Wisteria’s Wistful Woodland

foundational disease

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Dead Alive by The Shins. I rolled author's choice twice. So, I decided to write a free verse based on the title.

my body is a temple.
my soul is an altar
i have termites in my teeth

carry my stench on a prescription pad
place fungal cream on my tongue
if this is meant to fight the rot
then why i am still rotting

it's easy for the flower to tell the fly
"you are more than the garbage inside"
but the flower wilts when the corpses pile
it's the fly's job to keep them at bay

my body is a temple
abandoned, graffitied, ransacked
my soul is an altar
overturned, charred, stripped for parts

mold fits nicely in my heart
i have to smile through the cavities
as i breathe through maggots

Fear and Annoyance Hold Hands (And I Suffer)

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Boys Will Be Bugs by Cavetown. I rolled spoken word and incorporating a lyric.

What's the polite way to tell someone you'll never trust them with your feelings?

It feels like all some people want to do is help, but their assistance is a control freak. Your tears are an insult, your fear is an annoyance, and the fact that you're not helped by their frustration is ridiculous.

Well, I'm sorry I don't respond to anger. I'm sorry I can't rationalize irrational feelings. I'm sorry the awareness of my bad timing and overreactions doesn't stop me.

I hate being seen by you. It feels like a pop quiz. You make me feel stupid. I mumbled that I was worthless until I stopped crying. You mopped the floors and rolled your eyes. My throat closes around you because your confusion always comes out as hostility.

I'm scared of you. I'm frustrated with you. I wish I knew how to explain myself to you. That I will never be rational. My tears will not always have an explanation that makes sense to you. The only answer I have is that I'm mentally unwell and I've been unwell for so long I have forgotten what it was like to be anything else, and sometimes my thoughts bubble over like a pot filled too much and I break down to your chagrin.

But that's now the answer you want to hear, so I'll block it out and never feel it when you're near.

Sun Shatters

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Free Choice Friday Sunday! Today, I picked Lost in Time and Space by Lord Huron. I did a free verse poem and incorporated the lyric, "stay right here and let the cosmos twirl."

we'll open our mouths and swallow the sun
burn our initials into the spout of Mt. St. Helens
and when the world ends
we'll find a way to survive it all
just to stay a we

we'll burst into gravity
and stardust
and light

we'll stay right here and let the cosmos twirl
because we know who has the key
we pass it between our tongues with a kiss

kill them with kindness

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Walls by The Lumineers. I rolled free verse and the theme.

cry tears into stained glass vials
kill them with kindness
smile so wide your teeth creak
keep your ringer on while you sleep
kill them with kindness
making your tongue drip melting sugar
call the cuts lovebites
take out the locks on all your doors
kill them with kindness
scream as your hair falls out
then use it to make flower crowns
give them out like a saint
and humble yourself in their praises
kill them with kindness
sit with the empty feeling in your chest
every time you make someone smile
but you can't
but never cry because you won't stop
and the paint melts when wet
kill them with kindness
even though the only one dying is you

The Bloodstained Rearview Mirror

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Amerca by Imagine Dragons. I rolled free verse and a lyric. So, I was inspired by the lyric, "for all the ones who gave until they died."

I stand here
for all the ones who couldn't join me,
for all the mes who didn't make it,
and I cry
because I feel undeserving
like the ones who didn't make it
would be so much better.

For the little girl who wanted to see the ghost,
for the little girl who talked to strangers,
for the young lady who auditioned at the musical,
to the young woman who dreamed of big things,
I am sorry for everything.
I held your life in my hands and I dropped them.

No one prepared me for how fragile identity is,
and the things you used to be proud of
become your greatest weaknesses.
I'm sorry to all my pasts who scowl in shame.
I hope I make a future you're proud of.

Foresight

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Third Eye by Florence + the Machines. I rolled free verse based on the song title.

Tie a blindfold around my forehead,
put a finger to my lips.
You explode with divine energy,
it burns against my skin.

Snap off the evil eye on my bracelet
and crush my hematite ring.
Tell me I don't need them when I have you.

Stick crystal quartz into my side
and say that bleeding is cleansing.

Tie that blindfold tighter.

Burial Ground

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Parachutes by Coldplay. I rolled free verse an author's choice. I decided to use the song's theme.

You live in my home like ghosts do,
just around the corner,
in the corner of my eye.

I hold you in my arms like a gravestone,
solemnly at the place our love was buried
even though it's decayed.

Let me hold one last seance for us
spell out 'I love you'
so I can pull the planchette to goodbye
and you'll leave this place.

Our room is how you left it.
I wish gravediggers would pillage this shrine
but the only thing that's changed is the dust.
I mourn you at our spot by the bed.

Weight in Youth

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Free choice Sunday! It's just easier with LSS. Sue me. I picked the song The Good Part by AJR. I decided on a free verse based on the song's theme.

I tell myself that youth is a precious resource
but I hate the way it rattles in my purse.
I long for the days when I have spent it wisely
and my path stretches before me.

But to reach a destination
I must pick it
but I feel sick to my stomach looking at the map
and I want someone to steal my purse.

I miss the days when my parents bought me things.
They sent me in one direction or the next.
I'm battered and broken by their choices,
but at least I don't have to bear those mistakes.

Let me skip this cutscene of my life
until I am finally sure of what I want.
Unfortunately, the purse in my hand isn't a controller.
It's currency for the train ticket to the future.

Judas and his Gold

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Grace by Florence + the Machine. I rolled free verse and the song's theme.

I don't remember when it got this bad
I have memories like pocket change
of braiding your hair
and eating your homemade cookies.
Now I watch you through stained glass windows
because your eyes are too stoney to see me.

Remember when we went to the beach
and the tide pulled back far enough to
show us sand dollars?
Your mom yelled at us to go to higher ground.
I ignored the way your tide rolled back
and I drowned breaking sand dollars in half.

Now your new friend braids shells in your hair
and you're at church sun-burned
and grinning like a freshly born angel.
And I am Judas,
the ghost of chocolate chips on my breath
and a pocket full of coins I have instead of you.

Dinner Plans

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Into the Wild by Phillip Phillips. I rolled author's choice and incorporating a song lyric.

"i'll see you friday,
invite your friend for dinner
we'll have a grand time."



"i want to see him
we'll go to the place he likes
he's just so funny."

:)

Today's Inspiration:

Spoiler

Today's song was Headfirst for Halos by My Chemical Romance. I rolled free verse and song theme.

Smile
Some people were made
to bear the weight of the world
And the pressure
is too great for your
silk soft hands
Smile
Because I'm here
to protect you
I'll bear every cross
every chain
I'll keep the devil
off of your shoulder
by locking him in my brain
Smile
My sacrifice will be your freedom
and you will rule the world
My blood will be your crown
and the terror I take with me
will never come after you again
Smile