If there was such a thing as a contract that would sentence one to an immediate and painless passing from this world, imagine how many people would sign it in pleasure. If you thought about it thoroughly, you would come to realize that our population would decrease by thousands upon thousands of digits, for all those who are afraid to leave this world by their own hands. Would families still hold funerals for those that signed the contract? A person may be delayed to sign a contract binding them to a legal agreement, although a contract of death is another matter. If a man has thought that he would only be awaiting marriage and children, working and taxes, as well as imminent death, why would he bother to go through the pains of adolescence? He may die in a car accident at age twenty, and in death realize that he worked in the circle of life to die at a young age.
When a human is born into this world, they come to terms that they must not fail in academics and must find a wealthy job to support himself as an adult. He may wed, and when his wife dies in a fatal incident, he will turn to what God he believes in, if any at all, and ask: what have I done to deserve this? Such is the contract of life. When born into this world, we have to accept that there is a pick of the litter motive behind society. You will meet the contract of life many times as you continue to live on, and you will have to sign his demands or deny them and die with them.
Where would you sign? To the contract of life, binding you to the endless circle of the struggles of human achievement and embarrassment? Or perhaps the contract of death, granting you a painless death? Your life is about as important as you make it out to be. Despite this, no one will remember your name after you are dead unless you were wealthy or contributed something extraordinary to advance society, rather in religion, medicine, technology, or the like. Life is an injustice, man to man, and death is the ultimate quiet unless you shout in the face of the void--which is impossible with human limitations. In a few decades, or perhaps days, your family will walk on your grave, and will walk upon the bones of people with memories as vivid as yours. Lust, sadness, rejection, poetry, music...do humans feel and compose these things to entertain their short time on this world?
Perhaps mankind feels an electric charge when he betrays the values and morals of society and lavishes in it because he knows that he is not what doing what he was told to do. You will do as you are told to do. If you do not conform, be warned of the shadows of your own karmic debt dancing on your walls. If you think you are sacrificing your life to better the place of this Earth as a selfless hero, you have already wronged yourself as laughingstock. You will probably think that this is simply a foolish, pessimistic collection of papers. This contract is an acknowledgement of your place in the courtroom as a powerless individual that must fold into the close-mindedness of today's world until your name is in the obituary papers.
Sign Here,
_________________
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138,124 Literary Works • 672,071 Reviews
So I haven't even started reading yet, but pertaining to your description box about the piece: If the topic is Philosophic you can never overdo it you can only not be thorough enough. So this sounds promising & let's get the ball rolling!
I am startled at how well you put this together. Let us do the nitpicks and then I'll talk about the message-- because that's all that's worth talking about here seeing that the writing and focus of thought is already well above average. Dracula already told you about the stray what, so I'll leave that be. When you say pick of the litter, I would probably mesh that all together with dashes.
"He may wed, and when his wife dies in a fatal incident, he will turn to what God he believes in, if any at all, and ask: what have I done to deserve this?" - Seeing his wife dying is hypothetical situation roleplay, and you say the man Might wed, you should probably say but then maybe his wife meets with a fatal incident. Also I would probably end that sentence there or at least give it a semi-colon there, because it seriously needs a pause before he turns to prospect his going forward.
Despite this, no one will remember your name after you are dead unless you were wealthy or contributed something extraordinary to advance society, rather in religion, medicine, technology, or the like. "And then remember even in that limited event, your Initials and Title is all that will be glazed over by outpouring of generation." - adding something like that could make it even better.
Lust, sadness, rejection, poetry, music...do humans feel and compose these things to entertain their short time on this world?" - That's what I'm talking about; get to the real issue of ALL things!! GREAT job!
"If you think you are sacrificing your life to better the place of this Earth as a selfless hero, you have already wronged yourself as laughingstock." - I know, if you think about it you gotta think 3 times, and another one sideway-Z
I know, today's world often pats itself on the back for being open-minded when it's still the same close-minded shop that's it's ever been! Nothing has changed except, well in America, people hiding in their houses and never crawling out except to crawl into their car and dash inside the bank, the office, the warehouse, the factory or another brick or drywall structure for who knows exactly what reasons. It's as if people are crossing their fingers and taking every chance they get to utterly minimize the odds of any potentially awkward encounters. Not only are they not very open-to-change they are also sealing off their hearts with those minds, and willing to rake in the trash from nasty and perverted comedic shows, cartoons, and music. But if you don't want to be alive I guess it's entertainment you are not going to stop shoveling down, eh? It'll make the days trickle by faster. But if it makes you mad, or sad, or bored enough, you'll start looking for something that is really worth the Investment: and of course there's no way it'd be on earth. The important thing is, I guess, if like yourself, you have enough hypothetical imagination, sort of like that of Albert Einstein, to fill in the gaps where the ethereal parts of logic go: probabilities.
Excellent Writing, Exxtreme Depth, you are Awarded a 100/100 you-Aced-this-baby from Me!
Much appreciated.
Hey there, Aleta. Happy almost end of Review Day.
Before I begin, I'll just point out something that catches my eye instantly. The 'sign here' with a comma after it, and then nothing else. You should put a line or [insert signature or something like that after it. Or finish with a full stop instead of a comma, just so it doesn't seem so unfinished.
If there was such a thing as a contract that would sentence one to an immediate and painless passing from this world, imagine how many people would sign it in pleasure
Yep, overpopulation would no longer be a problem. You touch on a really serious topic though, and I think it's one hundred percent true. I'd probably sign, not straight away, but eventually. Because we're all scared of death, even if people say they're not, I think they're still worried about the unknown, and any possible pain.
When a human is born into this world, they come to terms that they must not fail in academics and must find a wealthy job to support himself as an adult.
You go from 'they' to 'he'. The quick fix here is to change 'they come' to 'he comes'.
Perhaps mankind feels an electric charge when he betrays the values and morals of society and lavishes in it because he knows that he is not what doing what he was told to do.
There's a stray 'what' before 'doing'.
This was awesome! It really gets one thinking, and the topic was so deep. Have you read 'The Book Thief'? I reckon it sounds like Death could be saying all this, writing the contract. It's incredibly thought-provoking and well written, just fix those couple of nitpicks I found. Also don't forget to add a line at the bottom for people to sign.
Hey there Aleta, Nikayla here with a review!
So you've decided to dabble in something outside of poetry--and that's interesting. I haven't seen anything like this from you as far as I know, so let's jump right into the review! I felt like the paragraphs were rather daunting in their size, at least to some. You could most likely break a few of them up if you wanted to because not all of them follow the same thing and some also drag on for some time, which is mostly why I mentioned it.
We see that this article or essay tackles the idea that there's not really a contract to life or there is and you have to sign it or want to avoid signing it. Everything of that sort. I would have liked to see more on the fact that life comes with death and with one comes the other. I think I've heard this saying somewhere in another poem on the site that I quite liked, but yes, life comes with death and death comes with life.
Some parts of this article/essay are rather insensitive but I'm sure you didn't mean for it to come across in that way. I would have liked to see more care taken on these places, like in the first paragraph when talking of suicide and then in the second paragraph when talking of disability because it feels like you didn't do a whole lot of research for those two things? When writing articles or essays, even ones that are filled with pathos and emotion and don't use facts, it's always important to research these types of things rather than just writing it as you see it.
The end of the article/essay is stronger than the rest of it with your point being made with the last part with "Sign here". Something else that I wanted to touch on is that you say a person is born first but then you continue to use "he" throughout the second paragraph and it's a little confusing as well as it assuming that the person reading happens to be male. I know "mankind" is usually thought of to be a male but I don't really like this part of the essay all that much for it.
I hope I helped and have a great day!