for a review of your chapters, and I have missed it. This is such a wonderful story that I keep wanting to find the time to read it all over and over again.

On to the review. Of course, as with every writing piece, some grammatical and spelling issues were present, but again, simple fixes. I won't bore you with naming every place a comma is needed or a letter was missed. Instead, on to the plot line.

I love the story you have created here, and I was amuse by the role of Jay in this chapter, especially when he was passed out on the counter. He is a very amusing character which adds some humor to the entire story. You have definitely done a fantastic job of character development in your story, and I love it.

Now, I also must say that the ending of all of your chapters has the perfect twist where it makes the reader just want to keep reading onto the next chapter, which is brilliant and I love it.

Perhaps a very more details, because enough well written, well placed details is never surpassed, but overall a wonderful chapter and I have no major complaints. Great job! Continue on.

User avatar
Deanie
Review
Deanie wrote a review Review · Jun 22, 2013

Hi Andrea!

I came back for more of course. I'm liking where this story is going. I'm not sure how I feel about that Danny episode. It seemed like a bit of a random twist - thrown in there for action or something. So I'm not really liking that, but the is a lot I do like!

Steven's character is coming through a lot. Although Carrie is starting to sound like the kind of girl who follows him around anywhere and agrees to anything he says. What happened to the girl who didn't just want to take his money? What happened to finding a job? Those were strong characteristics of Carrie's at the beginning, and in my opinion you shouldn't just drop those.

We've heard so much about the father of Jay and Steven, and I like how you've built up all that ego around him. Now it's time to actually see him, so you've got the reader really interested. We're also interested in Charlette now, seeing as she sounds like trouble.

Be careful not to drop things along the story though. Jay and the police! What's up with that? Will we ever know more? And how about Steven's mate Ashley? Be careful not to forget her. And lastly, just reminding you about Carrie's characteristics. These were all good beginnings to some good old action, so don't just drop them off. Carry them through the rest of story. They can make some interesting plot twists!

Last review it was more about layout and grammar and all that. All that information also applies here! As this does for the rest of the story as well. But it's all shaping up nicely! Looking forward to future chapters!

Oh, and one more thing. Even when a character asks a question within the speech marks, don't forget to use a question mark. Look out for that amongst your writing!

Deanie x

User avatar
paula08
Review
paula08 wrote a review Review · Jun 4, 2013

Hi Andrea!

You really managed to hook me to this story. Really I am so excited about the hopefully soon upcoming chapter. What can I say? Keep writing!!!!! You have a great talent. I have only one question to ask you though: Is Carrie trying to get a job? I mean she said she would but till now there is no indication that she has tried to find one.

PS: I love your descriptions of the characters and how you managed to end each chapter in a way that it makes the reader curious about what happens next.

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT???? (haha... I think my longing to read the next part is quite obvious :) )



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