Mr. somebody

You know, I think the concept is good and all, but other than the corrections already made by Elinor Brynn I have one qualm. The peace is very, very clishe. Many people have done what you did over the years and the only way to have made your letter an exciting read was to put your own spin on things. I think you didn't do that very well, but that can be fixed. My advise, take out a sheet of paper and start creating the character of Mr. Somebody and then you can write a letter specifically geared for the imaginary man you created.

Alfreto, if you've made it up, regardless of if it "could happen" or not, it isn't Non-Fiction. This is straight up Fiction. Also, don't try to explain away a good review by coming up with a distraction. You do realize that your argument for why her review was "not helping at all" was basically "You assumed my piece was in non-fiction because it actually happened to me THUS the rest of your review is just your own opinion too.", right?

I'm betting you sent her a private message too going something like "u suck!! never reveiw anyting again if u can't be nice!!!! omg!" That's the usual kind of stuff you people with your injured egos send out, and trust me, we find those private messages hilarious.

Take the advice she gave. Did you think your story was perfect and flawless? The first time I posted a story on here people pointed out plenty of mistakes. In retrospect (I wrote the thing over 2 years ago) I could definitely have made it better. But even then, do you know what I did? I thanked them, and it was a good thing to do because otherwise I would still be using the wrong punctuation marks at the end of dialogue (," not .") and I'd still not be using spacing in between dialogue.

Swallowing your pride and taking valuable advice is one of the hardest things to do, but it's also one of the most rewarding.

ok for those of you who need a little hint about the story
this is non-ficiton meaning it doesn't allways have to happened to me its just fact. its a letter to the person who will later in life become your soulmate or whatever. I wrote it for any girl who thinks they will never really find anyone because of the situation they are in now. there is someone out there and really we all know it we just don't know who. and you are soulmates with the person even though you haven't met them yet he or she is your soulmate.

ok sorry I just get irritated when people mess up the story and turn it into just their own opion not helping at all.

Hello, Alfreto! How do you do?

Alfreto wrote:Dear Mr. Somebody,
^
#0000BF ">I'm only one sentence in, yet im confused. Who is Mr. Somebody, and why should I care? Who is he supposed to represnt?

We may not know it yet, but someday#008000 ">,somehow we are going to fall in love.
^
#0000BF ">Grammatical Errors Fixed.
#000000 ">Also, I think 'You' rather then 'we' makes a little more sense, considering the MC who is writing this letter would know it if he/she is writing it down.

I may have seen you around once or twice, in fact, we may be great friends or we could be total strangers in two different worlds.
^
#0000BF ">Run on sentence alert! If you don't know what a run-on sentence is, it's basically where two sentences are mashed together and they aren't supposed to be.
#000000 ">A good way to divy up these sentences would be; I may have seen you once or twice. We may have been great friends, or two strangers in different worlds.
(Two does not need to be repeated)

Either way one day we are going to fall so hard that it will become impossible to get out.
#FF0000 ">^
A few things wrong with this sentence.
1)"Fall?" Do you mean fall in love? And get out of what?
2)'Either Way one day' Dosen't flow very well. If you are going to keep it in this paragraph, There should be a comma between Way and One. If not, try to find a way to rephrase it.

Although we are perfect soul mates
^
What, wait? What happened to 'some day we'll fall in love?' I thought that the two characters were not in love, and now there perfect soulmates? This is a tad confusing.
we don’t always agree, fighting to the point where we are about ready to murder each other.
#008000 ">kill works just fine...saying murdered makes it seem a little like you tried too hard.