Young Writers Society

Loved your poem.

Unable to afford a break from the thoughts that live rent free with it

Cool poem I love the word play used throughout that justifies the title "Around the World". You use word play and figurative language very well in this to show how you as a being, use physical aspects of your being to describe yourself, your feelings and actions. This put an interesting image into the readers heads. The wording also keeps it from being too heavy, deep, or dark, making it a easy to digest read but still getting the feelings and points through.

My favorite lines are: "My bones have traveled countries

From how far I’ve stretched them to find the good in others"

and:

"My mind stays indoors

Unable to afford a break from the thoughts that live rent free with it".

Hi, leleparadise, Pineapple here for a little review!

I really liked this poem. It was very realistic and I'm sure a bunch of us readers can relate to it. You perfectly illustrated stress and how nerves can go sky-rocketing when an individual gets anxious.

You wrote how a person can almost shut down and feel out of control. You also showed how someone can depend on another person and think they're great but be turned on in the same moment. Especially in this sentence, "my bones have traveled countries/ From how far I've stretched them to the good in others." I think there was a little typo there but aside from that, I understood the message.

This was a great piece and I hope you keep writing more!

Signed,
Pineapple

I like this poem.It’s relatable.For one thing,I relate to the poem,because I feel like I’ve lost some of my myself.With each passing day and more things to do,you lose sight of what’s important in life.I relate to the last line,I’ve felt like some of me is lost.I hope you have a nice day/night.