Young Writers Society

Wow, that was... epic. You write some seriously amazing poetry. :3 *is totally not a stalker at all for reading nearly all of your poetry* <.< >.> <.<

Oooh, I'm so curious about the riddle part! ^.^ What is it? Um, death? That's abstract and unseen... And it could be the "darkness in the grand infinity" you mentioned. What about something like antimatter? Or maybe melancholy? People say melancholy is sadness and joy at the same time. "He who increaseth wisdom increaseth sorrow" and all that. I really have no other ideas.

Anyway, awesome job! X3
~Curiosity Killed The Cat

Dang, this is so great, fort. Your riddles are awesome
I'll take a swing at it.. a mirage? But I don't know how can a mirage be dark (which is why I didn't choose sunlight xD)

Oh.. Fortis.


You have blown my mind >>


I love this. I do.


I can't really... Find anything to nitpick at. And I normally am the nitpicking type for very simple things...


I really loved,

I am the color of infinity,
for I am every color, aged.
But I am more beautiful--
I sing more truth--
when I am darker,
for there is more darkness
in this grand infinity
than light.

Hi, GreenTulip here to give you a review. It's Review Day but I am also here to give you a review for Poetry Exchange.

So, I would love to mention the fact that I know that this is a well written poem, from the parts I read. I love reading poetry, but this isn't my type of poetry. It just makes me want to close out of it, just by the first few lines. This is how I base if I want to continue or not, and your's didn't make me want to do so.

I have nitpicks on the small part of which I did read.

You used "I am the..." and "I am..." a lot in the poem. It could be used for poetic means, but I feel like it just dissolves the meaning of the poem into a small little pebble that used to be a boulder.


I can't say a lot more without, so I must take my leave.

Hello! I'm here with the poetry exchange!

Hey, this is beautiful. I know you've already had people telling you that, but it really is quite lovely.

Lines I liked:

I am the life between parted sunbeams,
the color of your dreams.

I am the hue of city subways

The remnants of clouds in those windows.

for there is more darkness
in this grand infinity
than light.

that piercing, invisible shade.

The remnants of clouds in those windows.

I am the truest soul of the ocean.

I am the paint of deep-thinking, deep-twinkling eyes,

I am the hue of city subways,
of buildings and of sidewalks.
I am the truest soul of the ocean.
I am the glimmering sheen of your tears,
The color of your sadness, but also your joy.

I exhale the hue of city subways,
of buildings and of sidewalks.
the truest soul of the ocean has baptized me.
I glimmer in the sheen of your tears,
the color of your sadness, but also your joy.

I sing more truth--

This was really fantastic. Whether it be poem, riddle or even flash prose. I wouldn't know the answer to the riddle, but I think treating it as a riddle itself might just make the reader awkward in his/her not-understanding! Better to just look it as creative writing, in which it excels at. Each line is filled with strong, vibrant imagery. You didn't overdo lines, which is key, knowing just when to stop and keep things simple and powerful. You didn't add needless adjectives to such lines as 'I am the smell of rain' and 'the remanents of clouds in those windows', thus preserving their emotional intensity. There's something deeply melancholic about the piece, as well as a sense of wisdom and profundity.

Excellent work.

Flame here, as promised! Happy Valentine's!

I'll admit, it's strange answering a request for an experienced poet I requested a review from recently, but I'll take a stab at it.

The answer is...

Beauty? Shadows? Darkness! No, nevermind. Hmmm...

Alright. Let's scrap all stunning entrances, go with an outline of my situation: I'm writing a review. On a flawless poem/riddle. That, quite frankly, intimidates me.

So I hope you don't mind me treating it like prose...

This would make a fabulous poem. Every expression fits together like pieces of an intricate jigsaw puzzle. "Flows" isn't quite the right word, considering the repetition, but the pace was well-measured. Oh yes, the repetition. It was marvelous. I could see the line breaks without them being there. As I said, this would really make a fabulous poem.

My favorite sentence was the conclusion: "For there is more darkness in this grand infinity than light." Its lingering effect was bolstered by the poem's dark theme. And the truth of it...

Onto the meager nitpicks!

"All Beauty Sleeps"
And nothing human lasts.

...meet,
that piercing...

I spread myself thick, unseen.

...the truest soul of the ocean.

Iron

Reflecting... something, but no one knows what.

for I am every color, aged.
I am light and dark.

when I am darker.
For...

Hmm...horizon? Twilight? Sunset? I have no idea...

This is also rather a riddle...